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BrianVantana
Reviews
A Little Bit Zombie (2012)
Good idea, some terrible acting, confusing script and over the top music. STAY AWAY!
I am so disappointed. I was really looking forward to this having heard of the concept and read some reviews comparing this film to Shaun of the Dead.
Let's be clear. This is nowhere near being on par with Shaun.
The film starts relatively promisingly and gradually deteriorates into a mindless, over- acted, unintelligent farce.
The blond girl with the glasses and crystal ball is by far the most irritating character I have ever seen on screen and is an awful "actress".
Any funny scenes are ruined by poor timing and delivery.
The dialogue at points makes no sense whatsoever and it seems the actors are reading from two different scripts.
It appears a "Space" channel movie has slipped passed the net and made itself almost into the mainstream.
I was massively disappointed as it was a missed chance to show Hollywood what Canadian cinema is capable.
You'd be pretty much better off spending your time doing anything else rather than watching this film.
On top of this, the music is also over-the-top and ends up being very distracting.
The Lovely Bones (2009)
Never what this film if you value your time.
How oh how will I manage to write a minimum of 10 lines on this pile of turd? I just read a review by some lunatic who gave it 10 out of 10. I will put it into perspective for you. If you have been unfortunate enough to catch more than 30 seconds of any of the Twilight mistakes and multiply the awfulness by 10 then you will be getting close to how terrible this film truly is. There are no redeeming factors. The acting is terrible. Worst of all the girl who plays the main character is terrible. I suppose you can't overly blame the cast considering the terrible screenplay. I guarantee you will cringe with of cheesy predictability. More than 10 lines yet? Good. This film is a biohazard. Steer well clear.
Battle: Los Angeles (2011)
Great movie! Why so low a score?
I am glad I did not see the score for this film otherwise I may not have chosen it.
I love Independence Day for what it was. Cheesy fun.
This, by contrast, gives a much more personalised view and, ignoring the fact that there are aliens, far more realistic/believable.
There was only one mildly cheesy monologue and the scenario could be set in any modern war.
The characters were portrayed with honesty and you really do come away with a sense of the camaraderie that exists between soldiers.
I would highly recommend this to anyone who enjoyed Independence Day all those years ago.
I would love to see a sequel.
Goes to show IMDb is not flawless!
S.S. Doomtrooper (2006)
Just had to say something after just 11 mins!!!
Set during World War 2.
Sgt Digger, a British explosives expert, wears the red beret of the MPs with an SAS cap badge and is a Royal Marine.
Now there all those errors are within a second so imagine how terrible the rest of it will be.
The CGI looks like children have scribbled on the screen with crayons.
The film stars that bloke from Parker Lewis Can't Lose and guess what they call one of the characters?
Yes, you guessed it.
Complete lack of imagination.
How does money get spent on this tosh?
Oh, I just saw Sgt Red Beret SAS Royal Marine Commando tell off one of the other soldiers for not camouflaging his helmet whilst said Sgt is wearing his red beret with an SAS badge.
Is that 10 lines yet?
I am going to eat some ice-cream instead of watching this.
I enjoyed Transformers 3 the other night although it is a bit long and the Deceptacons out- number the Autobots by far too much.
When is the next Batman out? Bloomin' excited about that.
Night night.
The Hurt Locker (2008)
Shamefully inaccurate.
This is honestly the most frustrating film I have ever seen.
I was expecting something amazing, considering it beat Avatar to the Oscar.
All my military buddies agree that there is barely anything in here that is representative of what actually happens.
EOD on their own running the whole show. WRONG
EOD chasing guys down through buildings. WRONG
EOD guy leaving a compound to do an 80's style one-man mission into Baghdad. WRONG
If I remember correctly, they are also expert snipers too. YAWN
All I found was inaccuracy after inaccuracy which created a film more reminiscent of Rambo III than anything else.
It does nothing but injustice to all the lives that have been lost out there.
It certainly does not do what it says on the tin!
If you have any form of military service, give this one a miss.