Ah yes, a werewolf movie....if by "werewolf" one means a woman in yellow contact lenses and pointy teeth. Do not be misled: there are no actual werewolves in this movie. There is very little horror here as well. What we are treated to is a mopey girl who whines and complains throughout most of the film, saving the last 20 minutes for when she finally goes nuts, but even then, it's a huge disappointment because what you're expecting to finally happen..never does. The score was good though!
Reviews
162 Reviews
Paws P.I.
(2018)
UTTERLY BORING
11 July 2021
Skip this and go watch paint dry; it's more interesting than this snorefest. The story suffers from many plot holes, poor acting, and terrible dialogue. The fun bits make up less than 15 minutes and the climax itself is ultimately reached far quicker than you could raise and eyebrow and say "Huh?". The dogs weren't so much fun "characters" as they were just staring off into space while some actor flatly delivers lines over them. There is no entertainment to be had from this film at all. It feels like something that even the Family Channel would pass on. Save yourself the waste of time. Watch the trailer and you'll pretty much have seen the best parts in under 5 minutes. Yeah, this is a "fun family movie", if you're a mortician and your family are a bunch of cadavers.
Camp Nowhere
(1994)
A fun and hilarious summer camp adventure for all ages
20 February 2021
Growing up, I've always been jealous of the kids that got to go away to summer camps each year. To be able to go out on a weeks long adventures without parents, that's every kid's dream at one point. Camp Nowhere is just that. It's a story about a group of misfit kids that hire a reclusive con-artist to chaperone them at their own personal summer camp where they get to let loose and do what they want without parental supervision. Of course, it's got the stereotypical classes of youth: the glamour girl, the insecure brainy girl, the rebellious rule-breaking cool guy that everyone envies, the dorky awkward kid, and the goofy sidekick. Yep, they're all there. Each kid's parents are planning to send him or her to a specialized camp where they could hone their unique hobby skills whether it be theater, computer programming, etc...The thing is, these kids just want to spend a summer going "nowhere" and doing absolutely nothing in particular. So that's exactly what they set out to do. So they conspire together to create a camp where they could do what they want, when they want with no rules, no parental supervision, no counselors, no adults. Things start out fun but it all soon goes off the rails in hilarious ways.
You'll recognize Christopher Lloyd right away as the reclusive Dennis Van Welker. He took this film just after he completed Back to The Future 3, and Dennis the Menace. Lloyd is awesome and lovable throughout the film, as always. He's just naturally likeable with his funny and goofy antics. Also, a fun fact: Thomas F. Wilson plays the goofy cop in this film. You may recognize him as Biff Tannen from the Back to The Future movies. So this is a reunion for both Lloyd and Wilson as B2TF Alum.
Camp Nowhere is also significant because it was the debut of two future stars: Jessica Alba in her first film role as Gail, and Andrew Keegan who played cool kid, Zack Dell. Six years later, Alba would land a recurring role in the Dark Angel series, and Keegan would become a teen heartthrob with a long list of roles and appearances.
Overall Camp Nowhere a great family-friendly comedy driven a cast of very talented kids. Everyone will get a kick out of it. It fits into the Summer Camp genre nicely along side other films such as Heavyweights, Meatballs, Indian Summer, etc. Not a bad choice for movie night!
You'll recognize Christopher Lloyd right away as the reclusive Dennis Van Welker. He took this film just after he completed Back to The Future 3, and Dennis the Menace. Lloyd is awesome and lovable throughout the film, as always. He's just naturally likeable with his funny and goofy antics. Also, a fun fact: Thomas F. Wilson plays the goofy cop in this film. You may recognize him as Biff Tannen from the Back to The Future movies. So this is a reunion for both Lloyd and Wilson as B2TF Alum.
Camp Nowhere is also significant because it was the debut of two future stars: Jessica Alba in her first film role as Gail, and Andrew Keegan who played cool kid, Zack Dell. Six years later, Alba would land a recurring role in the Dark Angel series, and Keegan would become a teen heartthrob with a long list of roles and appearances.
Overall Camp Nowhere a great family-friendly comedy driven a cast of very talented kids. Everyone will get a kick out of it. It fits into the Summer Camp genre nicely along side other films such as Heavyweights, Meatballs, Indian Summer, etc. Not a bad choice for movie night!
The Even Stevens Movie
(2003 TV Movie)
Silly, Funny, Wacky and a Total Blast!
15 February 2021
Now that I've got Disney+, I've been having fun re-watching some of the old Disney shows that I grew up on. One of my favorites, back in the day, was Even Stevens which starred a young Shia Labeouf and Christy Carlson Romano, respectively as Louis and Ren Stevens. Well, at the end of that series in June 2003, Disney released The Even Stevens Movie which served as the series finale.
