Change Your Image
vze2363v
Reviews
Split (2016)
WARNING: SPOILERS For Split
I'm going to leave a couple of blank lines just in case you didn't see the SPOILER warning...but apparently it doesn't work. First, I'm going to say I don't particularly like horror movies, so if you're a big horror fan, you MAY love this movie. I hate any movie where women act stupid, helpless, slow...you get the idea. Poverty makes a woman intolerant and if you are a strong woman, this movie is going to seem like someone is slowly scratching their nails across a chalkboard. By the end of the movie I was hoping the beast would kill the victim!
The story line is simple. Stupid girl doesn't pay any attention to her surroundings, stupid girl let's guy drug her and her two friends with aerosol, guy shoves 3 stupid girls in a locked room and keeps them there while he goes through his alternate personalities. There are plenty of chances for girls to escape, run away, but then they get all "oooo, I'm a girl, I can't use my brain, I have to be helpless" and they get locked in different rooms.
In the end, multi-personality guy changes into a mutant and kills his shrink and two of the girls. When he gets to the last girl we painfully watch as she just acts idiotic, drops shotgun shells all over, has a chance to kill the beast by shooting him multiple times at his C1 vertebrae, but does she do it? NOOOOO, she just lets him get away. Now there's a mutant killer running around free.
At that point I was hoping a large piece of the ceiling would kill her and put US out of our misery. Instead she continues to act stupid, mousy, like she owes the guy because he didn't kill her. In the end, there's a special cameo that tie's into another M. Night Shyamalan movie. I will never go to another horror movie again.
I know people will say, but it was all about a mental health issue and it was supposed to be complex, etc. My friend wanted to share the joy of the X-Men movies with me as I'd never seen them, so I'd watched all of them in chronological order (including Logan). I also watch Legion on TV, so I'm over the whole multi-personality thing.
Again, if you like horror, maybe you'll like this. If you HATE watching women acting stupid and helpless, stay away from this film. You'll be doing yourself a favor. Buyer beware!
Why Him? (2016)
If You Can Get Through The First 75%, You May Enjoy The Last 25%
Be warned - if you weren't brought up with your own cell phone and a Twitter account, this movie will probably make you sick. I literally had to FORCE myself to watch it all the way through. It should be a wake-up call to how selfish, egotistical and banal society has become. In many cases, people don't bother to actually raise their children any more. They just sit them in front of tech and expect them to come into adulthood perfectly balanced.
The main character is SOOO coarse and it takes WAY too long to get to the message (if they intended one). It's almost like Jonas Hill & Company were trying to emulate Kevin Smith's formula of quirky basic human goodness and failed miserably.
Honestly, I can't recommend anyone watch this movie. The only people who will enjoy it are the tech babies who can understand the cursing/stupidity/sexual idiocy. The ending makes it's point, but far too late for anyone to care (except the tech babies who most likely won't even "get" it). Save your money.
Single by 30 (2016)
To The Heart, To The Point
Wong Fu Productions, long known for it's ability to touch the heart of it's viewing public, delivers in spades with "Single By 30."
Harry Shum Jr. embodies the male lead who after an unexpected failed relationship finds himself forced to re-assess where he's allowed his life to go. Kina Grannis' character shows us no matter how well- planned you think your life is, the relationships you were exposed to as a child speak depths about your ability to find true happiness.
Wong Fu's gift is being able to show the public how complex life and relationships can be. Those who may have never been exposed to a healthy relationship or had parents who pushed responsibility over finding happiness in life can glean a thread from this series as they watch our lovers try to figure it out for themselves.
To not see the beauty of Wong Fu's message is to lack empathy for people struggling to grow. Tears will flow and hopefully "Single By 30" will help you support others on their path to finding true love.
Cop Out (2010)
Not Perfect, But Worth A DVD Rental
I saw a lot of bad reviews for "Cop Out" before I had an opportunity to actually see the movie. The thing about bad reviews is they are all subjective. For example, I would avoid anything with Seann William Scott in it like the plague. I love Kevin Smith movies, but two-year old mimicking behavior turns me off.
I was pleasantly surprised with this movie. Scott wasn't half as annoying as the trailer would lead you to believe. The two-year old behavior was confined mostly to one short scene.
Kevin Smith clearly didn't write the script. It never engages you the way a Kevin Smith script would. It takes a few minutes before Morgan's character gels. For me, Tracy can be too over-the-top, but I found his overall performance to actually be funny once he settled down. Bruce Willis is Bruce Willis - no nonsense, all male stability to Tracy's all- over-the-place needy partner. The partnership works better in some places than others. I thought the bit with the little kid was funny as all out. I don't live in New York City though, so there is no seriousness about little kids stealing cars.
This isn't the best movie you're ever going to watch. It didn't have any of the finesse of the last Die Hard Movie (4) and the script was pretty weak sauce. It needs a little time to start gelling, but once it gets going it makes sense.
There are several funny places in this movie. I like that Morgan's storyline suited his maturity level (paranoia about his wife cheating on him while he was working), while Bruce's was equally mature for his character (how to pay for daughter's wedding).
