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Saw X (2023)
4/10
I feel misled by the positive reviews
24 October 2023
Was this better than the last 3 movies (Saw 3D, Jigsaw, and Spiral)? Sure. But it was a 4/10 rather than the 3/10 those movies were. Hardly a return to form.

The setup was revealed in the summary you read when you choose whether to rent this movie, so they spoil the reveal before you even start watching. This is not a scary movie, but a revenge story. It might as well be a subpar John Wick with traps instead of guns. There are no jump scares and rarely any tension.

The main "bad guy" being tested ends up being a sociopath - not an even slightly interesting character and not a single hint of moral ambiguity. It's not unprecedented in the series to have an evil or irredeemable person die in a trap, but literally none of the tested in this movie turn out to be remotely likable. You don't root for their "redemption," you're just waiting for the blood spray and screams to end so the plot will move on. There was no journey the characters went on where you wondered will they/won't they change. The characters are just...flat.

The twist at the end is weak. I am literally the worst at figuring out reveals, and even I knew what it was (even if I didn't know all the details). It was not a shock and had no emotional weight. And we don't even find out how the final trap ends...or even exactly how it works!

I also spent a lot of the movie trying to figure out what the hell they did to the lovely Shawnee Smith's face. I can't tell if it was awful CGI de-aging, if she's had plastic surgery, or if she had some kind of allergy she was suffering from during filming, but it really did not look quite like her. I am not trying to be critical of her looks - it just looked differently enough from her previous films that it was distracting. It would have been less weird if she'd just looked her current age, despite this being a prequel.

Honestly, this movie was a major disappointment. Even Saw 6 was twice as engaging as this movie and had similar themes related to greed and taking advantage of the ill and dying without conscience. By the end of that movie, the main character was human, with complexity and an emotional journey that changed him. Not so with Saw X. It misses the mark and I cannot for the life of me understand why I keep hoping for a return to the compelling storytelling we used to get from this franchise. Shame I can't return it.
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Elevator (V) (2012)
2/10
One of the most boring movies I've ever seen
28 May 2023
I enjoyed Devil and other enclosed space movies that generally aren't rated too highly. So I was hoping the concept would work in this one, but it's far too boring. I've never seen a horror movie or a thriller with so few elements of tension. I don't want to spoil what happens at the end so you're more likely to read my review but you will not come out of this movie scared, caring about any of the characters, or feeling like anyone learned anything at all or had any sort of development. There are a couple of long extended scenes where you may even wonder if the recording stopped working but no, they just padded the run time with just a black screen.

I've now seen this movie twice because I forgot I'd already seen it until about halfway through when I went to IMDB to double check the rating to see if I'd misread the numbers. Apparently I'd already rated this a 2/10 so I'll keep that rating even though a second viewing has me thinking that was too generous. Save your two hours and watch literally anything else instead.
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The Menu (2022)
5/10
It just wasn't very fun
2 February 2023
I hate rating this movie so low because the acting was excellent, there is so much depth to the themes, it was creative as all hell, and it's visually very pleasing. I feel weird about feeling like it was technically, objectively a very good movie and yet still not much fun to watch. I can't quite put my finger on why either.

I went into the movie blind, only knowing that it was supposed to be a horror movie. While it was tense and violent in some parts, I genuinely didn't ever feel scared. They tell you relatively early in the film what the ending is going to be, so I didn't really feel the same dread as I think I would have if it hadn't been explicitly and repeatedly stated. Or if I had cared at all about 98% of the characters. (And yes, I get that I wasn't supposed to like them.)

It still was interesting to watch, but for a movie that has themes about passion and joy, I just didn't find it much fun. That's where it missed the mark for me. Well crafted? Yes. Smart? Yes. Fun? No. And that's what I want out of my movies, and my food for that matter. Simple enjoyment. And maybe that's the point.

I think it is worth a watch. I think for a lot of people this will be an 8/10 or higher. I just personally don't think it should be rated highly just because it had something intelligent to say.
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The Master (2012)
3/10
Unbelievably boring
4 September 2021
Phillip Seymour Hoffman was an incredible actor. He gives a phenomenal performance in this movie. Amy Adams is underused but gives a strong performance as well. I've never seen Joaquin Phoenix in any role where he wasn't playing some kind of damaged, broken, struggling person so I'm not sure if he's a great actor or a one-trick pony, but he plays the role completely as intended nonetheless.