Even Stevens is a ridiculous sitcom which relies on slapstick comedy, pranks, and back-to-back goofiness to keep the laughs rolling through silly plots mostly consisting of the brother and sister duo outshining each other. Ren is the goodie two-shoes, perfect daughter, with an obsessive-compulsive pension for cleanliness, order, and organization. Whereas her goofy brother, Louis, is an inventive, creative misfit who, with the aid of his equally silly friends: Beans, Twitty, and Tawny, manages to get himself in over his head, often dragging his sister through the mud with him. Their parents and older sibling are just as wacky and dysfunctional, and therein lies the humor. The Even Stevens Movies, takes all the pranks, gags, and silly humor that you enjoyed in the 30 minute sitcom episodes, and stretches it into a full-blown movie taking place on some sort of Polynesian, pseudo-Hawaiian island that doesn't actually exist. Of course, because it's a film, it's got a slightly bigger budget and so you also have SNL alum, Tim Meadows, and Dave Coulier (aka: Uncle Joey from Full House). Despite it's flaws of which there are many (poor dialogue, terrible CGI effects, etc...), it still manages to entertain from beginning to end. It's fun. It's silly. It doesn't make much sense but it's a blast!
Iron Man & Hulk: Heroes United
(2013 Video)
Everything about this is Terrible
14 February 2021
Let's just get straight to the point. Iron Man and Hulk: Heroes United is terrible. The plot makes no sense whatsoever. It's kind of like if you started reading issue #3 of a Marvel comic book without having read #1 or #2. It's basically "something something random Hydra henchmen and Abomination. Iron Man and Hulk fight but then they help each other." Totally forgettable and convoluted. The animation is some sort of weird cel-animation meets CGI. It feels like they tried to literally make it look like a comic book pages, but it doesn't really work. It just ends up looking like pre-rendered cut scenes from a Playstation 3-era video game. Disney/Marvel does a lot right with their MCU films but seems to keep failing with their animated films. Basically....don't waste your time with this terrible animated film.
Mortal
(2020)
Whosoever, if he be worthy, shall possess the power
2 February 2021
You can't see it but I'm giving a standing ovation right now to the Director of Mortal, Mr. André Øvredal, and certainly to the Composer, Mr. Marcus Paus. Ladies and Gentlemen, this is it. This film, Mortal, starring Nat Wolff, is the hidden gem of an otherwise miserable and unfortunate 2020. It's a Norwegian film about an American who wakes up in the forests of Norway, only to discover that he has God-like powers. Mortal was released in Europe on February 28th, 2020 and with all the crazy stuff that happened around the world in February and March, it's not hard to see how this film was overlooked around the world. Hell, I hadn't even heard of it until Amazon Prime recommended it to me today on February 1st, 2021. Almost an entire year later! Now that things have sort of settled down a bit, I've been going back and watching many of the films of 2020 that I most surely missed out on. Mortal? Oh boy, let me tell you. This film is fantastic and I'm not blowing smoke here. From the very first scene, it captures you and doesn't let go. The cinematography is outstanding. The film direction and breathtaking scenery was gorgeous (Norway is a beautiful country, so lush, so green...Mortal highlights that very well). The writing and acting was great; Nat Wolff is the only person on this cast that I recognize. He did a great job but his cast-mates were all very talented actors as well. Now something that really stands out is the film score throughout the film, composed by Marcus Paus. It was gripping, tense, and really heightened the film. I've never heard of him before, but if this is his baseline, watch out for him in the coming future. You're going to be hearing his music in many great films, I've no doubt about that.
Should you see this film? Well, absolutely. Mortal is to Norse Mythology what Brightburn was to the Superhero genre. Mortal is intelligent. It has tension, it has heart. I can't express to you how good is this film. You should definitely see it.
Should you see this film? Well, absolutely. Mortal is to Norse Mythology what Brightburn was to the Superhero genre. Mortal is intelligent. It has tension, it has heart. I can't express to you how good is this film. You should definitely see it.
Chick Fight
(2020)
Wacky, Offensive Fight Club for Women
31 January 2021
Chick Fight is a hilarious over the top comedy starring Malin Akerman, Bella Thorne, and Alec Baldwin. Akerman leads the film as Anna, a woman who's down on her luck and who's life seems to be throwing her curveballs at every turn. Through a friend, she discovers a secret fight club for women, which allows them to fight each other in MMA-style combat as a means of therapy, to release the stress and anxiety they experience in their daily lives. It sounds ridiculous and defies common sense but, hey, its meant to be a ridiculous Judd Apatow-style comedy. Alec Baldwin plays her perpetually drunk, wobbly Karaoke-obsessed personal trainer who prepares her for a final showdown with Bella Thorne, who's a sexy athletic ass-kicker and Anna's #1 rival. Breakout performances go to Dulcé Sloan, who plays Charleen. She's Anna's BFF who happens to be a sex-obsessed lesbian cop who's always looking out for Anna but always ends up putting her in ridiculous situations, and Fortune Feimster who plays Bear Park, the leader and manager of the all-ladies fight club. Also look out for former WCW/WWE professional Wrestler, Kevin Nash, who plays Anna's flamboyant gay dad. If this all sounds crazy and offensive, that's because it is, but that's the whole point. On the one hand, it has an underlying theme of women's empowerment, but on the other hand it revels in stereotypes and generalizations, particularly when it comes to the LGBTQ community. However, it doesn't mean to intentionally offend as alot of these things are aimed at shocking and amping up the wackiness of it all. Some will be rubbed the wrong way by these things, but that's expected. I wouldn't say that Chick Fight is a great film but it does entertain. If you can overlook the fact that it sometimes feels like it's trying too hard to mimic Bridesmaids (which starred Kristen Wiig in an almost similar character role), or that it's comedy is a little too offensive, you'll atleast be entertained.
