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2/10
Skips over the important parts
15 May 2023
The acting is superb from everyone. Mikkel Boe Følsgaard, Mads Mikkelsen, and Alicia Vikander are all standouts.

However, I must knock stars for historical inaccuracy. With so much focus on the "affair" they skip over Struensee's actions. He dissolved the council and took advantage of a mentally ill man in the pursuit of social reform. All of that is lost by framing his imprisonment as mainly from the affair and his belief in reform is lost by him reversing the lifting of censorship. Not to mention they the ending more "noble" than it was. The film tries to make a story of power into a story of romance, but even with the great acting I could never forget the truth.
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5/10
Does not age well, is fine
6 May 2023
Overall I like the concept of the characters and think the acting is top quality, however parts of the show doesn't age well. Besides pregnant women drinking wine/smoking, the episode about the sex worker gets narrowly close to the virgin/madonna cliches I'm so sick of. It is a fun time capsule of technology, the characters explain how the Internet works a few times and are surrounded by non-smart phones. There's some good episodes and some weak episodes, but overall fine.

I disliked the romance between Lynley and Helen until they recasted the actress and I realized how much I preferred the first Helen - I truly bought that she was neurotic phycologist but the later Helen leans too much into "perfect woman" to make the ending of their relationship that much tragic. As much as I thought their dysfunctional relationship took up to much time, I did like the portrayal of Helen as extremely dysfunctional.

The best episodes are "Well Schooled in Murder" and "In the Presence of the Enemy".
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Strange World (2022)
4/10
Too many family fights, little payoff
1 January 2023
Warning: Spoilers
I went into this thinking it was an animated "Lost in Space" from the one trailer I saw. It is not, they do not go to space.

This film is in a long list of "fantasy that your parents apologize to you for generational harm" like Turning Red and Encanto. The film is a lot of family arguing.

In addition to arguments, the show is a lot of "show" don't "tell " The biggest issue is the son's desire to not be a farmer isn't portrayed favorably. Like what, he likes causing people to get into dangerous situations? And the mom sees him almost die and says that's good vibes? None of that arc is satisfying.

I assume many of the low ratings are because the son is gay. While I don't have a problem with queer characters, the arc didn't make any sense. The kid is too nervous to ask out the guy he likes. The show never teachss how to do something, even when you're nervous, or get over that nervousness. The son gets a happy ending but we're not told how this happen ending takes place.

Beyond the dropped nervousness plot, there's an arc of the Dad being afraid his son will abandon him just like his dad. In the end, the son chooses to stay in the down below. We never get a scene of the Dad accepting his son for leaving. We also don't get any actions about the Dad not letting the son go. A better way to have shown this would be the friends want to go an explorer trip, Dad says no you can't leave, and the son realizes it's because his Dad was abandoned by his grandfather.

I'm conflicted on the scene we're the Dad forgives his dad for the abandonment. That ends to happy for how that actually happens in real life. But I guess we want it to be happy so it happens.

Overall, this wasn't as pleasent or fun as I wanted. The comedy fell short and the plot fell short.

If people are looking for a son explorer animated movie, I suggest Treasure Planet, The Good Dinosaur, or Atlantis. Yep, I said the Good Dinosaur. I think that feels with family relationship better than this movie with a less convoluted setting.
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Hotel Portofino (2022– )
1/10
Poor script doesn't do justice to time period
29 November 2022
Warning: Spoilers
This airy tv show had very pretty shots of the water and Italian/Croatian coast, however the script is poor. Many of the plotlines are painful to watch because the characters are unlikable and doesn't do justice to pre-WW2 Italy.

The show would be better with no nanny. Have the initial fish out of water as Alice, the possible bride. There's a lot of characters and some of them should have been cut to give everyone proper time for characterization. Mainly, more screen time needed to be given to "downstairs" to flesh out the Italian characters.

I hate when a show has information the characters know but is hidden from the viewer. Multiple times something happens off screen and we are not told about it, because to tell us would change the story. For instance, the nanny tells the cook why she's in Italy but we don't get to know what she told the cook. It's very frustrating as it's quite obvious why she's in Italy. The tension should come from the characters' relationships, not hiding the ball from the viewer.