That's the only reason I rated this above a 1. Never have I experienced a more well-acted film that made me feel literally no emotions but boredom. I had to resist the urge to watch in 2x speed. I kept checking the runtime. There was no plot, no drama, no climax, no conflict, nothing. Just some people on the screen living out a few years of their lives and then it ended.

I get that it's supposed to be inspired by Scientology, something I've read tons of books and watched half a dozen documentaries about. The subject matter is fascinating and they did nothing interesting at all with it. I have no idea how this was rated so highly. Seriously, save your time.
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Elysium (I) (2013)
8/10
This is the Blomkamp movie you ought to watch
2 September 2021
I thought District 9 was one of the worst movies ever made. I rated it 1 out of 10. I almost didn't see this movie because it has the same director (I literally waited until 2021 to see it for the first time). Matt Damon really just never misses. His acting is spot on and Alice Braga manages a performance that brings me to tears. If you're going to see a Blomkamp film, see this one. It's a science fiction Robin Hood tale that is gorgeous, deeply moving, and disturbingly plausible.
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After Earth (2013)
6/10
Worth watching, not aMaZiNg but not nearly as bad as they say
1 September 2021
Warning: Spoilers
It's not groundbreaking. It's very obvious how the story will end (no stupid twists that this director is known for-shame he got panned for finally making a straightforward and decent movie!!). The plot has a neat premise, even though it's not something that will stick with you forever. The acting/affect choices are a bit odd but you get used to the wooden demeanor after awhile and it makes sense given the story. The plot is generally interesting, the pacing is well done (after the introductory exposition, at least), and the good guys win in the end. It's a nice Saturday afternoon kind of sci-fi movie and it's very pretty to look at. What's not to like?

If you want a timeless classic with Will and Jaden Smith that will stick with you forever, go watch The Pursuit of Happyness. If you just want to enjoy a couple of hours of a sci-fi survival mission with the same duo and not cry so much, watch After Earth instead. It's good.
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4/10
If I hadn't already done research I would have been completely lost
20 August 2021
Warning: Spoilers
I've read half a dozen books and seen a couple of other docs about Scientology. It's only because of this that I really have a handle on who these players are and why they are so important. If it weren't for that, this documentary would have been far from impactful.

Honestly, the storytelling is confusing and the actors reading lines for a movie that isn't being filmed is super weird. The story just isn't well told. Don't let this be your first introduction to Scientology. It is far more interesting and the Sea Org far more insidious than this documentary really shows, in my personal opinion. (I admit, I have no inside information about the abuses, this is just my opinion based on books I've read from people who say they were there, please do not sue me. Thanks.)

That being said, it was cool to see an e-meter and to see some of the training that people in the church go through. But if you're looking for a comprehensive explanation of what this organization is and why it's so insidious, look elsewhere. This is just a bizarre casting call, a few Scientologists screaming about trespassing and suppressive persons, and a bunch of disclaimers/denials in text from the church's perspective.

All in all, I was disappointed and learned almost nothing new.
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Mortal Kombat (2021)
3/10
Pretty bad, if you don't already love Mortal Kombat
9 May 2021
I do not know hardly anything at all about Mortal Kombat other than it's an old fighting video game that was extremely popular and has "fatalities" in it that are rather graphic. I do not have any particular memories of MK, I have never played it, and I have never seen any of the previous movies. So there is absolutely no nostalgia factor for me.

This movie was pretty nonsensical. I had no idea how or why a lot of the things were happening. It was like I needed to rely on some prequel or something that I've never seen before if I was going to understand it. The plot was a bit dry and some of the lines were awkward and stilted, I'm assuming so that they could shoehorn in lines from the game. They would introduce a new character with super dramatic music and I did not understand why I should care.

Overall, if you do not know anything about MK already, definitely just skip this movie. I like action movies and I usually don't have a problem suspending disbelief, but this movie just missed the mark for me.
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Ride (III) (2018)
2/10
Poor writing, nonsensical story
24 July 2020
Warning: Spoilers
This movie started out with promise. The script should have been developed into a rom com instead of...whatever this was supposed to be. It wasn't scary or thrilling like the movie Collateral (seriously, just watch that instead). It just takes a bizarre turn in the middle of this barely feature length film and never makes any sense whatsoever. If you watch it, stop at the part where they're dancing in the middle of the street. Everything after is a waste of your time.