I liked this movie because I like action movies. Men trying to blow a hole through their surroundings when they clearly have had no training in making a direct hit amuses me. I love Bruce Willis and Kevin Smith and the rebel in me wouldn't allow other people's low opinions of the movie make me miss it altogether. I will say if you are a movie snob, this probably isn't the movie for you.
"Cop Out" is a fun little interlude on the same level as those movies Comedy Central shows every weekend. It's a decent way to get a laugh, but "Down Periscope" it's not. If you have the attention span of a gnat, you might not be able to hang in for the good parts. They are there and I laughed more than I expected to. I will probably buy the movie at some point, because Bruce is in it and it wasn't horrible. I expect it to show up in the $5 bin at Wal-Mart shortly, which is where a lot of my DVD collection comes from. I believe in cheap films you can watch all day when you're at home sick (and can't afford cable). This movie definitely qualifies.
The X Files: I Want to Believe (2008)
As A Shipper, I Loved It!
Many people comment about whether it was appropriate for the movie to be this or that. Having watched all 9 seasons of The X-Files as they aired, I can say this was exactly that, but more grown up. Anytime characters can grow instead of being boxed in by the "oh my gosh we can't let them be together because than the show will be over" precedent, I'm happy as a clam.
Yes, it had all the traditional X-Files story telling in it, albeit a little gross at times (what the A storyline villains were doing was WAY out there - exactly what I'd expect from an X-Files story). More important to me was Mulder and Scully facing who they are to one another and trying to work it out. I liked the storyline. I didn't find it boring or predictable. I absolutely LOVED seeing David Duchovny and Gillian Anderson back together - their chemistry is life-long apparently. Duchovny brings his own knowledge of marriage and caring about another into this role as mate, which is as it should be.
I WANT my characters to grow up and show us that true love isn't dead. It didn't take over the product at all - as a matter of fact I would have like to have seen more physical passion between the two, but I know how much non-shippers would have complained. I was satisfied knowing that they did address the idea that people can be in love, no matter what form their relationship takes.
I was happy to see Skinner back again. This movie was exactly what I watched the X-Files for. You'll get no complaints from me.
August (2008)
Well, if you like Josh...
This movie was what it was - a story about a less than honorable person being less than honorable. They show him being vile to people, including an old girlfriend who is doomed to find out he hasn't changed at all. In the end, he makes a decision about his life and his family.
I didn't find anything at all hopeful about this movie. It was pure angst from the minute it began; the music weighing it down more than the script already did. This movie could only be interesting to someone in this type of business in New York. I fell asleep twice. I was hoping to see information about how 9-11 affected companies on the brink, but it never went there. The closest they got was the passing of Aaliyah.
If you enjoy looking at Josh Hartnett's body, you'll be able to get through this film. If not, you may wish you had these two hours back. He was very good at playing the type of character he was asked to play, but the character itself was hideous. Just my opinion.
Hancock (2008)
LOVED IT! Super-heroes and Depth - Something for Everyone
If you are someone who prefers their entertainment say something beyond see Spot, see Spot run, you'll most likely enjoy this movie. For the men, it has great action. There's plenty of destruction of things and lots of bullets flying. Instead of being Batman, cookie-cutter good and evil though, this film takes a look at who we are as a society and how we (super-hero or not) can get the way men sometimes do - less than perfect.
Will Smith portrays a dis-illusioned super-hero who is all alone. Like many in society have chosen to, he tries to sweep away the loneliness with alcohol until one day his path crosses a down and out PR guy who tries to help him. Having someone who actually cares about him, Hancock tries to make amends to his drunken past and in the process a twist you don't see coming is revealed.
The story is sprinkled lightly with some history and in the end we learn that coping can sometimes merely be a matter of understanding the world you live in and and why each of us are here.
I loved the whole super-hero thing. Let's face it - as a man, Will Smith is hot! What makes him even hotter in this movie is the fact that the dream of super-hero powers is blended with the responsibilities we all have to face, co-existing as we were meant to and how that sometimes goes very wrong.
If you like your entertainment to be bolstered by giving you something to think about, this movie's the one for you. It's a perfect date movie - enough destruction and he-man antics for the men with a deeper message for the women.
You Don't Mess with the Zohan (2008)
I laughed so hard, I almost...
I'm not really a big Adam Sandler fan. Some of his movies in the past have been too sophomoric for me, but this movie was funny as all out!!! You're either going to love it or hate it and it will depend completely on what type of comedy you like.
There were a million physical gags. Interwoven between all the funny was the reality that the middle east has been a powder keg forever and it is likely it will be that way till the end of time. Sandler seems to be trying to point out that the regular, every day people from the middle east are much like we are, sick of wars and fighting. We just want to raise our children and grow old with our better half.
Mariah Carey being in the movie is just another gag, but it comes off OK because she's spoofing the things she has to put up with as a famous person.
I was pleasantly surprised with this movie. It's one you should have in your DVD collection for those days you need a good laugh!
War, Inc. (2008)
Laughed My Rear End Off!!!