  • Owner - one of the few nice characters but lacks an arc. If it had been hotel dream versus marriage, that could work. Or maybe an optimistic, delusional rich woman who thinks she can run a hotel but is struggling. Her character isn't as well defined as Lord Grantham. On top of all of this, we see her horribly abused by a husband when we don't understand why she stays.


  • Owner's husband - money grubbing villain and all of his scenes are painful because it's like watching a car crash


  • Lucian, owner son - he's an entitled asshole yet we're supposed to like him?


  • Indian doctor - I wish he had a little more purpose than "sad gay". Maybe they could have given him a job? Like he's working on a thesis paper but it's all an excuse to be near Lucian.


  • new nanny - This should have been season 2.


  • Italian maid - wish she got more lines. They could have done this by having 1-2 more servants (a kitchen maid and a taxi driver). Her arc of being in love with the son makes sense.


  • Italian bell hop - we don't get enough characterization. Would have helped to have actual downstairs scenes.


  • Owner's daughter - crowded out of the story by the nanny. They don't need both characters.


  • Aunt and ward - I like them. Solid arc of finding youth in Italy.


  • Alice's mom - I liked her as a villain but I wanted a backstory to humanize or explain her decisions


  • Alice - I was expecting more backstory


  • Mystery Art Man - this plot was so slow. Should have been max 1 episode


  • Mystery Art Man Girlfriend - I like her plot as the hedonistic American trying to live life like it's the last because of war trauma. I do think we got too much male gaze and not enough historical explanation.


  • Tennis man and wife - why did this need to be added?


  • Town Fascists - nowhere near enough character development


  • Italian count - nowhere near enough character development.


All in all, the show needed a more defined downstairs. There's a lot of history to dive into with post-WW1 and pre-WW2 Italy and we got very little historical explanation with many of the Italian characters feeling 1-note as not enough time was dedicated to character development.
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5/10
Travelogue Romance with a side of cringe
18 November 2022
This is a nice rom com with a great start, a fun set of possible suitors, funny and complex female friendships, and a style of rom com not often seen today (the travelogue). However, a lot of the comedy is second hand embarrassment style comedy as the characters keep getting into awkward situations so I'm docking points for the amount of "omg no" that happened.

At two hours, it's a little too long and sometimes the adr is a little off, but wow those shots of Rome! Nowadays those streets would be filled with lots of people. As cheesy as some of the travelogue shots can be, it's a beautiful snapshot in time.
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1/10
Very odd
16 November 2022
All of the jokes seem to be based on "oh look! A woman having sex! How funny!." Only the movie is instead rampant sexual harassment, sexual manipulation, and sex shaming. There isn't any satire of period dramas or greed.

I could see where this movie was trying to go as a gold-digger realizing her true love is a thief is narratively satisfying, but it never even comes close to anything funny or satirical.

Thank you to all the reviewers pointing this was made only because of the success of Tom Jones. I have not seen the movie but looking at the failure of Joseph Andrews, it appears Tom Jones is lighting in a bottle that can't be captured. There's a fine line between "ooh this is a sexy comedy" and "this is unfunny." The Amorous Adventures of Moll Flanders is unfunny and pointless.
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Black Adam (2022)
3/10
Good actors, Bad plot
14 November 2022
Warning: Spoilers
Aldis Hodge was a great Hawkman!!! Best live action version of that character.

The backgrounds look like cut scenes from 2000s video games (or the Scorpion Game) and the lore dumps were painful. This should have been a 90 minute movie with none of that lore exposition until the last act. The entire beginning with the slaves and political talk was painful after seeing how artfully that's been handles in other movies.

I would have preferred this movie to just have Hawkman & Black Adam team up against mercenaries instead of all the extra weird plot stuff. Kahndaq is suppose to be Sinai ruled by mercenaries but that doesn't make sense. Even in countries with large mercenary control there's always at least a fake government. They should have started with a map showing where this fictional country is (modern day Sinai, Egypt) and introduce us by showing the oppression of the citizens via mercenaries and the reverence to the statue. Cut to the mom reseructing Adam. All this in the cold open. Then Adam gors on a bad ramage of the mercs. Hawkman volunteers and goes and tries to stop him, fails, and then tries to convince him to be good. Boom - we now have anti-hero tension. Hawkman has to address whether due process is really working in fake Sinai and Black Adam has to realize that simply killing everyone in power doesn't work. But instead we got a 2 hour mess of a plot with an amazing cast. Oh well.
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2/10
Really Plodding
3 November 2022
Gertrude Bell had a very exciting life and was a key player in the Partition of the Ottoman Empire. However, about 50% of this movie is slow plodding of James Franco and Nicole Kidman who have 0 chemistry even though Kidman tries her best. Franco's performance is so wooden, no wonder reviews when this was released in theater focus on Robert Pattinson. R-Pat as Lawrence of Arabia was refreshing in this bad script.

