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Reviews
Trust the Man (2005)
Surprisingly amusing..
My husband and I switched onto this very much by accident the other night. I recognised Billy Crudup and decided to give it a go. I know other people have called it 'shallow', 'unrealistic' or 'pretentious' but I think it's safe to assume they just couldn't relate to it and put that before the fact that it is 'just a movie'. I've met enough people to know there are characters and relationships out there that very much compare to those played, although perhaps concentrated for the sake of fitting them in 90 minutes, and this made it all the more amusing. And although the theatre scene is probably unrealistic I found it highly entertaining, it was a good way to highlight the men's slightly immature attempts to get their ladies back in a fun way. It's a comedy, not a documentary, enjoy it for what it is.
Aunt Rose (2005)
Proof that there is such thing as a good low budget movie...
but some people have no bleeding idea how to do it.
Bad acting, bad story line, extremely bad special effects. Yes it has breasts and blood but even the breasts aren't worth watching this for. I'm guessing this was previously reviewed by the cast and crew, that or someone reviewed the wrong movie. Or perhaps the guy down the local fancy dress store thought it would be good advertising for his contact lens range.
At least the sound guy saw sense and occasionally tried to drown out the actors.
Just don't waste your time, you'll only hate yourself later.
Alone in the Dark (2005)
Christian Slater should sue...
Can't believe I sat through it, I guess I was hoping that some thing good might happen, how disappointed was I? Lets sum this up quickly as enough of my life has been wasted by watching the movie. Non existent script, a weak, if not already shattered, plot line, bad acting, pointless characters, obvious attempts to pad out the film eg random "sex" scene, blatant rip offs of Aliens (even to the point of seeing drool drip behind a soldier for him to turn round to see a snarling Giger creation rip off, oh and the soldiers name was Burke), bad audio encoding, bad choice in music, terrible directing, a lot of stuff that doesn't make sense, eg how does one door hold back thousands of demons? Where did all the previous demons come from if they were trapped behind this one door? Why does Slater say he cant see them when he obviously can because hes been shooting at it for the last five minutes? Why is that big man holding Slaters head so it doesn't hit the floor when hes hitting him? how come even after having five minutes to run to the door the thousands of demons seem to have forgotten their keys and wallet and had to go back and get them and are then held off by nothing more than Dorf's gun and manly stubble? And more importantly, WHY, Christian, WHY!?!?!?!
Anacondas: The Hunt for the Blood Orchid (2004)
Spoilers ahead
Starts well, then gets a little bad, then just gets worse. Typical American anti-brit rot. Every character is a stereotype, the strong women, the bitch women, the rugged ex-army fella, the sexy black fella, the rugged mysterious fella, the one-who's-obviously-gonna-die-first fella and then the annoying-supposed-to-be-funny-please-hurry-up-and-die black fella. The high light seeing the later get eaten only to be let down when he is saved.
Why is the brit always the evil one? I just don't get it. We're nice.
Please don't pay to see it. The acting's OK, but the scripts bad and there absolutely nothing original about this movie. Watch the first one. It's much better.
Dahmer (2002)
actually, I thought this was the most accurate ...
and not OTT serial killer film I've seen. I like the whole view of Dahmer as a very lonely kid. On reading about him you, or rather I, get that impression. Autophobia is a terrifying thing to suffer from and I can see how this, in an unstable mind, could lead to what he did.
The performances were great, especially from Jeremy Renner. The camera work was superb. The blending of flash backs with real time events were smooth and stylish. the soundtrack in fact was quite good too.
We all know the outline of your average serial killer e.g broken family - killing animals - beaten by mother - go kill women etc etc. Dahmer didn't fit this, probably why he got away with it so often and probably why he's more interesting than any of the other psychopaths out there. I think you'll find it dull if you are looking for blood and gore but Dahmer wasn't one of those kind of killers, he killed for company, not blood lust.
The Butterfly Effect (2004)
donnie darko meets sense
one of those films you should see for your self and not listen to critics. Although I do now have to write ten lines about it to get that point put up here. I personally enjoyed it very much. I think those who have too much time will sit there and try analyse it and then later sit here and try and put it down for its illogical logic .. or some thing. Just watch it and enjoy it for what it is. And for those expecting bad acting from Ashton, well, there is none. Its a long way from dude, wheres my car, thank christ, admittedly if I realised it was him at the beginning I may have hesitated to watch the film but, well, he definitly did a good job.
The film didnt have a single dull moment, none of it left me lost at all. Its not a copy of any other film, even if there is a slight similarity in feel to it. it's just a genuinly entertaining movie.
This Filthy Earth (2001)
art?
is it hell.
I worked on this film in a post production sense and I have to say that with in five minutes of it I tried to avoid seeing as much of it as possible, which unfortunatly I couldnt do. Is it necessary to juxtapose 5 year old girls with bulls bits to get some kind of impact? And if so what kind of impact are you trying to achieve? This should be locked up in the modern Tate with the rest of the rubbish thats considered art these days.
Its almost like the Texas Chainsaw Massochre vs animal farm on ketamin.