fibulator777's Reviews

Fate: The Winx Saga (2021–2022)

1/10

Filled with children having sex, drugs, and drinking

16 February 2024

Title pretty much sums up the show.

The acting ranges from poor to fair.

The writing ranges from poor to fair.

The overall story is fair.

The cinematography is good.

Special effects are pretty good.

The kids are supposedly 16-17... but the actors look mid-30's.

"Greeting fellow kids" meme hitting hard.

The individual characters are all insufferable in their own unique and unpleasant way. You have the inane prattle of the chatterbox, the "I'm better than everyone" main character *AND* princess *AND* main male character. The "I'm a raging sack of ***" "best friend". The "Obviously evil" new girl...

I can see why this was cancelled.

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Monarch: Legacy of Monsters (2023– )

4/10

Decent story, terribly telling of that story

10 February 2024

So, there's two setting, about 70 years apart.

In the past, the story is NOT told sequentially, so, unless you write down the dates, it's impossible to tell *when* something is happening.

"Past" Actors are decent enough. Store is decent enough.

Present: Story is marred with terrible writing, terrible acting, and terrible settings.

The writers have clearly never been to any place cold. The scenes in North Alaska were ludicrous. "OMG I'M FREEZING TO DEATH"... but not even wearing the hood up on her jacket? When there's snow, there's no night/day cycle. And they are woefully unprepared for arctic weather.

The desert driving scenes are terribly fake. Like something you'd expect from movies made in the 50's.

The 3 "kids" are horrible actors, and their characters are poorly written.

They blew their entire budget on the CGI monsters, which look spectacular. But these creatures are not enough to carry the show.

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Chrono Trigger (1995 Video Game)

3/10

What game did I play?

8 January 2024

I've heard about the hype surrounding this game for decades, but never played it until recently. And this is the most overhyped gamed I've ever come across.

Reviews like "great story", "Amazing story", "thought provoking" makes me wonder WTF game did they play?

Story is mid at best, not thought provoking in the slightest. Combat is on the dull side, but not the worst. Combat is dull. Story is dull. Characters are forgettable.

I loved the old FF series and most of the old Dragon Warrior series, and still play retro games now and then. Some of the new 'retro' games I like, some I don't. Chronotrigger is on the weak side.

Is it terrible? No.

Is it good? No.

Is it worth buying? NO.

Is it worth trying out if you happen to have it laying around? Sure.

I think the people who reviewed this game played it 20+ years ago as a kid and have fond memories... cause there simply wasn't much around back then to play.

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Disenchantment (2018–2023)

1/10

Not funny, Not interesting, poorly paced.

11 November 2023

It's bad, really bad. The pacing is *awful*, even within a "joke". They tell the jokes in a slow pace, often adding odd pauses, or not adding one where they should. It's like the Bicentennial man telling jokes, but instead of rapid fire and being funny, it's at 1/50th the speed and just odd. Watched as much as I could stand, before the pi** poor voice acting (Dull and lifeless for most of it) made it unbearable.

It's just one dull, lifeless joke/jab after another without even the tiniest spark of humor or joy. So dull, I couldn't even tell you the name of a single character.

I'd watched Futurama and loved it, saw the similar animation style and thought it'd be of comparable quality. It's not. It's a dumpster fire.

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Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse (2023)

3/10

Did I watch the same thing as everyone else?

26 August 2023

I'm trying to figure out how anyone gave this a 10. It's not even a movie... it's a non-stop slew of cameos, with no actual plot.

The stop-motion animation detracts significantly from quality, to save on $$ by rendering fewer frames. Mix in *way* too much hand-doodles of the same quality that parents hang up on their fridge. Throw in an extra *extra* helping of comic book cut-out seizure inducing flashes. It's a hodge-podge puddle of goop that says nothing and goes nowhere.

It's got *some* interesting bits, and some funny bits... but nothing that holds it all together.

This should have been a TV series, not a movie without a plot/ending.

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The Secret Kingdom (2023)

1/10

Child has psychotic break over trauma

31 July 2023

Some parts were average, but most were bad.

Starts out going *WAY* overboard making sure you know the main character is weak, pathetic, and severely mentally ill. Took several minutes to get out of the car... Mother's fake french accent is abysmal.

All human actors are pathetically bad.

Script is trash... ChatGPT without any editing.

The CGI models: Some were really good, some were pretty good, and a couple were kinda bad.

However: MOST of the animation was gut wrenching. Oddly, the animation for the main companions was *worse* than random stuff in the background.