Ravage
(2019)
I Spit on Your Grave...but Dumb
30 January 2021
This is one of the most disturbing films that I've seen in a long time. Not even in a good way, like when I watched Saw for the first time. Nope, this is disturbing, weird, incomprehensible, and poorly written. It takes the formulaic female revenge film genre (see I Spit on Your Grave, Ms .45, Savage Streets) and flips it. The story makes no sense whatsoever. It's like they took the family from House of 1000 Corpses or the hillbilly cannibals from Wrong Turn and made them a super religious cult of weirdos....and of course it takes place in the Virginia backwoods, where most of the films in this particular genre seem to take place. The film is extremely violent but I felt like the violence was just there for shock value. It felt as if the writers kept pushing it to see how far they could take it. Some of the scenes were so ridiculous. For instance, in one scene, the woman is sitting in her truck when it suddenly gets towed and dragged across town, back to the the hideout where the crazy cultists live. The way that it happens is so stupid. Nobody in the entire town saw her truck getting towed or heard her screaming for help? She never thought to jump out of her truck and escape? Throughout the movie, she had so many opportunities to make a clean escape yet for some reason, decides to stick around and get herself tortured. Ravage tries very hard to build up tension throughout, but for most of the film, it is predictable and cookie cutter, (especially if you've seen similar films in this genre) until it gets to the end. The ending is a sudden abrupt and ultimately unsatisfying ending that, like most of the film, makes no sense whatsoever.
Borat Subsequent Moviefilm
(2020)
A fantastic way to mark the ridiculous state of US Politics
23 January 2021
Borat 2 was a strange film. After doing the first one and being exposed for your hidden camera antics, how do you repeat that formula without everyone getting suspicious? Well, Somehow Sacha Baron Cohen was able to do just that because, as his sequel, "Borat Subsequent Moviefilm....." proves, there are just way too many gullible idiots in the world.
Borat 2 (for short), is a ridiculous film. It takes the hidden camera antics of the first one and ratchets it up while focusing primarily on all the political insanity that hast permeated the US since 2016. Unfortunately, while the hidden camera sections are hilarious, the overarching narrative was utterly stupid. I would have enjoyed it more without the dumb story about Borat and his daughter, but I also understand that this sub-plot was the catalyst that launched the film and connected all little skits and bits together. Some of the hidden camera scenes were so outlandish and jaw dropping that I had a hard time believing that they were not scripted. I don't understand how in this day and age, some of the people would volunteer such thoughts and ideas aloud. In particular, the scenes involving celebrities should be insta-career killers. After you're featured in a Borat film, there's no going back from that. Sacha Baron Cohen goes to great lengths to avoid being discovered by relying on the use of his co-host, Maria Bakalova, who plays his daughter to capture them in hilarious ways. It shines a light on the ridiculous nature of US politics, especially when it pokes fun at Donald Trump, Mike Pence, and their administration. One stand out scene involves "America's Mayor" Rudy Giuliani. How he managed to survive the fallout of this film is beyond me.
With the Pandemic still raging, the economy is tatters, and the state of Washington in total chaos, if you need a chance to let loose and laugh a little, or alot, Borat 2 is your film.
Borat 2 (for short), is a ridiculous film. It takes the hidden camera antics of the first one and ratchets it up while focusing primarily on all the political insanity that hast permeated the US since 2016. Unfortunately, while the hidden camera sections are hilarious, the overarching narrative was utterly stupid. I would have enjoyed it more without the dumb story about Borat and his daughter, but I also understand that this sub-plot was the catalyst that launched the film and connected all little skits and bits together. Some of the hidden camera scenes were so outlandish and jaw dropping that I had a hard time believing that they were not scripted. I don't understand how in this day and age, some of the people would volunteer such thoughts and ideas aloud. In particular, the scenes involving celebrities should be insta-career killers. After you're featured in a Borat film, there's no going back from that. Sacha Baron Cohen goes to great lengths to avoid being discovered by relying on the use of his co-host, Maria Bakalova, who plays his daughter to capture them in hilarious ways. It shines a light on the ridiculous nature of US politics, especially when it pokes fun at Donald Trump, Mike Pence, and their administration. One stand out scene involves "America's Mayor" Rudy Giuliani. How he managed to survive the fallout of this film is beyond me.
With the Pandemic still raging, the economy is tatters, and the state of Washington in total chaos, if you need a chance to let loose and laugh a little, or alot, Borat 2 is your film.
The New Mutants
(2020)
The Final and Unfortunate Nail in Fox's X-Men Franchise
23 January 2021
Warning: Spoilers
The New Mutants is one of the stranger entries into what is now known as Marvel's Legacy films (Marvel's films under Fox prior to it's merger with Disney). The New Mutants is 20th Century Fox's final nail in the coffin for it's X-men related films. Everything to follow The New Mutants will be directly produced by Disney/Marvel and incorporated into the MCU over time. This is good as it will allow Marvel to finally correct all the issues with the X-men's fractured timelines and convoluted films. For those who don't know, The New Mutants was Marvel's precursor to X-Force which is originally led by Cable, the anti-hero introduced in Deadpool 2.