I think it was a mistake to focus on Bell's love life instead of making a thesis about Bell's great mistake (not supporting the Kurds) or her great success (the antiquity law). This script is boring with the slow pacing.
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5/10
Good Kids Show
11 October 2022
This is a very good kids show. I don't think it has quite enough content to be adult documentary worthy but it does have as much content as Vox shorts while being fast and visually appealing. It is just a list of things JVN is interested in so could feel like a YouTube series, but it's extremely well produced. A perfect ease to get a younger generation into documentary and non-fiction work. Personally, I wish the content was more graph based (I wanted a table based on the figure skating jumps) but the visual text are very helpful and engaging. Overall, I highly suggest parents watch this with their young kids to help jump start or continue a love of nonfiction.
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1/10
This is bad with good actors
25 September 2022
This movie has a bad script and bad sets, yet Gypsy Lee Rose and Paulette Goddard still hit their comedy beats and look gorgeous. There's an interesting comedy here somewhere but it doesn't land with the bad script (and white washed casting). I'm surprised this wasn't more of a musical. There's only one dance sequence and the cinematography is very poor so it's not even worth it. I guess it's simply bad because they tried to do this on the cheap without putting the money into better casting, better sets, better dance numbers, and better filming.

I do like the discussion of women's equality in a 1952 movie delivered with the stars try humor. They deserved better.
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The Paradise (2012–2013)
5/10
Enjoyable but unromantic
8 September 2022
Warning: Spoilers
I love department store shows (Mr. Selfridge, Are you being served) but while The Paradise has beautiful costumes and a tight set, the episode plotlines are frustrating.

The second episode features a false accusation of sexual assault which is unwatchable after #metoo.

The third episode has a heartbreaking but realistic plot line about the limitations of women in this time period but, again, features a sex assault plotline that offers up either (1) a glaring plot hole or (2) makes a reoccurring character seems like an absolute asshole. While I realize #2 is historically accurate, this is supposed to be a light and fluffy version of Mr. Selfridge.

The show is based on Au Bonheur des Dames by Emile Zola so has an impressive origin. I wish the love triangle had been less of a focus of the show, as it's less of a focus in the book. The book version of Morary learns to stop being a womanizer early on and it's played for laughs. Here, they make Morary too much like Selfridge in his love life, in other words, unlikable. Zola wrote the books as a commentary on a woman finding financial freedom in the same structure that is trying to trap them. There was always a romantic, happy element to his novel. I never got that same lightness from Morary and Denise's relationship.
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Made of Honor (2008)
1/10
This is why Hallmark doesn't get political
1 September 2022
The Bill Clinton jokes were not funny and book end this movie. Overall this movie is Hallmark level except the bad political humor. Sydney Pollack was great and the additional guy scenes were refreshing, but overall, the main characters are unlikeable and it's not all that romantic.