There's a "fight scene" if you can call it that. Mechanical things are *clearly* not animated in the same room as their opponent. They do not attack. They just walk towards their opponent and randomly call into pieces for no apparent reason. You can see the swipes from the other guy... hits 3, they crumble... misses 10 more... but they crumble any way.

Entire movie was "go to location, look around, find piece with extreme ease, repeat".

This movie was written by a 9 year old, for 9 year olds, and acted by 9 year olds.

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The Flash (I) (2023)

4/10

Should have named it "Not-the-flash"

21 July 2023

I mean really, every bit of the story was about anything other than the flash. All the other characters stole the show, and The Flash was a low-level side-kick in his own friggen movie.

CG was a HOT MESS. It was all over the place, from a -10 to a +10. It ran the full gambit.

Pretty much the entire movie was about Batman and Superman's *already told* movies with a "what if" thrown in... ya know, like the entire series Marvel did named "What if"... that showed a bunch of different timelines.

This felt more like a plot-hook to cash in different DC universes with different actors playing the main roles, than it did a Flash movie.

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The Ark (2023– )

1/10

Writer has no concept of science, nor how to write

27 June 2023

What in the Heck is this trash?

So many abysmally wrong things BEFORE they even show the intro... Then there's the CGI straight out of 90's film school. Even children's shows are this bad... and haven't been in over a decade.

Characters are horrific cliches, and the actors are using gut-wrenchingly fake accents.

"All your muscles atrophied to the point that you can't move" -> Second later show a guy that is JACKED... and can't move.

Spinning ring habitat part breaks off... and Goes *AGAINST* it's momentum to jump INTO the ship.

They are so stupid they put *all* of their top leadership, top engineers, top scientists, FOOD, Water, and water reclamation all in the same pod... The one that got destroyed by the magic momentum defying ship part.

Another pod was being "crushed"... for no reason whatsoever.

And the Extreme cliche characters were incredibly cringe-worthy... combined with horrific actors.

Some say "It gets better"... I shouldn't have to sit through 4+ hours waiting for it to be less bad.

10's are fake. Anything 7+ are fake. There's no way it could go from a negative 7 to a positive 7.

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Good Omens (2019– )

4/10

Started funny, then went downhill

26 April 2023

First few episodes were funny, but after that, they simply weren't. The series didn't really have anything going for it beyond being a comedy. Main two characters were OK to watch... the rest were pretty boring, esp 'Adam' and his friends (terrible child actors). The overall plot wasn't worth watching.

It wasn't terrible. It's something to watch if you're *really* bored and have nothing else left to do.

I keep looking at the 9 and 10 rating and wonder what type of chemicals they ingested before watch the series. Perhaps some paint fumes were lingering from a freshly painted chair? Maybe a can of varnish left open?

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Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania (2023)

7/10

WTF did they do to Evangeline Lilly?

20 April 2023

Why did they think it was a good idea to put such a nasty wig on Hope and make her looks so incredibly old? When she first came on screen I didn't recognize her, and thought it was ant-man's grandmother.

I have aunts in their 80's that look younger than she did in this film. And that dead cat on her head detracted from every scene she was in to a catastrophic degree.

"Your so big!".... No, you're still smaller than an atom. -_-

This movie def isn't a great start to phase 5. It is a good movie, but nowhere near the standard set by MCU within the last 5 years. Antman isn't strong... isn't smart... isn't even likeable. He's a blundering buffoon that isn't funny either.

And the radical inconsistencies are irritating. Previous movies "you always have the same mass"... so it's a 200lb guy fighting stuff 1/1 trillionth his weight. The tiniest flick would obliterate.

The setting was pretty cool, the creatures were unique and interesting, yet under played.... extremely human-centric.

Combat was very... samey. Antman really only has two gimmicks, grow and shrink.... that's it. And good thing the pim particles... shrink... pim particles. -_-

If you can get past those negatives, it's a pretty, decent movie. I'm just floored that they let Evangeline Lilly on set with that disgusting dead cat on her head.

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Finnick (2022)

1/10

10's are fake

10 February 2023

This is trash. The only "10" review says the 1s should rate on quality.

1 *is* rating the quality. The animation is really off for most of the characters, the 'story' if you call it that is stupid. I was hoping for "stupid fun" type movie... and didn't even get that. Was hoping to even get interesting fuzzy things to watch... nope. Nothing about any of the characters was even mildly interesting. The fuzzy character models were created well, but poor animated. The human characters are *very* low budget "jimmy Neutron" style, poorly animated. The main character and Finnick was the only ones that were well animated. The contrast in quality was jarring.

