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chulacita
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Oldboy (2013)
***SPOILER ALERT*** This is not the movie I thought I was going to watch based on the trailer!!!
******MAJOR SPOILAGE ALERT******* First off, if you haven't seen the movie yet, then don't read any further because this post has a lot of spoilers. Of course, if you haven't seen the movie yet and you're not sure if you want to see this movie and want to know more about it from the "layman's point of view" without all the fancy shmancy smarty-pantsie movie buff stuff then keep reading so you don't waist 104 minutes of your life like I did; unless of course you're like me who had nothing better to do on a Friday night but be a cheap date with an old friend and extremely grateful it only cost me $2 to see this movie and even then I wanted a refund!
*** Still spoiling ***
The trailer looked intense and I was really excited to go see this action movie gone a rye and find the answer to why did they lock this hottie up? Come to find out it's this billionaires sick and twisted game of revenge he plays out on a bully from his teenage years. If you're into incest and think that you can "romanticize" the idea of that kinda of "love" then this movie is for you. Otherwise skip it and be thankful you stopped reading this at the first mention of incest.
**** Can't stop spoiling yet ****
Halfway through the movie I was thinking what's up with this nurse chick and why is she so interested in Joe, the main character. Since this has to do with conspiracies of someone who could actually afford to keep a man locked up and away from the world for 20 years, make a homemade movie on a made-up TV set designed solely for one purpose, this movie begs you to stay until the end to find out the why of it all.
***** If you got this far down this review then you know it's all a huge SPOILER ALERT ****
I knew this guy was locked up for 20 years so the first opportunity of flesh being presented to him, freely, you just know he's going to take it! And take it he did! I had a feeling that he should have resisted and well folks, he didn't. He didn't hesitate and the little ex-junkie couldn't wait to find a "daddy" so to speak to fix that "itch". Sic! I know, huh? I mean Bruno Mars's banging like Gorillas has nothing on this daughter and pop duo, sic! You see these two get busy with their pretty bodies and you think awww how wonderful they get to enjoy themselves but then come to realize later in the movie, it's major EWWWW and I almost threw up! I felt so sick of what I had just seen and putting two and two together makes you realize, OMG!!! Why did I just sit through all that. What's done was done, I had been a witness to this travesty and led by the nose of "guess who" and this is why not knowing who you sleep with is a bad idea.
I couldn't wait for this movie to be over and I resisted leaving early because what is known to be taboo was presented in a way that it was oops oh by the way we're related! So backwoods and inbred hatred come to mind but at the same time, what can you do? I was tricked in to an action movie with a major plot twist I had no idea was coming. Well done Spike Lee, which is why I gave it three stars out of 10 stars.
The action on this bad boy was so violent that it's a wonder why I haven't gone berserk myself, fueled from the hatred and need for revenge and vengeance! The fact the fight scenes were somewhat laughable in a psychotic kind of way, I will never look at my box cutter the same way, nor salt for that matter, lol. I was so happy when that Asian chick got her throat slashed close to the end because she's just as f'd up as the crazy billionaire scum. Anywho, not bad for a $2 whore of a movie and stale, slightly burnt popcorn. This movie taught me a lesson to NOT see a movie without researching the reviews first!
***** You have now been spoiled out my reader! Now go see it for yourself if you are brave enough to "experience" it yourself and get down right spoiled on ;-) *****
Movie 43 (2013)
OMG!! I can never get back the wasted time of my life during this movie!
If I could put a negative score on this movie I would! It's so sad that I can't get back the wasted time I spent on watching this movie!! I almost asked for my money back and some compensation for ruining my evening but I didn't pay for it. This movie is like being mind raped for it's run at racism, incest and bestiality. I hope that I will never experience a movie like this for as long as I live. With that said, there were topics and views that I could not avoid laughing my a** off about. All things taboo were exploited and a bit down right disgusting. I can't wait to wash the *ick off. The only real comedy I found was the soon to be famous scenes about Halle Berry and the blind date guacamole fiasco. These actors must be really struggling and strapped for cash in order to degrade themselves in this level of depravity that this movie depicts. I was disheartened to find some of my favorite actors in this film, to which I now look down on them with shame. I understand times are tough but jeez, have a level of class and a sense of morals. Obviously, they can get away with just about anything in Hollywood if a production company was willing to make this movie and foot the bill for these overpaid actors.
Yelling to the Sky (2011)
Yelling to the Sky should be titled tips on staying sane in the hood
This movie portrayed a clean version of trying to stay sane in the hood and learning to live with an alcoholic father. Through Hollywood there are many movies you may see that glamorize hood life, but so many few can capture the coexistence and survival of the family part of it like this movie has. The optimistic ending gives me hope for the character portrayed in this movie that she can and will live a very productive life despite the dysfunctional family setting. All too often a dysfunctional lifestyle mixed with drug use and alcohol is a death sentence, however this movie shows that it's never too late to change and turn yourself around inspite of your surroundings and upbringing. This movie gives me Hope and related to me so much in my real life that it's almost scary. Thanks for allowing me to post this and I hope I didn't spoil it for you. You just gotta see it to understand what I'm saying... Enjoy!