My Best Friend's Wedding did this better. Especially because Patrick Dempsey's character never has a true breakdown or change, it's not satisfying improvement. Not to mention, there's a current of male toxicity that runs throughout the entire movie, it's not really pleasant. Even if Syndey has good comedic timing and the soundtrack is good.
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6/10
Jumped the Shark with Richard of Shrewsbury storyline
31 August 2022
Warning: Spoilers
I liked the beginning a lot, especially the chemistry between the two leads and the sparring mothers, but the point where they decided to not follow history and instead made Richard of York be real and have survived was too much. Perkin Warbeck was a pretender. In 1497 Warbeck landed in Cornwall with a few thousand troops, but was soon captured and executed, none of this extraneous plot about curses or the real Richard was a thing. Also, it was Henry VII that ordered the death of the Princes in the Tower, not his mother. This was simply to make the attractive lead seem more attractive and is historically inaccurate. I realize that Gregory believes Warbeck's claim was genuine, but I do not as most of academia believes Warbeck was a pretender.
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DC's Legends of Tomorrow (2016–2022)
5/10
American superhero Doctor Who
25 August 2022
Of Season 1, I really enjoyed the pilot and Night of the Hawk. Captain Cold and Arthur Darvill characters are great. The entire vibe is like Doctor Who but more complicated and more American. Very enjoyable but I wish there were more time period pieces instead of CW show connections.
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1/10
The cast deserved better in a movie very "of it's time"
4 August 2022
Warning: Spoilers
I really enjoyed Lucile Gleason as the aunt from the west. The whole start of this film is quite charming. A woman has resigned herself to a milktoast marriage because isn't that the best women should expect in life. The aunt whose in town for a rodeo is supportive but disapproving while her and brother don't quite know how to connect with the bride-to-be and greatly feel the loss of her mother. It's all quite moving! Walk in Bing Crosby and Bob Burns, two cowboys employed by the aunt. That should be a great set-up for a meet-cure in New York and then later love on the range while Frances Farmer's character discovers passion and her worth out in the west.

Instead this movie is a LOT of racial stereotypes, bad western stereotypes, and very little actual ranching. The bad racial stereotypes leave no one untouched.

I think a remake of this film would be great. It's already like a lot of Hallmark movies, it just needs to be cleaned up. The racism and bad ranching makes this unbearable.

For more detail on the cast, Lucile Gleason was one of the founding members of SAG, Bing Crosby needs no introduction, this is Bob Burns first movie with Bing, and Frances Farmer famously suffered under medical control similar to Britney Spears.
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Oasis (2017 TV Movie)
8/10
I'm sad this never got made!
4 August 2022
I'm so sad this didn't get picked up! I would totally read a book version of this, it's great!

Two notes: the blue lighting was too much like a videogame, it made some things look cheap. Also Zawe was a huge miscast if she's going to be a love interest. If she's a drug dealer who eventually gets a timely end, I could work with that. But doctor at the end of her wits? No way. Her performance wasn't sympathetic at all and was played more like a villain. And I'm worried that wasn't the intention.
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1/10
One of my least favorite Barbie movies
2 August 2022
The familiar is ugly and doesn't help the plot at all. The arc of Barbie's character helps all the girls get along by choosing her as the chosen one isn't a great message but is also just as boring to watch as general fantasy chosen one stories. Here, the adults choose not to act, putting it all on the inexperienced young fairies. Strong "Dumbledore is the problem" vibes from Azura and Enchantress. To top it off, there isn't any good songs and the magic system is never explained (suddenly Barbie can do magic even though she's been previously a squib). I'm surprised this was a series (this is the third installment) but I guess those fairies wings must have been a huge seller for Mattel. In general it's one of the least aesthetically pleasing barbie movies which is why the doll outfits are slightly different and there are fewer cosplayers from this.

Strong hit and a miss.
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The Heat's On (1943)
4/10
Stepping Stone in Musical Movie History
2 August 2022
Mae West and Hazel Scott both have great numbers in this loosely constructed plot which is mostly a showcase for different songs and acts, halfway between vaudeville follies and the more structured musicals of the 50s and 60s.
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Austenland (2013)
2/10
But what did the characters learn?
1 August 2022
The premise is quite fun and I did laugh at some of the comedy. The costumes and sets are very immersive. However, I don't know what the point was. In normal rom-coms, and well, any story, the characters learn something and become better versions of themselves or discover something within them. While Jane taking control of her story should be growth of somebody who's finally going to learn and stand up for themselves, one might make parallels with Persuasion here, she already did that by purchasing the tickets to the theme park. She's not a true wall flower. She's much more of a Lizzie Bennett. I never really felt that any of the characters grew as people.

The shallowness of the characters is also been mentioned. I thought the two other theme park goers were going to have more of a backstory that adds into. Maybe why someone would want escapism or why they would want to attend a theme park.

But the real knocks of stars comes from the repeated sexual assault or attempted sexual assault that occurs in this film. It was very uncomfortable.
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Persuasion (I) (2022)
1/10
Zero Chemistry Between Leads
21 July 2022
Why wasn't Henry Golding playing Wentworth??? Dakota Johnson and Cosmo have 0 chemistry. Which hey, 2 for 2 for Dakota Johnson in not having chemistry with the romantic lead of a book adaptation. The script does neither of these actors any favors.