However, instead of a standard superhero origin story like Spiderman or X-Men, The New Mutants began it's story in a world where mutants already exist, and apparently have existed for some time. While it's not directly linked to the X-men or Deadpool films, atleast not on the surface, it does mention the fact that the X-men and Professor X do exist in this world and are an active superhero team. All the characters are canon original members of what would later become X-Force, except for Magik, Illyana Rasputin. According to Marvel lore, she's the sister of Colossus, the large metal X-man featured in Deadpool and Deadpool 2, though she never even mentions that he exists. These kids....the "new mutants"......Magik, Cannonball,Wolfsbane, Sunspot, and Mirage, find themselves trapped in high security institution, which is so high security that it let's them walk around freely as long as they don't leave the premises. Each day they attend sessions with their handler, a mysterious woman named Dr. Cecilia Reyes, who's job is to help them learn to harness and control their powers. Throughout the film there is a foreboding sense that things aren't what they seem. Little by little the teens discover evidence that make them question why they're there and draw questions about the motives of their handler. Initially they believe that they're being prepared to join the X-men but is that why they're really there? Things come to a head when they begin to ask questions and seek answers on their own leading to an action-packed battle between good and evil.
In terms of the greater X-men films, this is a nice change from all of the time travel, multiple versions of multiple characters thing that has so deeply destroyed the X-men series. However, among the X-films, it's not one of the good ones. It's not one of the worst either. I saved that place for Apocalypse until Dark Phoenix beat it.
Nevertheless, I appreciate it's choice to step away from traditional costumed superhero action and attempt to tell a much darker story in the same film universe. I just wish it was executed better. The honest truth is that if you never read any of the comicbooks like I have, and have only seen the other X-men films, you would have no idea who these people are or why you should care about them. Their characters are unfortunately not developed well at all. Viewers won't know anything about them; for the most part, they don't even go by their comicbook superhero names (as I've referred to them above) but rather by their regular names. Honestly, do YOU know who are Rahne Sinclair or Sam Guthrie? Probably not, unless you're a fellow X-Nerd. The New Mutants doesn't even give them the courtesy of identifying who they are through a proper introduction. Most of them don't even exhibit their powers through most of the film. Sure, you're given hints and glimpses into what they might be capable but it's not enough to know what they're all about. While it does drop several easter eggs here and there for the true fans, they're so well hidden that most people won't even notice. Simon Kinberg was on record as saying that wanted something that resembled a mash of Stephen King and John Hughes-like horror set in a superhero world. While that sounds fantastic, it doesn't feel like, in this particular instance, it was successfully achieved. Unfortunately, during development, there were alot of script rewrites and several people who were set to join the film were either re-cast or dropped entirely. In the end, what we got was a generic pyschological horror film which was painted over with X-Men references and in the end, it just didn't feel right. It didn't work. It could have been so much better had they developed the idea some more.
In the end, if you're a fan of the Fox X-Men movies, you may choose to see this but I assure you that if you decide to skip it, you won't miss out on anything important to the overall X-Men franchise.
However, instead of a standard superhero origin story like Spiderman or X-Men, The New Mutants began it's story in a world where mutants already exist, and apparently have existed for some time. While it's not directly linked to the X-men or Deadpool films, atleast not on the surface, it does mention the fact that the X-men and Professor X do exist in this world and are an active superhero team. All the characters are canon original members of what would later become X-Force, except for Magik, Illyana Rasputin. According to Marvel lore, she's the sister of Colossus, the large metal X-man featured in Deadpool and Deadpool 2, though she never even mentions that he exists. These kids....the "new mutants"......Magik, Cannonball,Wolfsbane, Sunspot, and Mirage, find themselves trapped in high security institution, which is so high security that it let's them walk around freely as long as they don't leave the premises. Each day they attend sessions with their handler, a mysterious woman named Dr. Cecilia Reyes, who's job is to help them learn to harness and control their powers. Throughout the film there is a foreboding sense that things aren't what they seem. Little by little the teens discover evidence that make them question why they're there and draw questions about the motives of their handler. Initially they believe that they're being prepared to join the X-men but is that why they're really there? Things come to a head when they begin to ask questions and seek answers on their own leading to an action-packed battle between good and evil.
In terms of the greater X-men films, this is a nice change from all of the time travel, multiple versions of multiple characters thing that has so deeply destroyed the X-men series. However, among the X-films, it's not one of the good ones. It's not one of the worst either. I saved that place for Apocalypse until Dark Phoenix beat it.
