Reviews

"At what point on the graph do "must" and "cannot" meet?" You may feel the need to turn your eyes and mind away from the screen many times while watching Robot Monster, but you just won't be able to. I guess in a sense, it puts you, the viewer in the same tragic predicament as Earth Ro-man. So does that make Phil Tucker a genius? Yes.

The dialogue, the acting, the "special" f/x, the message, the insanity, the stock footage of lizards fighting for no apparent reason...all these elements in a delicate balance make Robot Monster a must-see. Too bad it's in lousy 2-D.

One classic moment: The Hu-mans refuse to believe they are the only survivors left on earth, so Earth Ro-Man decides to taunt them sadistically, showing them footage to prove all humanity has been destroyed..."Want to know what has happened to your fellows?" he says. Man, he's a real jerk, but at the same time, you can't help but like him, just like the movie.

A Scientist and a young woman get married and immediately are harassed by the bride's young brother, whom you will likely hate almost immediately. Their honeymoon is short lived, as the scientist's new father-in-law calls him into action on the wedding night, not the kind of action he was looking for. It seems this man is the only one who can solve a problem plaguing the Korean people...a giant, angry, thunder lizard who has emerged from "the deep". I guess it's happened before, as most of the people know this Godzilla-like beast by his first name, Yongary.

Anyways, Yongary destroys a bunch of buildings, killing a bunch of people I assume, and ravages the Korean oil refineries, using the blow-torch in his mouth. We find out that he was only causing this ruckus because his tummy was growling, yes our boy Yongary was hungry. That pretty much covers most of the movie, other than a scene where he starts to dance, which makes it all worth watching (not really).

"Hey you, you with the teeth"...any film beginning with the incomparable Mr. T addressing you in such a way can safely be deemed a classic. If you haven't yet had the privilege of seeing "Be Somebody", your life is sadly incomplete. "T" solves all of the social ills plaguing, not just the youth of the 80's, but all of mankind in only 52 minutes; can you think of anyone else who could do that? The mere suggestion is "absiludicrous".

Parents, there is no doubt that you want your children to grow up to be somebody. Do them the ultimate favor, show them that you truly love them, and watch this video together as a family. Remember, if you don't, they may wind up being someone's fool.

I have finally had the Reptilicus experience,and it was far from disappointing. Once that frozen tail finally thaws out and regenerates, look out Copenhagen, this lizard dude is mad! (To his credit, he was awoken from quite a long nap, and most of us will admit that we can be quite cranky in such a situation). He wrecks everything, from farmhouses, to animated farmers ,to what I assume is Copenhagen's Chinatown...but who's the REAL monster in this film? General Grayson, that's who. Bullets do nothing to Reptilicus, except enrage him, but the brilliant General just keeps bussin caps until Reptilicus can't take it anymore. The result? All in the greater Copenhagen area feel his frustration. All in all, you won't regret watching this movie, especially the unsettling ending. "At least, there's only one of him" , eh General???

If you like unintentionally bad movies from the 50's, you will absolutely LOVE Teenagers From Outer Space. First of all, you pretty much know what you're getting with a movie that has "teenagers" and "outer space" in the title...this masterpiece offers some of the worst acting, plot, script and f/x you will ever see, and all rolled into one neat little package. There is enough action and stupidity to keep you interested all the way through. Notice the voiced-over (obviously human) barking of the dog Sparky (RIP) at the beginning, classic. Interesting too is the fact that the actor who played the ship's captain (the guy with, not one, but TWO v's on his astro suit) went on to become the original Ronald MacDonald. I'm lovin' it, and you will too.

I enjoyed watching this movie, but why did Karl have to take all that punishment? I mean, my man was a rookie on a mission to where Earth's Astromen had never been before, and was expected to shoulder the responsibilities of say, Don, the co-pilot on this fantastic voyage, who, as it turns out, is smooth like butta with the ladies. And what's with the one guy who dreams of, not women, but delicious apples? If you do decide to watch it, make sure you stay tuned for the closing credits, for you will hear one of the sweetest space ballads of all time.