I couldn't make it past the 30 minute mark, bored to tears.

10's are utterly fake. This is bottom of the barrel garbage.

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Monster Hunter Stories 2: Wings of Ruin (2021 Video Game)

3/10

Up for a rousing game of paper-rock-scissors?

4 February 2023

Have you ever wanted a rousing game of Paper-Rock-Scissors, where you know ahead of time what the other guy is gonna pick?

Ya, that's this game.

This would have made for an excellent Anime series. But a game it does not. There's no reason to even fight 95% of the stuff out there, no reason to loot stuff off the ground nor pick up chests. This leads to nothing but *really* long runs to each successive boss. The fights are mostly paper-rock-scissors. I essentially never use items nor skills, just basic attacks that cancel the monsters ability to attack.

I'm gonna try to finish out the rest of the game, but at the 20 hour mark it's pretty boring.

Game looks incredible. I enjoy the story, and the storytelling is great. Vivid and unique armors and weapons... but combat is just incredibly dull.

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Hellbound (2021– )

4/10

All backstory, no plot

20 January 2023

The title really says it all. The entire series felt like "world building" with things just happening. Granted, the world building is interesting, with the cult springing up in the middle.

They had every chance to have a plot... This great cataclysm happening one person at a time... but no one seeking the truth... no one seeking a way to stop it. Everyone just accepts it, like lambs to slaughter.

The *extreme* overly dramatic "acting" characteristic of South East Asian films is ever present, though much more subdued than previous years, but still off-putting.

The CG was decent, story non-existent, storytelling was decent (for 'background').

Overall, mediocre, but decent time waster if you're bored.

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Star Trek: Prodigy (2021–2024)

10/10

Best Star Trek Series to date.

15 January 2023

I love most of the different Star Trek series, Voyager *was* my favorite, now this one is.

I was binge watching, and after the first two episodes I thought I had misread the title, and it was really Star Wars. One of the guys straight up looked like he was going to force grab something out of a crate... Villain is very clearly a Sith Lord. Art style clearly carbon copy of Star Wars animated series.

Once they get to the Star Trek part, it gets *much* better. I was floored at the quality on all aspects, art, direction, story, storytelling. It was fun, colorful, and engaging.

And Rok is my favorite character, she's such a doll. ^_^

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Andor (2022– )

3/10

"Story" is a haphazard cluster F'

10 January 2023

Production quality: High, everything looked right. The scant amounts of CG was incredible.

And here's where it falls apart, story/storytelling. I normally separate these two, because how a story is told is as important as the story itself. However, in this situation the story is such a hot mess of randomness, I have no idea if the story was terrible, or the story-telling.

Starts out with some dude on some planet doing some things. I know this is prequel to Rogue 1, but it's been nearly a decade since I saw that movie. Ok, so the dude is boring and generic and mumbles... can't understand a word he says. I also lipread... and he does NOT move his lips when he speaks. I can understand him just fine in Rogue one... But not in Andor. Speaking which, I didn't even know that was his name until Episode 6... I thought Andor was a planet. It just hops around from random clip of some event to another.

The sound balance is *way* off... the music and sound effects are thunderous and voices are like whispers (most of the time, part of the time it's just fine), this makes it incredibly difficult to follow what they are saying when they aren't looking directly into the camera (or in the case of the main actor, not moving their lips)

This is a prime example of how *not* to do storytelling/sound balance/acting.

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The Thirteenth Floor (1999)

3/10

Nostalgia got me on this one

20 December 2022

I had fond memories about this one from my youth. When I went back to watch it again... wow was the acting bad. Special effects was non-existent, and the premise was stupid beyond belief. The "plot" (or overall concept) was interesting, which is probably why I thought fondly of it.

But the premise of "Oh, we're going to move your consciousness" is absurd *and* incredibly stupid on so many levels. Namely "dying in game is dying in real life". No one would ever design a system like that, nor would you have to. All you'd need is to read/write to the brain, specifically the 5 senses and motor cortex. And you'd control your character (and see/feel) through thought, instead of keyboard and mouse. But what's even dumber is "moving the AI into the person". Why? There's no need to move it at all... This point is just kick to the face bad. (which even in '99 I knew was wrong) I guess back then I wanted movies like this to exist so badly I overlooked all the really bad stuff.