Nevertheless, I appreciate it's choice to step away from traditional costumed superhero action and attempt to tell a much darker story in the same film universe. I just wish it was executed better. The honest truth is that if you never read any of the comicbooks like I have, and have only seen the other X-men films, you would have no idea who these people are or why you should care about them. Their characters are unfortunately not developed well at all. Viewers won't know anything about them; for the most part, they don't even go by their comicbook superhero names (as I've referred to them above) but rather by their regular names. Honestly, do YOU know who are Rahne Sinclair or Sam Guthrie? Probably not, unless you're a fellow X-Nerd. The New Mutants doesn't even give them the courtesy of identifying who they are through a proper introduction. Most of them don't even exhibit their powers through most of the film. Sure, you're given hints and glimpses into what they might be capable but it's not enough to know what they're all about. While it does drop several easter eggs here and there for the true fans, they're so well hidden that most people won't even notice. Simon Kinberg was on record as saying that wanted something that resembled a mash of Stephen King and John Hughes-like horror set in a superhero world. While that sounds fantastic, it doesn't feel like, in this particular instance, it was successfully achieved. Unfortunately, during development, there were alot of script rewrites and several people who were set to join the film were either re-cast or dropped entirely. In the end, what we got was a generic pyschological horror film which was painted over with X-Men references and in the end, it just didn't feel right. It didn't work. It could have been so much better had they developed the idea some more.
In the end, if you're a fan of the Fox X-Men movies, you may choose to see this but I assure you that if you decide to skip it, you won't miss out on anything important to the overall X-Men franchise.
Project Power
(2020)
Stylish, Fast-Paced, Full of Action!
23 January 2021
Stylish, fast-paced, colorful, full of action. What's not to love? This is what New Mutants could have been. Project Power is an awesome movie that totally flew under my radar. With so much having happened in 2020, and the entire film industry on life-support, I had no idea that this film existed until it was recommended by Netflix. However, I'm glad I got to check it out. Project Power stars Jamie Foxx, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, and a brief cameo by Machinegun Kelly. The basic premise is that someone has developed a new drug that gives people random superpowers for 5 minutes at a time. These drugs are being used for both good and evil contributing to a wave of crime and chaos across the city of New Orleans. The writing, film direction, and acting are great. This could be the start of a great new franchise if done correctly. Highly recommended.
A Vigilante
(2018)
Olivia Wilde's Best Performance
21 January 2021
Olivia Wilde kicks ass in this movie. Plain and Simple. She does such a fantastic job; in fact, through this film she really changed my perception of her as an actress. I'm so used to seeing her in Rom-Coms, that at first, it seemed strange to me to see her in this serious dramatic role. She plays a hardened domestic abuse victim who has suffered tremendous loss and has swore to support other victims by any means necessary. She's sort of like The Punisher or The Equalizer, but without the cartoony super skills. She's not a living weapon with super fast reactions or Bruce Lee martial arts skills. If she punches something, she might break her knuckles. She bleeds. She feels pain. She's not impervious to anything, but she is determined in her mission. Overall the story is great. No complaints whatsoever. The violence is REALISTIC....for the most part. Except for that one part with the razor. You'll know what I'm talking about if you've seen it. I never felt lost or confused. Her character is so well-developed that she just strikes a chord with the viewers. In this day and age, her story is relatable. It's real life. People are actually living like this and experiencing these things. Her weakness is that her heart is too big. She doesn't want others to suffer like she has, and she goes to great lengths to relieve them of their pain sometimes to her own detriment. While her crusade is a noble one, she seeks to resolve her own issues by zeroing in on the source of her suffering and achieving her own brand of closure. In this regard, the film is both inspiring and utterly tragic and sad. There is no good to come out of the film. It's not an uplifting or inspiring tale but rather a study of the gross reality of domestic violence and its consequences on all those involved: the perpetrators, the victims, and their families.
You're not going to come out of this film throwing your fist into the air, and feeling triumphant. This isn't that kind of film. However, it's a very important story to tell, because it casts light on the suffering that we often overlook or ignore in this world. So if you're looking for a superhero-like revenge thriller, go watch something else. If you want a realistic character driven drama about the devastating consequences of domestic violence, a gritty slice of reality, consider watching A Vigilante.
You're not going to come out of this film throwing your fist into the air, and feeling triumphant. This isn't that kind of film. However, it's a very important story to tell, because it casts light on the suffering that we often overlook or ignore in this world. So if you're looking for a superhero-like revenge thriller, go watch something else. If you want a realistic character driven drama about the devastating consequences of domestic violence, a gritty slice of reality, consider watching A Vigilante.
Underwater
(2020)
Kirsten Stewart channels Ripley in this Tense Sci-Fi Thriller
21 January 2021
Kristen Stewart channels her version of Sigourney Weaver's Eleanor Ripley in Underwater. I had really high hopes for this film. After seeing the trailer, I got the impression that it was invoking Ridley Scott's claustrophobic high tension terror classic, Alien, except.....at the bottom of the ocean in the Mariana Trench. To some extent, it feels that way. There are definitely scenes that full of edge-of-your-seat tension and feel claustrophobic, invoking feelings of panic and anxiousness. However, at the same time, it suffers from several issues that are too great to ignore. I understand that it takes place aboard an underwater drilling station in the Mariana Trench, one of the deepest and darkest parts of the ocean, which is still largely undiscovered and probably full of wildlife we still have not fully identified yet. That is awesome. It's never been done before, as far as I can recall. Unfortunately, the story is not fully realized; frankly, it doesn't make much sense. You'll need to suspend your disbelief and just roll with it, but it's not so bad that you'll want to shut off the film. Some scenes are so dark that it's too difficult to even make out what's happening, and the heavy use of CGI, isn't consistent throughout. Sometimes it looks good, other times it looks like cartoons super-imposed over a scene of Kristen Stewart swimming in a pool. However, despite all that, it's still a great movie.
