The Cleveland Show (TV Series)
Harder, Better, Faster, Browner (2010)
Mike Henry: Cleveland Brown, Rallo Tubbs, Bruce the Performance Artist, Dwayne Meighan, Guy Who Uses a Breadstick as a Phone
Quotes
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Cleveland Brown : [after discovering Kenny and Candice sleeping in Kenny's car] Kenny, you're... you're homeless.
Kenny West : Shh! Man, not in front of my kid. I told her that cars were houses and houses were cars, so she just thinks we're car-less.
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Donna Tubbs : [to Cleveland] I'll always be your first lady.
Cleveland Brown : Not to brag, but you're more like my sixth lady.
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Cleveland Brown : [to Kenny] Hey, you should bring Candice over for a playdate.
Kenny West : Hmm. That's actually not a bad idea. I got a gig this afternoon anyway.
Cleveland Brown : I'll treat her like she's one of my own and I mean my own, not one of my stepkids. Sometimes I forget to feed them.
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Kenny West : [to Donna] Hey, Miss Tubbs. I got you a little thank you gift for letting me and Candice crash at your place.
[gives her a bottle of wine]
Donna Tubbs : Oh, my God. "Tyler Perry Presents Wine."
Cleveland Brown : They say it's rich and super fruity and not complex at all.
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Cleveland Brown : [bursts into the bedroom while Donna is asleep] Donna, wake up! The house is on fire! Rallo's dead!
Donna Tubbs : [jumps out of bed] What? Oh, my God, no! My baby! My baby!
Cleveland Brown : Ha-ha-ha. Just kidding.
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Kenny West : Cleveland, you're fired.
Cleveland Brown : What?
Kenny West : I''m sorry, but the book I read said if you've got bad news, come right out and say it. No, you're supposed to first give them a fake compliment, then the bad news.
Cleveland Brown : Oh.
Kenny West : You've lost weight and you're fired.
Cleveland Brown : Well, at least I've lost weight.
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Cleveland Brown : [while on the news] Barack Obama doesn't care about black people.
[Everyone is shocked at his comment]
Kenny West : [to Cleveland] What the fuck were you thinking?
Cleveland Brown : I don't know. The lights, the camera. I got nervous.
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Rallo Tubbs : [while at a restaurant] Attention, men. If your ladies are in the bathroom and you wish for just once in your life you had the cajones to just get up and leave, follow me.
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Cleveland Brown : [about Barack Obama] You know what, Donna? He may live in the White House, but I'd rather live in the Brown house.
Donna Tubbs : I'd rather live in the White House.
Cleveland Brown : Yeah, me too.