Why 3 stars if it's so bad? Because it's still better than most of the trash put out these days that I reserve for 1 and 2 star. Not saying all things today is trash... just saying today's trash is just that much worse than this movie.

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Ainbo (2021)

4/10

Written for 4 year olds, by 4 year olds

4 December 2022

The title is the best way to describe this movie.

The main character says she's 13... but voice sounds like a 4 year old. She acts like a 4 year old, sounds like a 4 year old, speaks like a 4 year old, moves like a 4 year old. And everyone talks to her like she's 4 year old. She toddles around like a barely developed 4 year old. Her dialog and speech patterns... 4 year old. It's like watching Dora: the Explorer, or blues clues.

It's like the original script and voice acting was done with the intention that the main character was 4 years old... but for some reason swapped the character model with that of a 13 year old.

It's *barely* watchable for adults... and probably boring for preteen+. Toddlers and small children would probably like it.

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Guardians of Time (2022)

1/10

Worst CG and Story I've seen in many years

2 December 2022

So, the story seems absurdly simplified. If it were a book, it's age group would be 7-9 year olds. The "bad guy" never even attacks... he just stands there and asks politely for the magic rock that ends the universe, a couple times. Everything about the movie was *ultra* low effort. CG was *terrible*, and you could tell they were on a greenscreen the whole time. Like the greenscreens that pod-casters use... The acting was poor, but not terrible. Story was childish... like written by a 9 year old for 9 year olds. Dialog and plot was just pathetic.

It's watchable, if you're bored, but don't expect anything of even "barely acceptable" quality.

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She-Hulk: Attorney at Law (2022)

2/10

Umm... WTF is this supposed to be?

2 November 2022

I can't tell what genre this even supposed to be?

Comedy? Fails utterly.

Drama? Nope SuperHero? Terrible Coherent story? Not really Law? That's comedic...

It's got a dabble of all of the above, while failing at each, it never really goes anywhere, nor is it entertaining.

The only thing it has going for it is the cameo's... and they KNOW IT... they brought it up in one of the episodes!

The CG is usually good, but every once in a while it's very bottom of the barrel.

Watch it if you're bored... I guess? Just lower your expectations to essentially nothing. It's not horrific, it just isn't good.

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Pantheon (2022–2023)

10/10

Great story, less than great story telling.

1 November 2022

So, the story is pretty good, with some lines that are near perfect quotes to articles I wrote about the future Neuralink many years ago. Main difference between Pantehon's fictional tech and Neuralink is, with sufficient understanding of the brain, there's no need to destroy it to make a functional copy... or millions. One could take the 1000 greatest minds of each field, make 1,000 copies of each, and run them at a speed 1,000,000 times "real time"... the level of technological development at that point grows as an all new exponential rate, as the design physical equipment to all themselves to fun at even faster and faster rates. This tech would be obsolete before even the first prototype could be built. Billions of years of technological evolution per second, every second, in every possible field, with an ever increasing rate, as the new equipment is applied to the digitized copies of people.

And those speeds are not with server farms... they are possible on high-end home PCs.

All this, without killing the original. And with Neuralink, one can create a Full Dive System, AKA "Matrix" interface. One can not only be anyone, and do anything... they can *be* anything. They could experience the existence of a chair, or a rock, or a kitchen sink... any animal, real or imaginary. These experiences could be recorded, translated, and played back for others. Limitless experiences with no downside (except possibly boredom and/or addiction... but that's like being addicted to happiness...). I've already started up the company that will bring this forth by the year 2040. It would be faster, but I have to wait for Neuralink... and they have to wait for the insanely slow FDA process.

The pacing of the show starts off abysmally slow, and works it way up to barely acceptably slow. Then entire series would make a good 90 minute movie... not so much for a 5 hour runtime series. First episode could just be thrown away... next couple have approx 1 hour of showing a guy yawning and dropping a pen, over and over.

I can't wait to make this show a reality.

*Edit* Season 2 was exceptional.

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Mia and Me: The Hero of Centopia (2022)

1/10

Very poor animation

11 October 2022

The 3D models are very low budget, and I haven't seen animation this bad in a very long time. When speaking the teeth just go up and down randomly, and the lips stay exactly with the teeth. It's like some flip-top head puppet thing going on. These are some zero-effort models and animation. Not really fit for feature film. This might be acceptable for a 3 year old's Saturday morning kids show.

