The Last House on the Left (1972)
Richard Towers: Dr. John Collingwood
Photos
Quotes
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Estelle Collingwood : Are you folks on vacation?
Krug Stillo : No, we're sort of, um, on a business trip.
Dr. John Collingwood : Well what sort of business are you in?
Fred "Weasel" Podowski : Plumbing.
Krug Stillo : Insurance.
Estelle Collingwood : Well, which is it?
Sadie : You see, we're actually in both. We sell insurance to plumbing companies. You know, in case they steal some toilets or something.
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Dr. John Collingwood : [looking at Mari's shirt] Hey, no bra?
Mari : Of course not! Nobody wears those anymore!
Estelle Collingwood : Nobody except us drill sergeants.
Dr. John Collingwood : Yeah, but look, Estelle. You can see her nipples as plain as day!
Mari : Daddy, don't be so clinical!
Dr. John Collingwood : But it's immodest!
Mari : Then I'll get some sandpaper!
Estelle Collingwood : [annoyed] Look, young lady, when I was your age...
Mari : When you were my age, you all wore brassieres that made your tits stick out like torpedoes or something.
Dr. John Collingwood : Tits! What's this "tits" business? Sounds like I'm back in the barracks.
Mari : Alright, then - mammary glands! They used to tie them up like little lunatics in straightjackets, and they stuffed socks in their bras.
Estelle Collingwood : Mari!
Mari : You told me that yourself, Mother.
Estelle Collingwood : If God had meant women to go around with their bust exposed, Mari Collingwood, He wouldn't have given us clothes!
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Dr. John Collingwood : You call the repair service?
Estelle Collingwood : Mmhmmm.
Dr. John Collingwood : Well did you tell them I was a physician and had to have a phone?
Estelle Collingwood : No, actually I told them you were an international bookie, and I was ten-months pregnant with quintuplets!
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Krug Stillo : Are you sure we're not going to put you folks to any trouble?
Dr. John Collingwood : Oh, nonsense! Our home is yours.