Reviews

The film follows four threads, all equally directionless and boring. Nothing happens, it's slow and tedious. The dialogue is forced and awkward, it feels like a play. The script is absolutely terrible with no story. It's quite nicely shot, but the snow looks fake and it doesn't feel cold - you can't see anyone's breath. If you're a fan of all involved (I am) and like slow-burning films (I do), consider giving it a go, but for anyone else, it's a complete waste of two hours. How or why this ever got made is a mystery to me. Pretentious, self-important, dull and pointless. This is a film without merit.

Familiar ground: a dystopian future with an oppressed under-class. The future aspect is relatively unimportant and probably only a decade or so from 2024, but makes for some colourful visuals. There are countries in the world that could host something similar now. I'm not sure where it's meant to be set, supposedly London, but because almost everyone was black, possibly South Africa.

The story is a dreary, vague and slow drama. There are few original ideas, plenty of cliches and you feel little connection with any of the characters. I didn't understand much about the rules of the society - how it became like this, what it was like before, what options there were. The world is moving away from this vision, poverty has been in rapid decline since the Industrial Revolution and continues to reduce, so there is a certain cynicism to it. If you're going to do this, at least be interesting or entertaining.

I have no idea why or how this was made. It was very unconvincing, feeling like a student film with a big budget. Depressing, unoriginal, pointless and very boring. Don't bother.

I was intrigued by the idea of a sequel to this 80s classic. Top Gun has showed it can work, so I was looking forward to it. Most of the cast has also returned.

The premise is based around King Akeem having only daughters, but finding he has an illegitimate son (and heir) following what amounted to a date rape - something that happened during the original story but was not part of the first film. This is a slightly odd conceit to base the story on.

It's not terrible, it has its moments, but doesn't feel like a natural or organic progression, more of a nostalgic cash-in. If you enjoyed the first one, curiosity will probably have you watching this, but prepare to be disappointed.

Enjoyable B-movie crime thriller. A taxi cab driver follows a getaway vehicle and ends up going under cover in order to catch the gang. A well-paced plot and generally good performances from a largely unknown cast. Jimmy Hanley is an interesting lead playing the now decent and reformed cabby. Characters smoke in almost every scene. It has a sense of calm politeness that many films from this post-war period have. Touches on striking, also a common of the time. The finale is exciting, with everyone coming together. It may have been the inspiration for the climax of Carry On Cabby a decade later. If you like this kind of thing, a worthwhile watch.

Has shades of 1963's Charade, which is no bad thing. A 2-part episode that was cut into a film. Part 1 opens with an exciting powerboat race and has some great locations, setting up the plot nicely. Part 2 is more insular and claustrophobic. You will probably see the ending coming, but there is still some mystery, with the Saint's ambiguity explored. It's entertaining with plenty of action and some interesting characters. Gayle Hunnicutt is a delight, a stand out performance in more ways than one way. The only thing that lets it down it the use of some green screen footage, which is rare for this series. Overall, up there with the best of the series.

The drug-related death of a young woman leads the Saint to the Gent, a local London dealer, and onto much bigger events abroad. The Saint's drugs ring infiltrating persona reminded me of Hugh Grant's cocky character in Guy Richie's The Gentleman. He is helped by the girl's reactionary and volatile father, a retired general. Enjoyable, action packed, and international. It has the gritty, realistic feel of the rest of the series thanks to the advent of smaller, lighter cameras. There are no obvious films sets or green screens, which keep it looking modern. This really does set it apart from Roger Moore's 1960s Saint.

A murder-mystery drama in a bleak and desolate environment. Interesting, well rounded characters inhabit a fairly simple story with some suspenseful scenes. You think you know what you're in for, but the slow build-up has you off guard and pays dividends, with a powerful double-whammy of incident and outcome. The big-name cast may lead to disappointment for some - this is not The Avengers. The dialogue can occasionally be unclear, and there are moments of unpleasantness that may not be for some. A poetic thread runs throughout. This is an engrossing, tense and moving film that deserves to be better know.

