Change Your Image
swimfreakon_a_snowboard
Reviews
Gunpowder Milkshake (2021)
It wasn't terrible...
Kind of a disappointing PC female remake of John wick. And the uhh script, oh man it was so bad. Like it was about as clique as you can get. As a gay, a strong female lead is my favorite, so I thought I would love this movie. Unfortunately, this was more of a grumpy group of women who only did this movie because they were contractually obligated. And girl, honestly same, I'd be pissed too if that was the script I had to work with!
Intersect (2020)
The special effects were ok?
So I'm not really sure what the point of this movie was. There's an overly long lead up to... Idk, whatever happened at the end? If they had an ending that made sense, a script that wasn't horrible and actors that could actually act it could have been an ok movie... I like dumb scary movies but this really isn't worth watching unfortunately.
Tape 407 (2012)
I couldn't finish it
It felt like they were just told to argue and scream... And uh that's about all the direction they were given. Lol some of them kept tripping over their words while arguing and instead of reshooting they decided they couldn't do that? Maybe I'm wrong and the rest of the movie is amazing... But I couldn't get past 40 minutes because I was so bored...
The Secret of Skinwalker Ranch (2020)
STUUUUUUUPID
I was so excited to watch this show because I've read so much about the phenomenon of skinwalkers... however, this show is apparently ran by a bunch of idiots. The only intelligent person seems to be Travis, everyone else gets upset when he wants to actually do anything of scientific value. I was hoping that they wouldn't ruin the history behind the ranch but they literally made it laughable. I don't know who they're referring to when they talk about these "Professionals" but other than Travis, they definitely didn't include them in the show... You'll find better videos on Reddit, skip this for the love of God, it's a horrible boring waste of time that reveals nothing. Ughhhhh I can't get over how stupid it is!
47 Meters Down: Uncaged (2019)
Kind of fun albeit totally mindless
This honestly wasn't THAT bad of a movie... I mean it's pretty bad but if you can suspend literally any logic you might have it's entertaining... And I do mean ANY logic... AT ALL
The Recall (2017)
(mind-blowingly) Stupid teenagers are more dangerous than aliens...
Umm well the special effects and plot were ok... But good Lord these kids are DUMB and not in a running away at the wrong time kind of dumb but suicidally stupid.
Can somebody please make a movie like this with people who aren't trying to function with an IQ of 75... I'm pretty sure the kids in this movie were way more of a danger to themselves than the aliens were. Wesley Snipes was pretty entertaining though, he's really the only intelligent person in it. Honestly by the end of the movie you're wanting them all to die just so there's no chance of them reproducing.
The I-Land (2019)
I don't think I'm going to make it through the first episode...
This show is really bad, like really really bad... The script... Omg the script... How did this get green lit? Lol and the acting is horrid. I'm sorry I'm just so annoyed already, it really is that bad.
It Chapter Two (2019)
I loved it
So... I don't know where the negative reviews are coming from. I read the book like three times and I thought they did a great job with this. And to the people giving it bad ratings... I'd like to see you try and make a version of it that actually translates well to the big screen in a way that makes sense. There might not be a turtle or an endless abyss where IT comes from. But to put the books version of the ritual of chud, the turtle, and how they battle IT inside IT's mind, would literally make no sense.
The casting was perfect, Bill Hader deserves an award for his performance. If you don't like this movie then you probably won't like the actual book it was made from...
Crawl (2019)
Good until their IQ started to rapidly drop
I'm not really sure what happened... At first it was really good and had great jump scares along with keeping the atmosphere really tense. But then the script suddenly turned incredibly clique. I'm thinking maybe that they were in shock and that's why they lost any ability AT ALL to think rationally... It was still fun to watch but I wasn't expecting to actually end up laughing at how bad it turned out.
The Endless (2017)
Actually really good
I feel like this got bad reviews because people have no patience and need sex, murder, or explosions to keep them interested (don't get me wrong I love it too) even though a movie might actually be really interesting... As far as people not understanding it... Were we watching the same movie?
This isn't going to win an Oscar but if you like movies that make you think then I think you'll enjoy it. As far as it being boring... I'm of the belief that you can tell a story without someone dying or something exploding every five seconds. So no it's not action packed but it is a well done movie.
My Daughter's Disgrace (2016)
A little dramatic...
This was kind of ridiculous ESPECIALLY for college. For one thing there's no actual nudity... I see worse pictures then that on my friends Instagram feeds, that they put there on purpose. Also... Umm I'm pretty sure everyone would side with the woman, we've progressed a tiny bit from the 50's..
The Umbrella Academy (2019)
Amazing!
Other than number 1 being an idiot I loved this show. The acting was incredible, story line was well done, I loved pretty much everything about it!
The Order (2019)
WASTE. OF. TIME.
I was expecting something along the lines of Sabrina in terms of quality... This show seems to use special effects from the early 2000's... I couldn't even finish the first episode and I usually LOVE this kind of stuff. Characters had no depth, no back stories, no acting skills, no originality... Skip this one
Into the Dark (2018)
Flesh and blood was HORRIBLE
Wow... That was honestly one of the worst "horror" movies I've ever seen... Like cliche in the worst possible way... Ugh I'm so mad I watched that.
(Spoilers after this!)
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
The dad is bad... At acting, parenting, everything. You're basically just waiting a long time for him to finally kill someone. Then he dies she goes outside and it ends. Also when she drugs him out it takes like 2 hours to kick in... After he drinks the WHOLE bottle, and then tells her she should have given him a larger dose?!?! Ugh just don't waste your time.
Boy Erased (2018)
Hard to watch but absolutely incredible
As a gay man myself, this movie made me sooooo angry. Not because it wasn't made well, but it brought everything back up to the surface that I thought I was past. From growing up religious and believing that there was something wrong with him to the conversations he has with his father... It was like watching my life in a movie. Anyways, I highly recommend this movie, it's difficult to watch but it shows the reality that so many of us go through and are afraid to tell anyone.