What a waste of talented actors.
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Battleground (2012)
Such a fun show!
4 November 2012
I can't seem to find a way to rate this series, so I guess I have to write a review instead. If you ever enjoyed The Office or similar shows, you'll really enjoy this one. I was really surprised by how well done this show really is. The acting has to be top notch to carry a viewer's interest in a program like this because virtually all of the "action" is dialogue between the characters. I immediately fell in love with Ben and Ali's characters. (And yes, I do mean Ali and not Lindsay. Her interactions with Jordan are priceless.) Even Tak was compelling to watch, as his character is complicated, even if only likable at certain times. It honestly doesn't feel like you're watching something cheaper or of less quality than a show that is made for television. If it had aired on NBC instead of Hulu, it would have gotten a LOT more buzz. If you have a few hours, you can watch the entire first season in an afternoon and it's definitely worth it. Do not miss this one!

I really hope it comes back for another season because there are still some questions I'd really like resolved.
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3/10
Lower Your Expectations
4 September 2012
I don't write reviews often, but I feel particularly strongly about this movie.

I watched all three of the movies in this semi-trilogy back to back today. The first one was okay, as was the second (which I actually preferred to the first). But I'll Always Know is quite obviously the worst of the three, and I'm basing this purely on the merits of this film. I don't really care that the cast isn't the same, and I wasn't even particularly concerned about the obvious plot difficulties surrounding the catalyst death.

This is a direct-to-video movie, but even keeping that in mind, I can't give this movie better than a 3. The first half to 3/4 of the movie isn't terrible--it's about the level of quality you'd expect (low, but watchable). However, the last part of the movie just disintegrates and really makes it obvious that you made a mistake in ever wasting your time with it. I won't give anything away, but a lot of the movie is spent trying to figure out who this film's Fisherman is. Based on what you know about the three films, try to imagine the absolute WORST idea for the identity of the Fisherman. If you decide to watch this movie, that's the ending you're going to get. I guarantee it. If your idea even halfway seems like it would be decent, you haven't come up with the worst idea yet.

I strongly recommend turning off the film right before the big reveal.

You've been warned.
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Predators (2010)
6/10
I have not seen the first two Predator movies...
8 February 2011
Warning: Spoilers
My only experience with Predator has been through AvP and the only reason I saw that movie was because I was a big fan of the Alien franchise. Predators was intended to be a sequel only to the original Predator movies and I think they succeeded in distancing themselves from AvP.

I was concerned that I would not enjoy this movie since I haven't seen the rest of the franchise. However, I still found this to be a decent action flick. There is just enough fighting and backstabbing among the characters to move the plot forward and although the movie's reveals and ending are not hard to predict, they are still neat to watch unfold.

I only rated this movie a 6 for a few reasons. One, there is a scene of pretty unnecessary "gore" with a bunch of skinned bodies that are zoomed in on repeatedly. I didn't get the point of that and I really hate gross-out scenes that don't have a point behind them. Two, I didn't like that Lawrence Fishburne's character wasn't given more time to develop. He's the main reason I picked up this one.

Basically, this movie is enjoyable if you are not intimately familiar with the Predator franchise, but don't expect to be blown away.
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5/10
Incredibly creepy little tale
29 January 2011
This story is best described as a dramatic thriller. It's not a horror film per se (not even remotely in the same vein as a modern slasher flick). I felt a little tense, but definitely not scared while watching it. With that being said, I think it's appropriate to keep the "horror" tag associated with this film for the simple fact that I personally found the story developments with Martin Sheen's character to be more than a little horrifying. I was incredibly uncomfortable whenever Frank (Sheen's character) was on screen.

I think the acting in this movie was quite good. Jodie Foster is excellent in this movie and I'm not surprised that she won an award for her role. Her character is resourceful and resilient, while reminding you at times that she still is a vulnerable little girl. Martin Sheen's creepy character was not very subtle, even from his very first appearance in the film, but Sheen still manages to make him very credible. Scott Jacoby also did a decent performance in his supporting role as Mario.