I've always been a fan of the franchise. It started as an enjoyable low-budget action flick, almost gritty. The customisation and cruising scene. Point Break with cars. It lost its way a little with parts 2 and 3, which were decent films, but each going in different directions, then found its rhythm with part 4. Parts 5 and 6 were the sweet spot, by which point it had become more of a rival for James Bond or Mission: Impossible.

Parts 7 and 8 were more ludicrous, moving into cheesy, Marvel-style, comic book fantasy, but were still entertaining. It was now a completely different animal to what it started out as. Part 9 took that further - into space! - which brings us to X.

Unfortunately, this is so ridiculous as to be almost meaningless. There is no tension, consequence or engagement as people and cars can do anything. Physics and mortality do not exist in this cartoon world - characters return from the dead, enemies becomes friends. Without a framework of any kind, not even a coherent story, it's mostly pointless. That's not to say it's unwatchable - with that much money on the screen, it passes the time. But the franchise is well past it's best and I don't see any way for it to recover.

This is trying to be somewhere between Bridesmaids and the Hangover from a black perspective. A very dumb comedy, but not in a fun way. This is bad taste, with lowest common denominator humour, unsophisticated, and a lot of shouting. Offensive racial stereotypes, presents men and women badly. A cliche filled story relying on gross set pieces and sentiment. I didn't expect much, but I got a lot less, and yet it was far too long. Absolutely terrible, almost completely unwatchable, soulless, and depressing. There isn't a lot else to say but I've got to write a few more words to meet the required characters.

Easy to watch entertainment. It wants to be slick and clever, but is largely implausible and silly, often nasty and unpleasant.

The real problem is there isn't anyone to rally behind, you aren't rooting for either of the flawed main characters. As a revenge thriller, it fails. There is little satisfaction after the first death. It's hard to get behind the increasingly wide target - the perpetrators, the legal profession, the system, anyone with a vague connection. As a police thriller, it fails. You're not hoping they get their guy. I'm not sure who the filmmakers expected you to back. That makes it feel a bit pointless and empty, if not depressing as everyone around them suffers.

A few surprises, the cast are fine, you aren't bored, but unsatisfactory, particularly the ending.

The best film I've seen of the glorious Ferrari Daytona SP3, one of the most interesting supercars of recent years - and now an endangered species. Beautifully shot in the Italian mountains, it feels like a dream as the V12 echoes around the sunset landscape with appropriate inspirational soundtrack. Back to reality, and it ends in a small Italian city with some wonderful reactions from ordinary locals who get to ride in the car. You can't help think how much better it would have been with one of the original presenters, but the car is the star. The rest of the episode is so so, but watch it for the Ferrari.

Of it's time. Not much of a story, more of a mood, the people, the situations, 90s club culture. If the characters seem annoying, it's because they were - portrayed by some future big-name actors. Probably very nostalgic to those who participated, more of an insight to those who didn't, and a document of its time. Clearly inspired by Trainspotting, which is an incomparably better film, but with enough originality to make it stand up on its own.

A mild deviation from the main narrative, this episode is certainly the most powerful and exciting of the series. This isn't about plot, it's about action and characters. The first two thirds are a tense build up to a siege (which is a follow up to a similarly impressive traveller camp sequence at the end of episode two). There is a well thought out, transitional, geographical sequence that gives scale and perspective to what is about to unfold in the final act. When it does, you'll be holding your breath. I've watched it several times as there is a lot to take in, but it's so we'll orchestrated and beautifully shot, you'll want to see it again. As good as television gets, up there with the best sequences from Game of Thrones, and more impressive than most action films. Genuinely innovative and compulsive, a masterpiece.

