Reviews

I won't give a rundown of the plot because honestly who cares? The original show is freakin' awesome because it didn't have any filler. Even the filler episodes didn't have any filler. It was also an action comedy, and it was way the hell funnier than any Disney Channel show on the air at that time. It was increasingly surreal as it went along, as well.

This TV movie was *all* filler, and it just wasn't funny.

Casting:

Kim was fine. Weird to see her without green eyes, but she's suitably acrobatic and perky and likeable, but man is she hampered by terrible dialog.

Ron. Was. Awesome! Seriously, while he doesn't look much like the cartoon, he's got the shambling walk down, the mannerisms, and the voice is so good you'd think it was Will Friedle dubbing it. Unfortunately he's given nothing of any importance to do. He's just kind of there. He's the only one who managed to deliver any funny lines in a funny fashion, though.

Wade is fine.

"Athena" is a new character. She's fine. Since she's new we've got nothing to compare her to. She's Kim's new best friend, replacing Monique. I didn't dislike her, but the show is basically about a duo, and when they brought additional people along (Like Monique) it was basically to show how the team ONLY works if it's Ron and Kim.

Like, no, seriously, one episode revolved around a government study to find out WHY it only worked with the two of them.

"And the Mole Rat will be CG!" Rufus turned up to my surprise. He does nothing of any consequence, but he is voiced by Nancy Cartwright, who was his voice in the cartoon as well.

Drakken was terrible. Like beyond terrible. Like I cringed every time he came on screen. For starters, he wasn't even blue! His sights were too low. He wasn't trying to take over Canada, or mind-control the world using shampoo, he just wanted to break Kim's spirit. Big whup. I feel like they didn't even tell the guy he was acting in a TV movie. I feel like they just found some stoned guy in an alleyway, told him, "You're a supervillian!" and he believed them.

Shego doesn't work. Can't figure why, she didn't do anything wrong, but, eh.

Barken was sick and wrong. Barken was voiced by Patrick Warburton in the cartoon, and he was designed to look sorta like Warburton as well. He should have been played by a live-action Patrick Warburton. "Maybe they couldn't afford him?" Of course they could afford him. he's a voice actor. He'll work for peanuts. Hell, as I'm typing this I've got him mopping out my garage. He wanted ten bucks, but I talked him down to $8.95.

The inexplicable fight scene at the end decides to team up Kim....and her grandma....and her mom? Really? Her mom is a brain surgeon, not an action girl. Her grandmother *was* a spy, but long since retired, and she only shows up twice in the entire run of the show, mostly to complain about Kim's clothes.

Anyway: lame. Just lame.

I will admit I went into this film expecting "The Sixth Element," a movie that was similar to, and better than The Fifth Element. I wasn't prepared for, effectively, "The Fourth Element," a movie that is similar to, but inferior to it. While this isn't a terrible film by any means, it's just sugarless and bland. The leads have no charisma or chemistry, the dialog, particularly in the first 10 minute or so, is unbelievably clunky, and it just kind of doesn't work. There are good scenes - Rhianna's minor role is exceptionally good - but on the whole I found myself bored by the film, which is nothing I would have ever thought possible from a Luc Besson picture.

First up: This is a lame pilot movie. Let's get that out of the way. Apart from the scene where they crash in the snow/ice, and the short skirts on the women, there is nothing any good here. But it reminded me of other crappy pilot movies - like, say, "Legends of the Rangers" or that Galactica one that was set during the first Cylon war - that actually had pretty deep and dense story ideas underneath them.

In other words, I feel like someone put a lot of thought into the universe that this story was set in, which might have been an interesting playground, but then they utterly fumbled the ball with this dopey TV movie.