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Reviews
Birdemic: Shock and Terror (2010)
Awful, boring load of truly amateur filmaking
My only regret is that I couldn't give this film 0 stars because it really doesn't deserve anything. After seeing a number of flicks making fun of this film I decided to see the whole thing & I truly regret it.
The Acting was awful, the lead character's only attribute seems to be the ability to stare at his crush and exclaim stupid lines with a bored face.
The directing was just as bad, pretty much nothing in Birdemic makes any sense what-so-ever and even saying that is a complement.
The special affects were truly abysmal. In fact the original classic the birds despite being mad many, many years before still has birds that are a trillion times more realistic that the trash in this film (and no that wasn't an exaggeration) They probably would have been better off using kindergarten drawings of chickens than what they used in the film.
No matter how unbelievably bad that was, the editing was the worst part of all. In fact I wouldn't be surprised if they didn't have an editor at all and just used every second of footage they shot. Endless boring scene takes place after endless boring scene, half this movie is the main character driving around in his car! The sound is just as bad, I've seen and heard better from 0$ budget High School films than this.
This movie is unbearably awful and boring, it's not like the room for example which is so bad it entertaining, this is just plain stupid. The Director Nguyen should never be allowed to make another movie, and although the film tries to use the noble themes of humanities dependence on fossil fuel and the need to save nature, nothing can save this. This movie is rightly considered one of the worst of all time, and my advise is to avoid it.
Shou da gui (1981)
your average cheap Kung Fu movie
This was the second "Cheap" Chinese Kung Fu movie after Fatal Flying Guillotines, previously I had seen allot of high budget modern Kung Fu movies, such as Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon, Fearless, and House of Flying Daggers, so my expectations were too high when i watched it.
The first time I watched it I was pretty disgusted and though it as the worst movie I had ever seen, however after watching it again two years latter and having watched allot more of the "Cheap" Kung Fu movies of the 70s & 80s I was allot less harsh, although I still believe it deserves no more than a 5 or 6. Here is a brief outline of the film:
The storyline is nothing original, your average story that some guy has most of his family murdered by a Santa-Claus looking Kung Fu expert, our protagonist then goes to find another Kung Fu expert (or in this case two), learns Kung Fu, gets strong than extracts revenge on the Santa-Claus look alike, in this case played by Lung Fei. The protagonist played by Wang Tao is victimized because his family hold the secret were this vast Treasure is. Almost every character talks about the treasure in the movie although ever really happens and you never see the "Treasure". The director tries to add some spic to it by having a random seductive killer ghost make an appearance midway through the film and a humorous beggar accompany the protagonist, but neither really help much. This film is Unintentonally funny due to the poor dubbing and even poorer sound effects, most notably when the Santa-Claus looking antagonist slaps to death one of his henchmen for unexplained reasons, each slap accompanied by an odd laser like noise. The Kung Fu is alright, and some of the scenes that this movie are filmed at are actually quit nice, such as the bamboo forest and waterfall scenes. In the end the dubbing and storyline prevent you from taking this film seriously, I wouldn't really recommend it to any one unless you want to laugh at its poor production, but there have been allot worse.