In fact, it's one of the best ones to cme out in 2020; certainly much better than anything Sy-Fy has made. While, again, it does have it's many flaws, it really is an entertaining film. Boring is not something that I'd associate with "Underwater"; not at all. Kirsten Stewart is a fantastic actress. She does a very good job of playing a badass heroine...and let's just get it out there: If Sigourney Weaver were to ever pass the torch to someone, I could definitely see Kirsten Stewart taking up the mantle.
In fact, it's one of the best ones to cme out in 2020; certainly much better than anything Sy-Fy has made. While, again, it does have it's many flaws, it really is an entertaining film. Boring is not something that I'd associate with "Underwater"; not at all. Kirsten Stewart is a fantastic actress. She does a very good job of playing a badass heroine...and let's just get it out there: If Sigourney Weaver were to ever pass the torch to someone, I could definitely see Kirsten Stewart taking up the mantle.
WandaVision
(2021)
A Strange Departure from Standard MCU but Well Worth It
19 January 2021
WandaVision is possibly, to date, the strangest entry into the MCU....and this is also the same MCU that gave us a gun-totting raccoon and a sentient tree. So far only 2 episodes have premiered and therefore not much is known about how exactly this connects back to the MCU films or how it continues following the events of the Avengers: Endgame. I have my hunches, but I'll keep them to myself for now. What I can say is that WandaVision appears to be a homage to the TV sitcom era of the 1960s and 70s. If you've ever watched the various syndicated shows on Nick at Night's roster (Bewitched, I Dream of Genie, Gilligan's Island, etc....), you'll find something completely relatable here as it hearkens to the golden age to TV Americana.
From the first moment of the first episode, it's not particularly clear what's going on. Wanda and Vision appear to be living in an idealized American suburb surrounded by friendly neighbors. Vision isn't hiding his identity as an Android but has the ability to change his appearance from the red-faced robotic superhero you saw in Avengers to a more normal looking man (Paul Bettany without make-up and prosthetics). However for those who are closely tuned in to the MCU, the series is giving plenty of clues and easter eggs about where it might be headed. What I can say is that this is a very refreshing change from your standard superhero action/adventures. It delves into the weirder part of Marvel Comics' lore but if you stick with it, I can assure you, that the pay off will be worth it.
From the first moment of the first episode, it's not particularly clear what's going on. Wanda and Vision appear to be living in an idealized American suburb surrounded by friendly neighbors. Vision isn't hiding his identity as an Android but has the ability to change his appearance from the red-faced robotic superhero you saw in Avengers to a more normal looking man (Paul Bettany without make-up and prosthetics). However for those who are closely tuned in to the MCU, the series is giving plenty of clues and easter eggs about where it might be headed. What I can say is that this is a very refreshing change from your standard superhero action/adventures. It delves into the weirder part of Marvel Comics' lore but if you stick with it, I can assure you, that the pay off will be worth it.
The Rhythm Section
(2020)
Invokes Luc Besson's Le Femme Nikita but is Utterly Boring
19 January 2021
The Rhythm Section is a borderline sub-average/average spy thriller. It is not particularly outstanding in any way whatsoever. In fact, the plot so very closely resembles the 1990 French film, Le Femme Nikita, directed by Luc Besson. Actually, it invokes Le Femme Nikita so much, that at certain points in the film you may question to yourself whether this is a remake. The problem with The Rhythm Section is that despite it's international locations, it lacks in any real entertainment, rather settling for generic and average genre-specific tropes. Throughout the course of the film, Blake Lively's character, Stephanie Patrick, goes through a transformation from a drug addicted prostitute to a globe-trotting international assassin but never once do I feel like she fully embodied her character; her performance mostly feels dull and hollow. Despite the film's attempts to build towards some ultimate climatic moment, we never actually get there. The ending is abrupt, meaningless, and anti-climactic and makes me feel bad for having wasted my time.
Night Hunter
(2018)
Tries too hard to be Se7en and Silence of The Lambs
19 January 2021
Ah, Night Hunter. Where to start? Well, throughout the course of the film, I found myself bouncing back and forth between thinking that Night Hunter was the best crime thriller since Se7en, to thinking that it was dumber than a bag of marshmallows. I would be astonished if it turned out that the writers of this film weren't inspired by Se7en or Silence of The Lambs. The intensity, style, and plot twists blatantly invoke those films. However, was it an homage or a rip-off? I'm still not quite sure. Night Hunter suffers from alot of problems; it's riddled with plot holes, poor writing, and while some actors did a great job (Cavill, Tucci), others (Daddario) did not and just weren't believable in their roles. When the film finally reaches it's climactic action scenes, and of course the obligatory plot twist, it just falls apart and becomes a convoluted mess. In the end, it really did just feel like a poor man's Se7en. However, for roughly an hour and a half, it'll entertain you if only you'd suspend your disbelief and overlook it's numerous flaws.
