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weaselco
Reviews
Funeral for an Assassin (1974)
Complete crap!
It starts out on a street. A man sees a woman hand off a handbag to another. He goes after them. One gets hit by a bus, but you actually don't see it. This is the start to a truly poor film. I still don't know the significance to this first scene because of the horrible editing. Now the protagonist of this film is English and looks like Mic Jagger. He has zero charm and no acting skills. I think 85 percent of this film is talking heads. They even have the dinner scene when hes called back to work. WOW SO ORIGINAL! You see exactly how the film will end 60 minutes in to the movie and the suspense is non-existent since the bad guy is almost a good guy since hes killing English colonials in Africa, except he kills his friend in the movie for no reason at all. That and he dresses a black man but is totally unconvincing. So in conclusion the acting is bad, the characters are lame, the story isn't at all imaginative and its just a big boring waste of time.
The Black Cobra 3 (1990)
Commando pt.2
Compared to the first two this is a masterpiece. The first was bad all around. The second started good and went to crap. This one starts kind of slow but the climax is a hoot. Its pretty much like Commando with a 30 minute finale at the enemy base. Very entertaining and The Hammer has plenty of charm. The scene between him and the chief is so cliché its hilarious. The acting is average, but the dialog is full of one liners. I never get sick of seeing the old knife throw camera trick. Definitely worth the 6 bucks I had to pay. BTW if you see the second and third you will notice they use the same bedroom in each, which is flipping hilarious.
21 Grams (2003)
Am I the only one who hates this film!
So its starts out with a tit. So far so good. Then it follows with a scene. Followed by another scene. And another. Now the problem is they seemingly have nothing to do with each other. You know why? Because this film tries to be tricky. It doesn't want to be the same olé, same olé. The problem being it is. Just because you show a manipulative drama in a scattered order of events doesn't mean you have a masterpiece. It means you have an average plot, boring ass, movie thats hard for old people to follow. If you were to watch Pulp Fiction in regular order it would still be a masterpiece, but this film would be a mediocre, talking heads piece, without any real outstanding dialog. The fact the filmmaker tried to be so pretentious and all you pretentious critics who thinks the editing can make a movie need to stop being so full of crap and give this film what it really deserves.