Reviews

It's like an old movie on late night TV that isn't worth changing channels for.

A Parisian model is called back to Madrid after her grandmother has a stroke. But as she starts taking care of her elderly abuela, mysterious things begin happening.

This feels like a remake of The Omen, but at the opposite end of life. It has the same slow beginning, the same weird events, and the same predictable climax.

I expected more from the director of Rec.

The scariest thing about this movie is thinking about how people are going to have to change your diapers one day.

Like watching a family fight in public, you just want to turn away and pretend not to notice. This is harder when they're on a giant screen in front of you.

This is the story of a schizophrenic woman and her older sister who comes to visit the family home for their mother's birthday. Basically, they take turns screaming at each other for 82 minutes.

If you're looking for a better film on this same theme, try System Crasher or Les Intranquilles / The Restless instead.

Like when you make excuses for your bigot parents because "they don't really mean it".

An innocent, rich, European teenager wants to befriend her Colombian maid's poor, immoral daughter and if wishes were clichés, they'd all come true in this movie.

Like eating at the kids table, the conversation is sincere, but predictable and all over the place.

This Uruguayan film has about 5 false starts before it drops all of them to tell an earnest tale that won't surprise you in the least.

Mademoiselle Paradis is the true story of blind Austrian prodigy pianist Maria Theresia Paradis (1759-1824) and her treatment under controversial doctor Franz Anton Mesmer (who believed there is an invisible aether coursing through us, that the treatment of this liquid could cure diseases, and from whom we get the terms 'mesmerize' and 'animal magnetism'). He was, it would seem, able to cure her blindness long as she was in his care.

I don't know if the film is interesting from a historical point of view or if it's only the director that makes it so. What I do know is interesting is the directing, which makes good use of lighting and contrast to illuminate the story of this blind young woman and dispel the shadows around medicine and misogyny in late 18th century Europe.

The actors and their costumes blend in perfectly with the setting, so fans of period dramas will find a lot to admire here. In short, this film is like Mesmer's liquid: no one will ever see it, but that doesn't mean it's without power.

Like an AA meeting: disjointed, funny, moving, boring, inspiring and, ultimately, rewarding.

The actors are mesmerising. Joaquin Phoenix recovers nicely here from his misstep with Mary Magdalene but it's Jonah Hill as the sage gay sponsor who steals the film with a subtle portrayal imbued with nonchalant spirituality. Rock stars Kim Gordon (Sonic Youth) and Beth Ditto (Gossip) make appearances and Ditto turns in a solid gold performance that left me hoping she'll continue down the acting path.

Despite being overlong and bogged down with unnecessarily complicated timeline, the overall film moved me and made me glad I got past the clunky title and misleading rom-com poster.

Red Sparrow is like commuting to work: it takes a long time to get where you already know you're going--and it feels even longer. What I wouldn't have given for an unforeseen turn.

To be totally honest, what I like most about Mrs. Hyde is that she's independent, inscrutable, and a little rough around the edges.

Mrs. Hyde (Madame Hyde in the original French) is a scientific indie parable about a beleaguered high school physics teacher (Mrs. Géquil, which, strangely enough, sounds a lot like the French pronunciation of 'Jekyll') of children in difficulty. On the night of a red moon, she's working in her lab and a lightning strike passes through her equipment (she's doing experiments on body heat and electricity) and into her. This electroshock transforms her into a better teacher during the day and a strange, burning red moon creature in the evening.

If this film had been a polished, studio release, it would have been a shocking waste. But as it's an indie filmed backed by a surprisingly a-list cast (Isabelle Huppert, Romain Duris, José Garcia...), the look and feel of the film is reminiscent of Michel Gondry's La Science des Rêves.

This is a film that won't be liked by many, but those who appreciate quirky, weird, tongue-in-cheek independent modern fables with offbeat humour will find something to enjoy here. Mrs. Hyde is an uncomfortable experience, but not an unpleasant one.

What you would expect from a Disney documentary --beautiful footage, incredible seascapes and captivating tales -- but nothing more. A fantastic one-off, but I have visions of this collecting dust on hard drives for years to come.