Self-indulgent, self-important nonsense with very little story. Generally well shot - at times, very beautifully - but with occasionally jarring green screen and the obligatory 1960s psychedelic interludes. The beginnings of the liberal attitude to sex and nudity on screen that has become unfashionable more recently. The border guard scenes will probably leave younger viewers shocked. Overall, a curiously of the time.

Despite the return of Vin Diesel, it fails to capture the spirit on the original, with a similar feel to the sequel, in style and budget. More comic book than Marvel, silly and CGI-heavy. As far as contemporary box-ticking, it has the diverse and inclusive cast, but sticks with the 'Bond girl' womanising, which No Time To Die abandoned. Diesel now looks a bit old for the role, but I understand there is a 4th instalment on the way.

None of the freshness of the original, a poorer leading man, less interesting locations, more ridiculous action. It might have scored a 5, if it were not for the the terrible CGI finale, which in 2022, looks worse than the average Playstation game.

Easily the best of the XXX films. While desperately trying to be cooler than Bond, it ends up leaning more towards the preposterous end of the Brosnan films rather than the more gritty Craig series. Nicely shot, good locations (Prague and the vicinity), cool cars, some decent action. It's good, silly fun; the terrible, po-faced, heavy metal soundtrack being the worst thing about it.

A very slick, glossy and well-paced opening got my attention. The accompanying whistling score was unique and enjoyable, and added to the feel of a professional, military-like operation. Fifteen minutes in, I was transfixed and had high expectations. Sadly, the story quickly falls apart. The cool and efficient team, gone; in its place, incompetence and betrayal, leading to an unsatisfactory second and third act, which were mostly pointless and predictable. It was almost a film in reverse.

Great locations, well shot, good performances, very much of its time. Thematically, I couldn't help think this may have been the inspiration for the 2004-2012 BBC series, Hustle, which had a similar concept (wise veteran, cool younger man, glamorous woman, who con greedy and unpleasant marks). Overall, worth a watch. With a better script, it could have been a classic.

A hard watch. The power of tribal ideology amongst amongst idiots. It's generally well done, but the tragic ending is grimly expected. Not easy viewing, with few sympathetic characters. Willis is underused and miscast. If you're looking for pure entertainment, look elsewhere.

Very derivative but good, low-ish budget fun. An amalgamation of Escape From New York (set in Scotland), Aliens, Mad Max and, most bizarrely, King Arthur. Pleasingly gory by today's 12-certificate standards, with reasonable action, and Bob Hoskins.

One of the most tedious big budget films I've ever seen.

How did I never see this? Another Talking Pictures TV gem. Preceded the year before by the excellent and similarly themed comedic classic, I'm Alright Jack, this hard-hitting drama is an ideal counterpart. A strong cast, headed by Richard Attenborough, with his wife very well played by Pier Angeli. I particularly liked Alfred Burke's scheming, Marxist, union activist, book-ending the film with his arrival and departure - on public transport, of course. It also features Bond regulars, Bernard Lee and Geoffrey Keen, an early role for Oliver Reed, and playing himself, Alan Whicker. It's not quite Kitchen Sink, which had more of a fashionable, if usually grim theme, but is in a similar vein.

Ignore comments about it being 'far-right', they are ridiculous. The film is a well-balanced, politically centrist take that in no way demonises unions or strikes, although occasionally feels a bit heavy handed with some of its messages. Clearly, pre-1970s, there was still a battle going on for the hearts and minds of the working class. A prophetic warning of the far-left politics that was to come over the next decade. By the time 1971's very silly and misjudged, but better known, Carry On At Your Convenience arrived, the battle was lost. Beyond politics, this is essentially a universal story about bullying, group think and the individual, and reminded me a lot of my school days. It deserves to be better recognised and watched.