Overlord
(2018)
Gorey, Bloody, Brutal, and Really, Really Entertaining
19 January 2021
I had not seen nor heard anything about this film. To be frank, it was not on my radar at all but I took a chance on it and was so glad that I did. Overlord takes place during WW2 where a unit of American paratroopers are tasked with a mission to drop behind enemy lines in France to take out a jamming radio tower atop a church. Simple enough, right? Wrong. This is where the entire film takes a huge departure from you standard WW2 war movie. From the initial scene, it hits you with a long action sequence that is intensely terrifying. From there the atmospheric tension continues and never lets up throughout the film. What should be a routine military operation goes horribly wrong. Overlord gut punches you with over the top brutality, violence, and gore, but it is also immensely fun and entertaining. It feels likes an Episode of Tales from Crypt with a much bigger budget and that's exactly why I love it!
Body Cam
(2020)
Body Cam is an Intensely Creepy and Brutal Thriller
19 January 2021
Body Cam was fantastic. It won't win any awards but if you're looking for an creepy, tense, extremely brutal horror/thriller, you can't go wrong with this film. Body Cam was produced by BET Films and stars Mary J. Blige and Nat Wolff. It also features David Zayas who you might remember as Angel Batista from Dexter (he's since gone on to star in several other high profile shows such as Numb3rs, The Closer, Law & Order, CSI: Miami, Blue Bloods, and Quantico). The film is set to the backdrop of racial injustice due to violent actions perpetrated by the local police department in a dark and gritty city riddled with crime. From the very first scene it punches you with high tension and never let's up. Mary J. and Nat Wolff were great together, the writing and acting overall were very good. I was really impressed with Mary J. Blige's acting in Body Cam. She really did impress me. Again, while it won't hit mainstream radar, Body Cam is definitely a film to see atleast once. I could definitely see it achieving a cult following in the months to come. If you're a fan of atmospheric horror and mysterious thrillers, give this one a shot. You will not be disappointed.
Darkness Falls
(2020)
Despite it's Flaws, Darkness Falls Delivers
17 January 2021
To be honest, unlike other critics here on IMDB, I thought that Darkness Falls wasn't so bad for a B-movie action action thriller on a shoestring budget. The plot was pretty good and I thought that Shawn Ashmore, who you know as Iceman from the X-Men films, did a commendable job in the lead. He plays a detective suffering from PTSD due to the murder of his wife, whom everyone, except him, thinks was a suicide. Acting on his own accord without support from his precinct, he goes about to prove that it was in fact a murder and not a suicide, while trying to remain strong and composed for his son. The film starts out slow and goes through a long bit of character development before it gives you the action that you're seeking. When it does finally deliver, it's intense and very brutal. Despite some plot holes and incomprehensible story elements, it was an experience that was sad but ultimately satisfying.
The Lie
(2018)
An Annoying Frustrating Slow Burn Thriller
11 January 2021
This should be called "Family of Idiots: The Movie". I cannot for the life of me understand how this film was made. It has more holes than Swiss Cheese. The girl is a complete moron who is totally oblivious to the reality and consequences of her actions. Her parents, instead of doing the right thing, cry to themselves about being victims of circumstance while consistently digging themselves into a deeper an deeper hole as the film progresses. Then all of a sudden.....Blumhouse gives you a big slap in the face and makes you realize that the film you thought you were watching is in fact, not what you were watching. It's actually much worse. A groan of frustration and an "Oh my God are you kidding me??" was how I ended this slow burn psychological thriller. I experienced it, but I have no desire to do so again.
Love and Monsters
(2020)
A Fun Entertaining Post-Apocalyptic Rom-Com with the Cutest Dog EVER
7 November 2020
This film came out of nowhere. I hadn't heard anything about it, but I took a chance on it and I loved it! Love and Monsters was a really fun entertaining film. I really enjoyed the combination of romantic comedy and sci-fi/horror. It was well written, the acting was on point, and the film direction was very good. I really enjoyed the world-building in this film. The atmosphere and monsters were done very well. The post-apocalyptic world in this film is much different than in others where it's dark and murky. This film was bright and colorful and really showed that after 95% of humanity was gone, the environment took over un-restricted. Planes buried in mountains covered in vines, buildings overgrown with plants and trees, etc....It just looked really really good. Also....bonus points for having the cutest dog I have ever seen in my entire life! I think everyone who watches this is going to fall in love with that adorable brown puppy...and how could they not??? Great movie! Very well executed and definitely leaves you wanting more. I hope this is the start of something new!
2067
(2020)
Send Ethan Whyte!
19 October 2020
I'm not sure why everyone hated this movie. I admit that it's not a colossal big budget Sci-Fi like Blade Runner but as an indie film, it was damn good. Kodie Smit-McPhee was actually really good in this, contrary to everyone ranting about how terrible he was; he wasn't terrible. It was a good solid Sci-Fi film with a remarkable message about the state of the world and the devastation that the human race is causing to the eco-system. 2067 is a not a run and gun fast-paced shoot'em up type of Sci-Fi film and if that was your impression, I'm sorry that you're disappointed. This is more about one person's struggle with accepting his place in the world, and how his identity was shaped by the decisions of his family and himself. 2067 is a more emotionally driven humanistic type of Sci-Fi. While it ticks all of the boxes of what a film in this genre should be, it uses these stereotypical sci-fi themes to illustrate a story about a kid who lost his parents and suddenly found himself alone in a dying world. It goes through his struggles of self-identification, and recollecting his memories to understand the decisions that were made for him and the weight that those decisions would have on his future.
