Family Guy (TV Series)

Once Bitten (2015)

Seth MacFarlane: Peter Griffin, Brian Griffin, Stewie Griffin, Glenn Quagmire, Tom Tucker

Photos 

Quotes 

• Brian Griffin : [after Peter tries to get him to take the suppository]  Peter, get away from my ass!

• Peter Griffin : Lois, can you pour my juice? I can't lift my arm.

  Lois Griffin : I still can't believe Brian bit you. It just doesn't seem like him.

  Stewie Griffin : Oh, because you know him so well...! Shut your faaaaaaace.

• Brian Griffin : Hey, no, no.

  Peter Griffin : No, no, Brian. No, no. You win. You win. I quit. It's your liver; you do whatever you want.

  Brian Griffin : Yes, it *is* my liver, and I don't want to take that pill.

  Peter Griffin : Fine. We're both in agreement. So let's just both watch TV. And nothing else

  Brian Griffin : Sounds good to me.

  Peter Griffin : I'm glad you think it sounds good.

  [sighs] 

  Peter Griffin : It's nice to watch TV when you have nothing else to do, isn't it?

  Brian Griffin : Yeah.

  Peter Griffin : [forcing Brian to take the suppository]  Get over here, you idiot!

  [grabs Brian] 

  Brian Griffin : [struggles to get free]  Peter! What the hell?

  Peter Griffin : I'm still in charge of you!

  Brian Griffin : Get away from me! I'm a human!

  Peter Griffin : This is for *your* benefit, so just go limp and take it!

  Brian Griffin : You touch my ass, I swear to God I'll kill ya !

  [Peter inserts the suppository, Brian screams, growls then bites peter] 

  Peter Griffin : [screams]  Wha... What the hell?

  [surveys Bloodied arm] 

  Peter Griffin : You... you bit me!

  Brian Griffin : You're damn right I did! And I'll do it again if you don't stay the hell away from my ass!

  Peter Griffin : But, Brian, the vet said...

  [growls, Peter gasps and runs away] 

  Brian Griffin : [empowered, tail wagging]  Wow, where did that come from? I feel more powerful than a lesbian's crotch.

  Valet : [cut away to Lesbian biker outside a building]  Ooh, sorry, ma'am, we don't valet motorcycles.

  Lesbian Biker : Don't need to!

  [carries bike with crotch] 

• Stewie Griffin : Yes, looks like someone's gone after him with a wHip.

  Brian Griffin : [in a submissive voice]  That's a perfectly valid way of saying that.