Also, I didn't find the movie funny and it misses the point of the book. Literally changes the character of Wentworth.
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Come and See (1985)
1/10
The more time passes, the more twee this becomes
7 July 2022
I was suggested to watch this film by some online as one of the best depictions of the brutality of war. While this film is very violent, it is also part of the long history of men making movies about genocide through the eyes of children in a very twee perspective. While not as "light" as "A Beautiful Life" or "Boy in the Striped Pajamas," nor as surrealist as "JoJo Rabbit," the film still maintains child-like disassociation.

The book that inspired this movie is an oral history of people who survived the Nazi massacre of Belarus villages. From my understanding, this writer thought that the book was not enough to convey the horribleness of the experience. I disagree, and would have preferred a documentary or a straight retelling. I have read a film analysis essay that says that this is a very American sentiment as we prefer our war movies to be linear and lack surrealist or romantic elements. This film's focus on the children and their love is part of a long history of Soviet filmmaking. Additionally, the streamnof conciseness interpretation of the oral histories is a part of a long history of Belarusian processing of this trauma. Maybe this is just not meant for me as an American. I would like a linear documentary over twee romantic violence.

Overall, I disagree with the person who suggested this movie to me. The films that teach us the most about horror of war are documentaries. Real stories. Not fictional stories. And I especially hate war stories from the eyes of children that involve any "cuteness."

Lastly, I'd like to add that I could not find a film analysis or review that had ever followed up with the female actress, only the male primary actor. With the self-described violence of the filmmaking process by the director and male actor, I worry this is part of a long history of fillmakers who abused people on set for their "art."
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White Nights (1957)
1/10
Pretty set design, Chauvinistic dialogue
7 July 2022
Warning: Spoilers
I don't know why this movie was on my to watch list. I really liked the sets, the entire film is very atmospheric. The staging of movement within these small sets creates magic. For recreating an Italian city in a small warehouse and make it seem like a dark fantasy is wonderful.

However, the dialogue of this movie is extremely patriarchal and chauvinistic. In the first 20 minutes, this film had every line that is horrible towards women. I don't know what's worse, "you're too pretty to jump off a bridge" or "if you hadn't run away from me, a creepy stranger, you'd never gotten sexually harassed!". Probably the latter.

The acting and sets are great in this classic retelling of "guy meets girl, girl is pinning over man, guy looses girl" the actual dialogue is horrible and unromantic. They're much better versions of this story that are actually romantic. Personally, Once is a better version of "white nights" as there the man isn't a sex creep like this one.
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1/10
Mae Wear is funny even though the rest is horrible
23 June 2022
There is poorly filmed, written, and acted. On the other hand, Make Wear is very funny.

The cutting in of older movies comes out really bad in the movie, but it is a distinctive style so is at least interesting art even though it's bad art.
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1/10
New adaption is better
23 June 2022
I was going to title this, the remake is better. However, since this is based off of a middle age ballad everything is a remake since everything is an adaption of the classic story. Hear the movie changes much of the story. After seeing a movie that is true to the poem as much as possible, I can't enjoy this version at all. The changes, such as how the lead first cuts off the head of the green night and the ending, all undercut the message of the original story.
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Heathers (1988)
2/10
Birth of a genre is not worth it
23 June 2022
I realize this film is one of the main reasons we have dark satire teen movies, but I didn't find it funny at all. I love Cry Baby (1990) and Drop Dead Gorgeous (1999). Everyone, from Mean Girls to Scream, have done this style better. I wasn't a huge fan of But I'm a Cheerleader (I'm not the target audience) but at least that got some laughs out of me. Here - absolutely no comedy.

Also, while the ending of this film is meaningful, the alternative ending would have been more realistic. A lot of the plot point about being frustrated with cruelty of adults and the arc of Christian Slater's character never get their true climax. The movie tries to be funny and fails and it tries to be edgy and never gets there. The reason why Rebel Without A Cause was so impactful was because the edge was always there. In other words, this movie spawned a genre but is a flat piece of art we can leave in the 1980s.
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