The backdrop is a world in 2067, which as been devastated by environmental destruction to the point that there is no longer any natural breathable oxygen. Ethan Whyte a city worker in one of the last existing urban colonies, relies on injections of artificial oxygen created by Chronicorp, a company that his father once worked for. This company, which is also developing a time machine to figure out how to send people to a better more sustained world, receives a message from 400 years in the future which simply states, "Send Ethan Whyte." This message has great implications as the experimental time machine cannot successfully return someone without having an anchor (a person) to activate it on the other side. This is the catalyst that sets off the film.
Overall, I thoroughly enjoyed it. Despite it's science fiction elements, on a humanistic and personal level, the struggles of Ethan Whyte are relatable. Kodie Smit-McPhee, a relatively young actor, did a phenominal job as did the supporting cast. The setting and, in particular, the musical score throughout the film were also very well done.
The backdrop is a world in 2067, which as been devastated by environmental destruction to the point that there is no longer any natural breathable oxygen. Ethan Whyte a city worker in one of the last existing urban colonies, relies on injections of artificial oxygen created by Chronicorp, a company that his father once worked for. This company, which is also developing a time machine to figure out how to send people to a better more sustained world, receives a message from 400 years in the future which simply states, "Send Ethan Whyte." This message has great implications as the experimental time machine cannot successfully return someone without having an anchor (a person) to activate it on the other side. This is the catalyst that sets off the film.
Overall, I thoroughly enjoyed it. Despite it's science fiction elements, on a humanistic and personal level, the struggles of Ethan Whyte are relatable. Kodie Smit-McPhee, a relatively young actor, did a phenominal job as did the supporting cast. The setting and, in particular, the musical score throughout the film were also very well done.
The Tax Collector
(2020)
This should have been a film about Creeper
30 September 2020
I had high hopes for The Tax Collector. I mean, look at that cool poster! I thought it was going to be something fast-paced, exciting, and full of action. I thought it was going to be something like Sicario, but I was wrong. David Ayer wrote and directed this crime drama about L.A. street gangs. Not unfamiliar territory for him; he did End of Watch, Training Day, Street Kings and the very first installment of the now blockbuster franchise, The fast and The Furious. So, theoretically, he should have been able to write and direct a really strong, really successful film in this genre. Unfortunately, that's not the case. The Tax Collector started out strong but at about 35 minutes in, it fell apart and I found myself extremely bored. The saving grace of this film is Creeper, played by Shia LaBeouf. He was dark, mysterious, ultra-violent and extremely interesting, but he was only a second fiddle to Bobby Soto's main character, David Cuevas, an enforcer turned rising crime boss in the LA gang scene. Had the film been mainly about Creeper, it would have been so much better.
Gulliver's Travels
(2010)
This Gulliver is a Slacker who likes Star Wars, Kiss, and Rockband.....
11 September 2020
Not exactly a film adaptation of the original classic story but rather a modernized pseudo-classical reimagination of the O.G. Gulliver's Travels wherein Gulliver works in the mailroom of some sort of corporation, ends up going on an assignment for some reason that defies logic (because your company's mailman always gets the important assignments, right?), and ends up in a tiny fantasy kingdom where people in blue are in the midst of a perpetual war with people in red. The film has it's funny moments mainly because it tries to inject pop culture references, present day puns, and jokes into the story. For instance, Gulliver is a slacker who plays Rockband, listens to KISS, and loves Star Wars and these references play heavily into some of the scenes of the film. Nevertheless, it's a family friendly comedy of sorts that is a bit longer than I'd like but still overall a pretty funny film that kids and adults alike will enjoy. Jack Black, as usual, is funny, awkward, and over the top but that's why we love him.
Bill & Ted Face the Music
(2020)
The Wyld Stallyns have been Tamed. This movie Stinks.
4 September 2020
Why was this movie made? Seriously? Why? Who was asking for it? On one hand it was nostalgic seeing Bill and Ted on screen together again in a new adventure, and using the old phone booth again. On the other hand, it wasn't funny at all. The plot was really dumb. The special effects were cheap and ridiculous. For a good demonstration of this check out the 🤖 murderbot that goes on the hunt for Bill and Ted 😉. In fact 95% of the future scenes are filmed in front of a green screen and the way that the actors flailed around made it clear that they weren't aware of what their surroundings were going to be after the CGI bits were added in. Overall, it's an abysmal horrible forgettable film. People are going to look back at everything that happened in 2020 and no one is going to remember that Bill & Ted part 3 came out because.......honestly, who cares? It was terrible but I guess Keanu Reeves showed interest and promised to do it years ago, and since he's stand up guy, he kept his promise, but seeing two dudes in their 50s going "dude, brah. righteous! Wooahhh!" etc...is eye rolling at best.
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