I LOVE John Cusack, so naturally I would want to see this movie. I got three times better than what I expected. It was funny, it was smart, it was informative, it was satire for intelligent people. Some of the gags are hysterical when put into context with the current war in Iraq. It was a fun ride!
The best part of the movie was how great the actors were. Of course John was fantastic in his role as assassin (any time John Cusack picks up a gun to shoot someone, I'll be there!). Seeing Joan Cusack doing her best wise-cracking was a plus. Marisa Tomei was fantastic.
The sets were so perfect and the props with their blatant product placement made it that much funnier. The whole tone of the "paid military" characters was hysterical.
This is definitely going to be a purchase for my home DVD collection.
Cavemen (2007)
Thank God for The Re-write!
A friend shared his copy of the pre-air version of the pilot for this show during the summer when several of us were bored stiff due to lack of good TV. It was an interesting way to waste 20 minutes. The original pilot was the WORST thing I had ever seen.
It may be because I saw the previous one that was so awful, but I actually saw improvement in the one we were served when the pilot finally aired on TV. I remember commenting that the acting was WAY above the script on the original pilot. I felt bad for the actors because it seemed beneath them (and I had no idea who they were). When I watched it on the air, it was clear that someone with an actual brain had been consulted on the script.
The show has an interesting take in almost a "Daily Show-esquire" manner regarding the judgments we make about those who are unlike ourselves. If you aren't able to see it in that light, you're bound to believe it is the biggest mistake a network ever let a programming director make.
Why, in the name of all that is good and holy, ABC chose to put something like "Cavemen" on the air instead of keeping something as well written and witty as "Sports Night" is beyond me. Perhaps they thought "Cavemen" would be more family friendly, but it turned out to be full of jokes only an adult would understand.
I will say the fake hair didn't bother me as much in this version as it did the pre-air version. Whether Make-up was trying harder to make it look natural or the better script kept me from picking at everything that was wrong with it, I don't know.
All I can tell you is "Cavemen" is more likely to be successful if it finds a cult following for it's sarcastic, self-deprecating humor. If you're looking for good TV, this is not the show to watch. If you're looking for something quirky to pass the time, then give it a view. The acting is OK, it's the script and the premise that still have a ways to go.
Live Free or Die Hard (2007)
Live Free or Die Hard - Can't Get Any Better
Each time they do a "Die Hard" movie, they get better and better. This one was no exception. The action starts at the beginning and takes your breath away. Every frame is so filled with movement you feel like you're actually there and expect pieces of whatever just blew up to come falling down around you.
I think the most important aspect of this film (while already being ALL the things I absolutely LOVE about the Die Hard series) is the connection to the kids. John McClane's daughter and Matt Farrell, super hacker, are represented in an incredibly "real" way - not condescending but as teens who have the same issues as the guy next door's family...well until they get involved in John McClane's world. At the end, you almost feel like you've stepped into John McClane's "non-action" life when the two keep repeating "did he/she say anything about me?" These characters lend themselves to a future "Die Hard" endeavor - McClane's daughter being the type who would take names and truly kick some rear-end.
The action was amazing. The story kept my attention from start to finish. I left the theater with a sense of camaraderie with all the other "Die Hard" fans who came to the "minute after midnight" premier in the United States. We ooooo'd and ahhhhh'd so much we missed half of John McClane's best lines, ensuring we would all have to come see the movie again once the initial booming impact of it faded away and we could concentrate on the story.
The icing on the cake for this most incredible of evenings was the fact that my favorite filmmaker, Kevin Smith, had a role in this movie. I know I'm being greedy, but I want "Die Hard 5" already. I never expected "Lie Free or Die Hard," but now that I've had it I want more. Hopefully someone will come up with a good script that will lend itself to being adapted to John McClane. If you loved the fast-paced, action-filled, take no prisoners style of the first three "Die Hard" movies this one is an ABSOLUTE MUST!!!
Friday Night Lights (2006)
***SPOILERS*** (Just In Case) - Friday Night Lights
I want to preface my review of the pilot episode by saying I like Kyle Chandler's work and that is why I watched the show, I never saw the movie.
As an east-coaster (non-Texan) it was hard for me to get through the episode. The contributing factors were the artsy way the show was shot, the horrible background music that was most times too loud, the incoherent presentation of the high school kid's personalities (from a writing standpoint) and the introduction of the coach as such a demure character. It really seemed like a train off the tracks. (And there was a really freakish glance from the girl who plays Kyle Chandler's daughter towards Kyle Chandler that gave me the willies.) If you can look past ALL that and hang in until the last 12 minutes, you will be rewarded. The score that droned on in the background made me want to knock someone upside the head with a frying pan as the last scene ended, but all the power and soul of the episode was contained in those last 12 minutes...it was well worth waiting for. If they continue in that vein, it could be a fantastic show. If they go "artsy" for the rest of the series, it will sink faster than you can say "Bob's yer uncle." Most outstanding actor in the whole episode was Gaius Charles; the only light in a bunch of muddled character definitions. He and Kyle Chandler have that same great screen presence. Everyone else seemed to get drowned out by the loud score and cluttered scenes. Kyle needs to work on his Texas drawl.