The Big Bang Theory (TV Series)
The Scavenger Vortex (2013)
Johnny Galecki: Leonard Hofstadter
Photos
Quotes
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Bernadette Rostenkowski : How am I faster than you? I'm in heels, *and* I stopped to take a phone call!
Leonard Hofstadter : I have asthma. Back off!
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[first lines]
Raj Koothrappali : So. Couldn't help but notice. None of you RSVP'd to my murder mystery dinner party.
Leonard Hofstadter : Oh yeah. We were meaning to do that.
Raj Koothrappali : No you weren't, because it was a week ago and nobody came! So if you want to solve the mystery of who stabbed Koothrappali in the back with the weapon of indifference, it was all of you.
Sheldon Cooper : Don't think that qualifies as a mystery. We all knew what we were doing.
Amy Farrah Fowler : We're sorry, Rajesh.
Bernadette Rostenkowski : Maybe we can do it next week.
Howard Wolowitz : Whoa, whoa, not that sorry.
Raj Koothrappali : Don't worry, I can take a hint. No more murder mystery parties.
Sheldon Cooper : Great.
Leonard Hofstadter : Thank you.
Howard Wolowitz : Hallelujah.
Raj Koothrappali : Because I've got something better planned!
Howard Wolowitz , Leonard Hofstadter , Amy Farrah Fowler : Aaw.
Sheldon Cooper : Come on.
Raj Koothrappali : Just hear me out. I'm going to make you guys a scavenger hunt like they have at M.I.T.
Howard Wolowitz : Oh, I loved those. I did them every year there.
Leonard Hofstadter : We did them at Princeton too.
Howard Wolowitz : Oh, that's cute. Like it's a real college.
Sheldon Cooper : Amusing. I was going to say that about M.I.T., but it works for Princeton, too.
Amy Farrah Fowler : Scavenger hunts at Harvard we're really tough. I always got stuck on the first challenge; trying to find someone to be on a team with me.
[laughs]
Amy Farrah Fowler : I guess that story's more sad than funny.
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Leonard Hofstadter : I'm okay with you driving my car; I'm not okay with you flying my car.
Bernadette Rostenkowski : Don't sweat it; my dad's a cop; used to fix things.
Leonard Hofstadter : Uh-huh. Like *death*.
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Raj Koothrappali : Okay, guys, go ahead and divide yourselves into teams of two.
Bernadette Rostenkowski : Should we just do couples?
Leonard Hofstadter : Couples sounds great, or we could mix things up. Maybe pick names out of a hat; whatever.
Penny : Whoa, whoa, whoa. Why don't you just admit you don't want to be on a team with me?
Leonard Hofstadter : I just said couples sound great.
Penny : Hm-mm. Yeah. You don't think I'm smart enough. You just think I'm going to be a liability. Even though I totally just used liability correctly in a sentence.
[Amy nods at her]
Leonard Hofstadter : So, let's do couples. I want to.
Penny : No, no, no. Let's mix things up. I choose Sheldon; we're going to kick your ass.
Sheldon Cooper : Really? The only time I'm ever picked first for a team, and I'm stuck with the liability.
Amy Farrah Fowler : Stop that. Penny is not a liability.
Penny : Thank you. Do you want to be on my team?
Amy Farrah Fowler : Maybe we pick names out of a hat?
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Bernadette Rostenkowski : Quitting would be the worst thing for your relationship.
Leonard Hofstadter : Why?
Bernadette Rostenkowski : Because it would make you seem like something she already thinks you are.
Leonard Hofstadter : What does she think I am?
Bernadette Rostenkowski : How do I put this? She's been known to call you a name that usually applies to a lady part... Or a cat... Or a willow.
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Leonard Hofstadter : Hey, Penny, I just wanted to say good luck, and I hope there's no hard feelings.
Bernadette Rostenkowski : [angrily] Hey!
[punches Leonard in the chest hard]
Bernadette Rostenkowski : Romeo! Repair your relationship on your own time!
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[everyone is shocked at Raj about the outcome of the game]
Leonard Hofstadter : [tiredly] Are you kidding me?
Penny : [incredulously] That is the stupidest thing I've ever heard.
Bernadette Rostenkowski : [huffing] You suck... so hard!
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Penny : [to Leonard] You know, I'm surprised you want to copy my answers since I'm not even smart enough to be on your team.
Leonard Hofstadter : Well, why would you want to be on someone's team who you like to call a... I can't even say it in front of Sheldon.
Penny : What are you talking about?
Leonard Hofstadter : You know exactly what I'm talking about.
Bernadette Rostenkowski : No, he doesn't. I just made that up.
Leonard Hofstadter : Why would you do that?
Bernadette Rostenkowski : Because you were about to quit like a big... Sheldon, cover your ears.
Sheldon Cooper : I'm not a child. I know the word "ninny".
Penny : [to Leonard] Yeah, well, you should have quit 'cause I'm still gonna beat your ass.