I just couldn't get past how bad this was, so can't really speak about any other aspect of the 'movie'. I'm an amateur, and I've done better on my own, so a paid professional should be able to do better.

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I Am Groot (2022– )

3/10

Groot as a bully.

21 September 2022

They are cute, but incredibly short (2.5 minutes each)... with no real point to them, whatsoever.

The animation and character model for Rocket in the last episode was... abysmal.

Each episode portrays Groot as a bully, attacking anyone weaker/smaller than himself.

WTF, When did they put a character minimum limit on reviews? Why can I just say what *I* want to say, nothing more, nothing less? Instead I have to put a paragraph of filler in just to fulfill some arbitrary quota. Seriously how much can one say about a 2.5 minute short with only 1 character... that doesn't speak? Phew, got my character quota!

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Obi-Wan Kenobi (2022)

5/10

It was ok, but felt like something was missing.

17 August 2022

Warning: Spoilers

It was mildly entertaining, but throughout it just felt... off.

For starters: The entire premise is canon destroying... The empire knows that senator Ortega is connected with the rebels... and doesn't do anything about it? Really? That connection is why Leah was kidnapped.

Then they portray Obi-Wan as some feeble old man, barely capable of walking. I *really* hate when they make movies/shows about extremely powerful characters as old and enfeebled.

Then the writing was really bad... Leah's actress is like 5 or something, or is unusually small, and physically handicapped. She toddles. She looks and moves like a 5 year old. I was FLOORED when she said "I'm 10". Which makes here character make no sense. Why is a 10 year old so... bratty and immature? Immature in personality like that of a 5 year old.

So, with that, grown men were chasing her and having such a hard time catching a '5 year old that can barely move'...

More bad writing: Vader beat Obi, he's unconscious... and OH NO, there's a tiny bit of fire between them. Vader's in an environmental suit (Storm troops aren't wearing armor... as seen by *everything* penetrating them... they are wearing suits to protect from heat and cold.) He could walk through the fire... around the fire... Jedi-jump over the fire... Force pull Obi through the fire... any number of things... but nope. He just stands there dumbfounded as a Loader bot *SLOWLY* carries Obi off.

More: 3rd Sister could just walk up and open the big steel door with her light saber (which she does *much* later)... but nope... they "shoot" the door that doesn't budge... not the rock the door is embedded in... nope... the door.

Oh... and Vader doesn't block the HUGE GAPING escape door in the top, that's far more visible than the hidden side door they are trying fruitlessly to blast.

It's like they aren't really trying. The bad guys "want" him to escape, over and over and over again. Like when there magically appeared a 2nd ship for everyone to be on... when there *clearly* was only one in the hanger, and only one that took off, only one in the scene the entire time. And Vader *easily* dropped the first... but didn't bother trying for the 2nd? Lol...

The list goes on and on of "you're not even trying" bad writing.

Then they make some new scenes with Anakin... and the actor aged *horrifically*, dude look 70... Should have went with CG, or cut the scene entirely if you couldn't do make-up to make him look the age he was supposed to be.

The CG is great, the acting is pretty good... the rest is very half-hearted, lazy mess. It's even more pronounced with compared with how good Mandalorian is.

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Sonic the Hedgehog 2 (2022)

6/10

Too much silly just to be silly.

4 August 2022

I watched the 2 hour version, and they could easily cut half an hour of 'silly just to be silly' and make the movie better. Cut the entire 'dance off' out... and trim down the irrelevant side stories. They made the movie worse, not better.

A good edited version would get a 7.5 from me.

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Star Trek: Strange New Worlds (2022– )

2/10

Abysmal casting and "did before" stories.

1 August 2022

Other than Pike and chief of security, the casting is just abysmal. They all look... deformed. And the actor playing spoc, can't act his way out of a paper bag.

The stories have all been done before... and this re-telling isn't even interesting. I *really* want to like it, but I keep falling asleep.

I really enjoyed TNG, loved Voyager, and really love the newer movies and series (except Picard... which was just old people being old). I could never get into the original series, and this Feels like the original series, made shiny.

Edit: Just watched episode 8 and 9... And my rating went down 2 stars and 1 star respectively.

Previously rated as 5 star. Episode 8 was just pure cringe, start to finish. It put how pathetic every aspect of the series on full display... writing, sets, acting... abysmal. That episode should just be burned.

Episode 9 was a straight up rip off of the movie "Aliens", Newt and all.

It's amazing how good Discovery is and how bad SNW is...

Strange New worlds starts off bad, and progressively gets worse.

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