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Reviews
The Golem (2018)
Horrible
So slow it's more entertaining to watch a newly painted wall dry, acting as bad as anything I've ever witnessed, boring story and nobody cares for the characters one bit.
And since we all know what military budget gets fatter by people paying for this crap, I suggest you skip this one.
The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey (2012)
Reflections after seeing The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey
First of all, let me say I'm a great fan of all of Tolkiens works. Silmarillion is being read like the bible in my house, and yet I can't feel satisfied with this first part of The Hobbit.
It is much more true to the book than the previous LOTR trilogy, which is a great plus. Another thing worth mentioning is the CGI, at parts fantastic, but as well with some flaws that kind of annoyed me a little, such as some of the dark spawn and their pets. Since the original story is such a fantastic tale of the bravery found in places never even considered, it is hard to make anything else than a solid story for this adaption. But I feel there are some lack of commitment from some of the cast. Most of the actors (females are pretty much none existent) does a good job with the characters, but I can't feel with the characters as I did in the LOTR trilogy, which I was pretty critical of from the beginning due to not following the books properly (you who actually read the books knows what I mean), but those actors made you feel for them, regardless.
But what really made this movie just a good fantasy flick instead of a great one, is the first hour or so. If you ever watched the British soap opera "Emmerdale", this looks pretty much the same. The camera work felt under par for this part, though the settings are pretty nice. The other thing I would like to criticize is the many Jar-Jar Binks turning up here. He was funny for the first 5 minutes of Star Wars ep 1, but here we gets plenty of the same thing. My guess to why? For selling as much merch as possible to kids and their parents of course, there are no other explanation since a majority probably agrees with me; Jar-Jar is lame.
This movie is really hyped, I get that, and as a side effect this movie will and have gained a much higher rating here on IMDb than it deserved. I give it a 7 for a solid effort, but in some ways it lacks the depth that Tolkiens masterpiece provides, and that is a big shame.
edit: There seems to be lots of people that doesn't find this review useful. Never mind those negative voters since those most certainly are in the category of people that hails everything that Hollywood produces, no matter what. As long as the budget is gigantic and the CGI is massive, those people are satisfied. This review is not for those people. This review are for those who actually intend to use their own brains, even if it is just for a slight second.
The Hunger Games (2012)
gonna watch kids killing kids? watch Battle Royal instead of this
I'm gonna keep it short. If you've seen Battle Royal, you know what an awesome movie that is. This is the idea of Battle Royal, made in to something looking like Twilight. It is slow, lacks action and a couple of hours of My Little Pony would give me the same feeling. It is certainly cute, but with a story like this, there should be a LOT more made out of it.
So, it is slow, it is cute, what else is there to it, really? not much, honestly. The acting is about average, the camera work is good and the director seems to have done what was expected.
If I can really recommend it? Yes I can. If you like movies such as Twilight, you will probably enjoy this. But it is way to girlish for me, and I believe most males watching this will say the same thing. It is a decent movie, but wtf, if ppl gonna get murdered, give me some darn blood!
If you are thinking about watching this, but haven't seen Battle Royal, I would have to say skip this one and go for the original story. It is waaaaay much better
Nude Nuns with Big Guns (2010)
I enjoyed it pretty much!
I actually got kinda p!$$ed at all the negative reviews this movie had. IT Ain't THAT BAD PEOPLE!! it is actually a pretty decent watch without being fancy in any way, taking a big step away from the norm and making a whole lot out of a pretty small budget.
most of those leaving negative votes and reviews are probably falling into one of two categories: 1) those who can't enjoy a film unless the budget matches Titanic and the entire film need to smell like Hollywood 2) those who actually can't read since the title pretty much says it all
this film IS about nuns and the use of big guns, even says so in the title, and it's pretty violent and if you DO love violence, WATCH IT! I'm not gonna pretend it's the best film ever made, not even close! but it sure as hell ain't bad, and probably are better than 80% of all standard Hollywood productions, and it's worth lots more than under 4 on the IMDb-rating
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows - Part 1 (2010)
so bad my eyes are about to bleed
I'm gonna keep this short since there's not really much to say. I can't say I'm a fan of the previous movies in the series, nor the books actually (and I really really do love fantasy) but the latest segment in the series must be one of the slowest paced movies I've ever seen, and it gave me absolutely NOTHING! well, thats a lie, it gave me more than 2 hours of building up rage, why the hell did I put myself through this?
well, anyhow, I'm pretty upset left here wondering "how the hell can u make a shitty movie like this trying to get people to pay to watch it?" 'cause there actually aren't anything in this movie, at all, making it worth a watch (and lucky me, I didn't pay at all).
instead of giving these turds of filmmakers one single dime, just go watch an old school classic like Willow or something instead. this is NOT worth the time (and all those positive reviews are mainly because of one thing: Hollywoods usual brainwash of its audience)
well, this was all written in anger so the grammar and spelling is probably as shite as the movie itself was and for that, I apologize
Venom (2005)
Hell yeah or Hell no...
Venom is to me, an above average flick which brings u flashbacks to the good ol' -80's when every horror movie was like this, with the big difference, this one is pretty good.
The director made a descent job out of a descent material, the actors acted... well, pretty descent, and the story was nothing original.
Still, this is a movie worth a watch... That is if u like oldies like Frida the 13th and similar movies. Remember to see it with an open mind, just as usual, and don't expect to much. But anyways, I prefer this one if I had to chose between it and the lame ass Lord of the rings trilogy any day, any time.
so go rent it!.... or if ur really in to these kinda flicks, maybe buy it :)
The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring (2001)
"goin for westfold are ya ?"
This is a good film, no doubt, but, for me (as for many other REAL fans, not just those who read and enjoyed but actually LIVED in Tolkiens marvelous books) this came out (just as expected) kinda short.. Way to many things have been deleted from the actual story. It is only a third of the book actually shown, and that really pisses me off. What is the idea of making a movie based upon a book if the movie misses the most valid parts? The world of J.R.R Tolkien isn't just the story about these hobbits and the rest of the characters shown in this (and the other two) movies, it is a WORLD filled with people. the WORLD has a STORY of it's OWN, and thats where Jackson failed... totally! To me this could just as well be a Conan movie (Arnold Schwarzenegger) since u don't get to know the world the cute hobbits and vicious orcs lives in and that is sad sad sad. Considering this, I can't, not even if someone put a gun to my head trying to force me, give this movie more than a 6 out of 10. To destroy and ruin Tolkiens works with this "halfway-garbage" should lead to 10 years in the worst possible place (maybe Detroit?) for dear Mr Jackson. If you people want to see good movies by this man, check out his earlier movies Braindead (one of the funniest movies ever made) and Bad Taste (Grandfather of all splatter/horror/comedies) where he really does what he is best at, with small means making gr8 movies!