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Reviews
Steel Sharks (1997)
why do they bother making films like this?
i'll be honest i only picked this up 'cause Busey was in it...usually like his roles, but i don't think I've ever seen an actor wing it in like Gary did here. Every single scene he's in he stands emotionless reading off his lines, an easy pay-day for Gary is suppose but sheer torture for his fans.
this film is basically a crap submarine rescue film, nothing interesting happens, the action is tame, the story is child like, the acting unspectacular.
avoid this forever, even if your a Gary Busey fan please do not watch this.
why do they bother?
Saw (2004)
idea great, visually great, acting abysmal!
whilst this is a very cool little original movie, there is no way after 12,000 votes it deserves a 7.5 on here, Cary Elwes performance and the dialogue totally ruins this potentially classic film.
i watched this again last night and it's flaws just killed it, the way the two guys just suddenly remember things is just total nonsense, and the movies dialogue seems like it was written by children.
it made me angry cause this could have been so good, it's just a cool idea for a film, and visually it's fantastic but the dialogue and acting just ruin it.
Cary Elwes, what the hell was you thinking!?
Sweepers (1998)
horrible generic movie, but kinda watchable
my dad came home one day with a DVD double feature, he'd paid a £1 for it and it feature two Dolph films, Bridge of Dragons and Sweepers. Needless to say i was happy, i love b-style action movies and my dad had just picked up two potential winners.
Bridge of Dragons for the record was pretty good, not a classic but a fun action movie.
Sweepers however was a huge letdown, it starts brightly enough the whole opening scenes on the minefield are pretty cool and after the 'Roadhouse' style bar-fight scenes i thought i was in for a good time...then it all goes wrong. It's hard to pin-point what's wrong with this film, it's a basic story easy enough to follow and there's come decent action, it's just so stale and normal it makes me sick.
i find it hard to understand why people make films like this, what were they trying to achieve? generic pap overall, but still it was watchable...if your a Dolph fan, check it, if not avoid.
3/10
Pet Sematary II (1992)
grab a beer (or 10), sit back and enjoy
first things first, don't watch this film with anticipation of seeing 'the sequel' to Pet Semetary, forget it's even meant to be a sequel, just watch it as stand-alone movie.
there's not much to be said, i found this extremely entertaining, it's just a crazy, gory, fun movie. The bike death is very sick, but they throw comedy in there with it.
Gus The Zombie definitely deserves a place in Zombie-movie history, very funny.
If you like OTT movies that don't take themselves too seriously, give this a viewing, it's a riot.
Half Past Dead (2002)
nice fun movie
perfect weekday evening guy movie...
there's not much else to say other than this film is a lot of fun, there's some great action sequences, some comedy, a seriously hot chick and a simple-easy story line to follow and enjoy. Anyone who bought/rented this expecting anything else is going to be disappointed, and rightfully so, what the hell were they expecting.
this was never gonna change the world, but for a few quid of your money it's worth the 94 minutes.
one of the better 'recent' Seagal movies too, he puts in his usual dry as the dessert good guy performance.
6/10.
Starship Troopers 2: Hero of the Federation (2004)
a film of two halves
i picked this film up cheap on DVD not long ago, mainly down to the fact that the 1st movie was a blast, mindless gory sci-fi fun...iwas pretty much hoping the sequel would provide the same thrills...did it? yes and no let me say, the first half of this movie is pretty dire, it involves the small fleet of soldiers trying to fend off the bugs from a base they've taken refuge in, whilst there they release a prisoner (+ expert soldier) who was kept at the building. It's all kinda crap, bad acting, no real story, it's all abit boring. I thought at this point id be flogging this DVD on ebay as soon as it finished, then...
the 2nd half of this movie friggin rules, a story starts to unfold and the gore levels go through the roof. Suddenly this film is a lot of fun...some of soldiers you see are affected by bugs, and they who are want to infect the rest of the crew, queue some really cool special effects and some bloody death scenes and this film has suddenly been saved. Avoid the ridiculous OTT heroic ending and you'll be OK.
still this ain't gonna be for everyone, i think some people will give up on it in the first half hour, but don't! hae patience with it and you might start to enjoy this film as much as i did.
7/10...fun gore, cheese, fun!
C.H.U.D. II: Bud the Chud (1989)
A Cult Classic!
awww man, i can't believe i found this film again.
i remember back when i was around 10, this film was on TV over in the UK i never saw it all but i always remember the final swimming pool scene, it kinda scared me at the time and i always remembered the CHUD name. So imagine my surprise when recently i searched through amazon and came across CHUD II on DVD for a measly £3, i couldn't resist. What i didn't know was that the film i was getting was the one i'd seen all them years ago, i thought it was sequel to what i had seen.
This is a great film, it ain't gonna appeal to everyone but if anyone loved cheesy 80's movie horror film this is a must-see, it's actually more of a comedy than a horror, but there's zombies in it so i guess it's a horror.
The star of the film is Bud, the main CHUD zombie you get caught on his quest to find the love of his life, Katie. He munches on a lot of people along the way and finally confronts her in the final scenes, which is actually quite sad and almost brought a tear to my eye (no s**t).
If anyone's up for a good laugh and loves zombies get this film, it's great entertainment and funny as hell, all the people on here who voted this a '1' need to lighten and start to enjoy life, cause this was some funny s**t.
The only gripe i have is the movie's lack of gore, if they'd totally bloodied this up and made it a bit more hardcore this would be amazing.
GET IT!