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Crossover (2006)
Cross (Thank God it's finally) Over
*Groans*... where should we start? It feels like someone took a dump on my brain after watching this. Nick Cannon and some other guy from B2K star in absymal movie that is so bad You Got Served look like Blood Diamond. Absolutely nothing happens the whole movie yet every scene is pumping with music and slow-mo shots that speed up and slow back down again. Whether Nick Cannon is hanging out with his grandma or riding the bus or working at the shoe store, the fake urban appeal is more obvious than the war in Iraq being about oil.
The two main characters lose a basketball game in the beginning, meet some girlfriends, get in a fight and the one punches a fat white dude in the face. Money appears out of nowhere and you're wondering how they can afford these crazy things, apparently they are part of some underground basketball association but only play 2 games the entire movie (which takes place in about 2-3 weeks). By the way, the b-ball games consist of nothing but slam dunks - all of which are shown in angles that make the rim look like it was lowered to 5 or 6 feet. I'd rather watch clips from the video game NBA Jam.... boom shaka laka. Add in some baby mama drama, a pointless trip to LA, and some more under-developed characters and the film is pretty much summed up.
Oh yeah, Wayne Brady is in the movie, and apparently he thinks that playing rap music in his car makes him *not* look like a white black guy that appeals to women in their 40's. Yeah, keep it real man... anyway, the villain of the movie is not scene on camera, however Preston A. Whitmore manages to make your brain feel like one of those scrambled eggs from the "this is your brain on drugs" commercials from back in the day.
Buy or rent? Instead, give you neighbor's dog some laxitives and look out at your porch in about an hour.
Summary: nothing relevant happens the entire movie and you feel no emotion whatsoever for the characters. You could make a movie about this review I wrote and it would be better than CrossOver.
Dogville (2003)
Not to sound American this movie "sucks"!
I watched Dogville several months back (yes I downloaded it and I dont care) and found it rather boring. I normally find this artistic/ non-commercial type films very good but Dogville just didnt make the cut. First off I could give a rats ass about the anti-american messages that are presented in the movie. I'm a young man in college that doesnt get himself wrapped up in these politics so my word is totally unbias. But honestly, it's boring. I watched it with a couple friends and if it wasnt for the 24 pack in fridge everyone would have fell asleep. Besides the constant rapings and the end Dogville well is Dog****. Do yourself a favor and dl or rent, hell even buy something like Lost in Translation, or Monster, or 21 grams as they will provide a way more entertain experience then Dogville 1 out of four stars