As for the plot, it moves rather slowly but deliberately. The setting rarely changes (and I mean *rarely*), but I didn't find myself noticing that so much because I found the plot rather gripping. For those in my generation and younger - if you are not old enough to have seen this film during its original release, I'm talking to you - *please* remember that this is a dramatic thriller from 1976. As such this is a plot driven movie, not an action driven movie. Things do happen during the course of the film, but don't expect excessive blood and guts, nuclear explosions, random car chases, alien robots, or other special effects creations that are commonly used in modern films. While I do like movies that contain those things and I'm not knocking them, I can tell you with certainty that they are not present in this film. If you have found that you require state-of-the-art special effects or fast-paced action in order to really enjoy a movie, you will do yourself a favor by skipping this film. You're almost guaranteed to find this movie to be slow, boring, and action-less.

Now, as much as I applaud this movie for its strengths, I did only rate it a 5 out of 10 for a few reasons. First, some of the characters' actions, Mario's in particular, just didn't seem like normal human reactions to the situations that were unfolding. Secondly, I didn't feel like there were any dynamic characters. The plot certainly pulled back a couple of layers of truth so that the audience understands more at the middle and end of the film than we do at the beginning. However, I didn't feel like there were any character changes (for better or for worse), important realizations, or growth/development for any of the characters in the film.

I didn't know what to think at the film's abrupt end, other than repulsion. I couldn't find anything exactly to take away from the film, whether a moral message or a thought-provoking concept or a sense of ambiguity and wonder. While something in my psyche enjoys being scared by films, I don't particularly care for films when the only major reaction they elicit from me is disgust. I tend to prefer psychological thrillers (basically those are the ones that make the audience say at the end "wow that was a mindf*** - for lack of a more sophisticated expression). Perhaps I've been poisoned by the "Saw twist" that modern horror movies try to duplicate, but I just felt like there was something lacking in this film. I felt empty at the end. I'm not sure if that was the point, but if it was, then it explains why I will not be watching this movie again.
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Devil (2010)
7/10
Finally, another decent film from Shyamalan
1 January 2011
I genuinely enjoyed this movie and think it was a nice escape and one of the better films that Shyamalan has made in the past decade. I'm not a fan of M. Night Shyamalan, per se. I have been disappointed too many times (i.e. "Signs," "The Happening") to have very high expectations for his films. I like as many of his movies as I dislike, and some ("The Village," "Lady in the Water") I just can't bring myself to sit through. Whatever your feelings are about him as a writer (as he does not direct "Devil"), if your expectations for this film aren't too high I expect you may enjoy it as well.

"Devil" is certainly not the next "Sixth Sense" or "Unbreakable," but it's a thoroughly entertaining exercise in suspense. The voice-over in the first few minutes of the movie gives you the basic plot: someone is going to commit suicide and then a group of trapped people will be tormented by the Devil and killed off one by one. I don't believe in the supernatural, but this film was still sufficiently creepy for me as someone who has been trapped in several elevators in her life - the tension and terror can be very real even when there is no real threat. For someone that has never been trapped, you may find it more difficult to relate to the characters and fully understand the height of the tension leading up to the beginning of the action.

As for expectations, try to enjoy the film for what it is and don't look into it too deeply. This is NOT a horror film. I definitely think it is more of a psychological thriller, although not in the sense that it will blow your mind at the end. There is some blood, but in order to build the suspense and hide the identity of the antagonist, the majority of the violence is not actually seen. If you're a fan of the modern horror genre and you do not find the supernatural to be inherently frightening, this movie isn't going to scare you. This is a spiritual tale more than anything else. This is not an original story either, although I'm not of the belief that an idea must be original for it to be told in an interesting way. There is also no huge mind-bending twist here, so don't expect this to be like "Sixth Sense" or "Saw" in an elevator. You know right from the beginning of the film that someone is not who they seem to be. I'm not usually able to pick out the right person, but I was able to with this film. If that kind of predictability bothers you, then this isn't your film.

However, to me, the fun of this film is not really in the final reveal or the resolution of the related subplot. It's really in the experience you have watching those who are trapped in this bizarre situation and how they react to the experience. I think this will appeal to anyone who isn't looking for anything more than a fun way to zone out for a little over an hour. This is far, far better than Shyamalan's worst work. Here's hoping he is working back up to better films and that this is not a minor blip in his trajectory.
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Dark Country (2009)
3/10
I probably should have spent my $1 on some gum instead
7 November 2009
I rented this movie from Redbox in the hopes of enjoying some good scares. However, Dark Country really didn't impress me and certainly didn't get under my skin. If anything, I was just bored and sleepy throughout it. The film was dark and had interesting cinematography (reason for the three stars), but the ending was such a letdown. I felt like I had suffered through all the slow parts of the movie just to be confused at the end. I thought the acting was okay for an average horror film, but the lack of plot development kept me from caring what happened to the main characters. While I was not confused into thinking this was supposed to be a documentary (meaning I didn't expect it to be completely realistic) I didn't find the twist ending believable at all. There are ways to make a film so engrossing that you are able to suspend disbelief and get sucked into the world of the film. Dark Country failed miserably at this. It was pretty easy to guess where they were going too. I can almost never guess twist endings, but this one was obvious even to me. There were some loose ends that didn't seem tied up and I would have liked the ending to be a lot neater. It's almost as if they ran out of ideas and just threw in this particular ending at the last minute so they could complete the film.

