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Anywhere, USA (2008)
3/10
Nigh-unbearable
28 January 2008
Warning: Spoilers
Sadly, this movie turned out to be pretty much unbearable, and I was forced to concede defeat when my mom and sister demanded to leave the theater, because it was just bad. The film tells a "three part" narrative of 3 seemingly unrelated groups of people, which I will relate as follows:

In Part One, a pea-brained, long haired redneck enlists the aid of his racist, obscenity-spouting friend (who happens to also be a tattooed midget with pierced nipples) to spy on his girlfriend, who has been "looking at cocks on the internet". They take the spying too far and accidentally shoot Ali, the girlfriend's online suitor, who they believe to be a terrorist. One major problem here is how looooong everything takes - while slow, "meaning-laced" words poignantly drift across the screen, to just.. allow us to ponder the gravity of this moment.

After over an hour of this, we finally get the news that Part Two is beginning. Yay.. an 8 year old orphan first accidentally eating pot brownies, becoming disillusioned and depressed over finding out the tooth fairy isn't real, and then discovering her uncle's tequila in the glove compartment and dives right in. I would comment on the rest of this and Part Three, but this is right about where we finally gave up and left.

This was probably one of the longest films at Sundance this year, and it was really not worth 2 hours of your life. It's just sad, depressing, squalid, and above all, drawn out to the point of boredom. Unfortunately cannot recommend this title.
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Bottle Shock (2008)
8/10
Great story with a bit of Hollywood editorializing
24 January 2008
Yes, it may be a bit Hollywood-ized, but overall it's a fun film with a great cast. Alan Rickman is delightful as Stephen Spurrier (not portraying him as effete, as the real S. Spurrier complained of upon reading the screenplay), and Bill Pullman, Freddy Rodriguez, and Chris Pine all turn in great performances as well. Dennis Farina is an amusing and welcome addition if also because of his scenes with Rickman. One negative aspect is that the gorgeous and talented Rachael Taylor is not put to better use. Also, one very negative aspect is that the love plot is totally weird and seems an afterthought - the movie would have been a lot better without it.

That said, I really don't have other complaints, and I found the story interesting and basically just enjoyed the film. Sure, it may have some corny scenes, but geez.. when was the last time you watched a movie without a corny scene?? Just because you've seen the story before in, say, The Mighty Ducks, doesn't make it necessarily bad.

Also, for those who have issues with the facts of the story that have been changed, you can rent any number of documentaries on the story for free from your library - this film, might I remind you, declares itself "based" on a true story, which it is. I also highly recommend checking out George Taber's book, Judgment of Paris, which inspired this film.
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