An underrated and forgotten thriller that offers something authentic to a contemporary audience. It stands out for its unique backdrop and realistic, gritty feel - not a surprise given its credentials: Directed by Peter R. Hunt, who also helmed the similarly non-gimmicky, On Her Majesty's Secret Service, and produced by Michael Klinger, the man behind Get Carter. Roger Moore is largely an 'average' man, playing against type: a womaniser yes, but an under-achiever set up to take a fall. The rest of the cast is good, including Suzanna York, who holds her own in a well-rounded female role. An ideal match for Moore, their relationship is grown-up and believable. Ray Milliand is the dominant, straight-talking the patriarch. John Gielgud, Bradford Dillman and Tony Beckley are all excellent in their different ways as the bad guys.

Unlike similar movies of the time, the production values hold up well, in part due to being filmed on location in South Africa, with a lack of green screen. In the mine scenes, you feel like you're under the ground - it's oppressive and claustrophobic - because that's where it was partly shot. That contrasts well with the action above ground, including some spectacular aerial work. The plot is fine, occasionally lacking pace, but engaging and entertaining, giving an insight into the gold industry and market. There is little social commentary: one of the villains of the story is a white racist; one of the heroes, a black man; there is a shadowy London-based elite. Overall, it does its job with some great set pieces - my favourite, a mountain-top scene with a Rolls Royce.

The apartheid regime setting - controversial, when the film was shot - makes it a rare and interesting watch. Aside from actually being made in the country, there is very little that is objectionable specific to the film. Proceedings are captured in a matter-of-fact, almost fly-on-the-wall style, which includes the gold mines, city life and the beautiful surrounding landscape, with some authentic African dance scenes. There are no awkward verbal faux pas, as there can be from this period. Generally - wisely, perhaps - it doesn't make any strong political statements. The backdrop is presented as more a slice of life, with bigger themes going uncommented on and of less concern than its own particular story. It was not aiming to be on the right side of history - or the wrong side - it was just trying to be entertaining. It does that but also works on a relatively neutral, documentary level.

I hadn't seen Gold for 20-30 years. The film stayed with me from my childhood but has largely disappeared from our screens, partly due its age but almost certainly because of where it was filmed (there was even a trigger warning on Talking Pictures TV). I don't fully understand the controversy as it is now more of a monument to its time, like being transported back to the 1970s - both literally and fictionally - without the social commentary or agenda that biases so much contemporary work. An initial choice for director was Steven Spielberg who probably wouldn't have given the film the same hard edge as Hunt. Laughably - for political reasons - Wales was put forward to double for South Africa, something that would have produced a hollow counterfeit of what the film is. Released between Moore's first two Bond films, it stands the test of time better than either.

Gold is still very watchable and, with the passing of several decades and all that has happened since, has the added benefit of being an interesting and genuine historical work. Well worth your viewing time.

One of the worst films I've ever seen, bad in every way possible. I can't even begin to understand how this came into being. It looks like it was filmed on an iPhone with an effects app, maybe the first effort over a long weekend of a film student (who moved onto accountancy). I doubt the budget was more than $50k and most of that must have gone on John Rhys-Davies - what is he doing in this? I almost gave it 2 for comedy value but it's really not that funny and this sort of thing should never be encouraged.

I wondered how Patel's casting would be explained by the story. It wasn't and sets the tone for all the jarringly juxtaposed choices. This is Carry On casting for the 21st century. It goes without comment in an alternative Victorian universe. To a younger viewer, it might present a bizarre vision of history. With Hollywood's new diversity quota system, if a film is to be Oscar-worthy, this may be the only way for period films to survive.

In fairness, the film is presented as a kind of theatrical fantasy but I found the unsubtle humour cringeworthy and the acting pantomimesque. Cliched characters were more caricature than ever, with the exception of Patel, who was excellent. There was a contemporary version to be made but this wasn't it.

Nicely shot with a good score, it just about holds your attention for the (overly long) duration but it felt like a BBC TV film. In summary, a surreal, oddly cast, slightly smug, Carry On Dickens, mostly played for laughs with little emotional engagement.