I honestly would recommend avoiding this movie. It really wasn't worth the time I spent watching it nor the $1 rental fee.
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8/10
Best of the 3 Moviees
6 May 2007
Warning: Spoilers
Mission Impossible 3 has to be my favorite out of the series so far. It had all the action, suspense, and semi-predictable plot twist of the first movie. It also had the romance and happy ending of the second movie, but without it being over-the-top and uninteresting. I usually find the whole Tom Cruise goes to "save the world" and "save the girl" story lines boring and cliché, but Michelle Monaghan's acting saves the movie from turning me off. Julia shows that she is not the stereotypical weak female in some of her final scenes where she kills two "bad guys" and saves Ethan's life.

The only reason I didn't rate this movie higher is because of Philip Seymour Hoffman. I find him extremely annoying and dry; his acting lacks the character needed to portray a villain. However, the damage he does to the movie is not substantial. This movie is definitely worth seeing and worth buying.
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The Hitcher (2007)
8/10
Excellent film
5 May 2007
Warning: Spoilers
I haven't seen the original so keep that in mind with this review. I thought the movie was a good action film, with enough violence, gore, and suspense to make it a good thriller. The problem with this movie is that you don't end up caring about the characters in the end. The hitcher himself also has no character development which could have mad his character more frightening. The ending was also a little disappointing. It could have been better if the hitcher lived at the end and could have set the plot up for continuation in a sequel. Overall, highly entertaining, but certainly not an award winner for plot or acting.
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Stay Alive (2006)
3/10
Excellent horror movie for the easily frightened
2 May 2007
Warning: Spoilers
This movie was not very good in my opinion. While not a complete waste of an hour and a half (luckily I didn't have to pay $ for it), it just wasn't very scary. There were parts where I jumped and a few minimally violent/gory scenes, but overall only someone easily frightened would consider this movie scary.

The overall writing and acting were very weak. The characters never evolved or grew as people. Even at the end, the lead guy, whatever his name was, didn't man up and had to be rescued from the fire at the last minute. The plot also had inconsistencies. The police officer who was killed was NOT murdered in the same way he died in the game. The girl October mentioned that in order to kill the evil demon lady you had to read something from the correct text. Funny how they never bothered to do that and still managed to escape. The Malcolm-in-the-Middle kid died in the game but didn't die "in real life." Also, making the game play by itself was very weak writing. It would have been okay for the brother's death, just to get them playing again. But you are supposed to play a video game and stay alive and 3 people die before you play again...why do you even need the game? If you like movies like the Ring and thing its scary and fun, watch this movie. If you know someone like that you can watch it with at laugh at, do it. If you like "horror" movies that make you laugh out loud and you have the opportunity to watch this movie for free, do it. Otherwise, stay far far away.
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10/10
Excellent film
2 January 2007
Warning: Spoilers
Little Miss Sunshine was refreshing and different. This film definitely is not for everyone. If you prefer laugh-out-loud Will Farrell type humor this movie probably is not for you. However the movie was surprisingly original among the slew of Hollywood remakes that came out last year. I am an avid Law and Order SVU fan, and I was pleasantly surprised to see how well Abigail Breslin adapted to the much less serious role of Olive in this film. She was charming and heartwarming, and even though her talents were a little less than conventional and pretty inappropriate, I found myself rooting for her at the end of the film. Also excellent in the film was Alan Arkin as the grandfather. Though his language and personality is abrasive, I found myself connecting to him as well, because of his self-fulfilling outlook on life. I felt myself relating to some characters in the family and I was repulsed by others. At the end of the film I felt uplifted because of the love that inevitably bound the family together. This is a must see film for anyone looking for originality and good fun.
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