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Midsomer Murders: Midsomer Life (2008)
An Almost Prefect Episode
Off-roaders clearing a path for their vehicles discover the body of a man missing for a couple of weeks. When Barnaby and Jones investigate they find a connection between the man and the editor of a "country life" magazine. The editor, Guy Sandy's, who writes scathing reviews, is about to torch a local hotel run by Matt Morecroft with his poison pen. On top of all this is the appearance of a mystery man who had an appointment to see Sandys. Bodies begin turning up, including that of Sandys, and there is no lack of red herrings. But what makes this episode stand out is the interaction between the characters. The episode features strong performances from Simon Williams as Sandys, Pooky Quesnel as his editor, Julia Benson, and Thomas Lockyer as the hotel's owner. Selina Cadell, who specializes in playing eccentric types, walks away with every scene she's in. And for once there is room for an entertaining sub-plot featuring Barnaby's wife, Joyce, who along with daughter Cully, were the most underused characters in the series. Of course, it wouldn't be Midsomer Murders without a weird murder, and here we get one using a clothes dryer to dispatch the victim. It all makes for a compellingly entertaining episode that remains intriguing until the end.
Midsomer Murders: The Sicilian Defence (2013)
Missed Opportunities
This was a passable episode that could and should have been much better.
Who's to blame? Some reviewers are happy to lay the blame on Neil Dudgeon, whose main crime is that he's not John Nettles.
Dudgeon, however, is just fine. In his episode the blame lies squarely with the writers. There are too many threads left dangling. For instance, the sub-plot of Edward Stannington's (Nicholas Rowe) death leaving everything to his Aunt Vivian (Cheryl Campbell) and her subsequent behavior is left dangling, as is her relationship with the dodgy Arthur Potts (John Henshaw). The crime here was the waste of talented actress Cheryl Campbell.
Also left dangling is the sub-plot of Arthur's wife Caroline (Fay Ridley) and her relationship with the missing Finn Robson (Royce Pierreson), who was set to elope with Harriet Farmer (Jo Woodcock) when they were attacked in the woods.
The mystery is pretty straightforward, with the viewer able to figure it out early.
Now compare this with the writing in the Season 4 episode, "Who Killed Cock Robin?", where three sub-plots were spun, with a host of red herrings to leave us guessing as to who the murderer was right up to the end.
Dudgeon has a lot to overcome here and he comes through just fine. Unlike some others, I have no problem with him assuming the role. Following the superb John Nettles is a daunting task, but Dudgeon handles it well. I like his take on the character of John Barnaby. Would the critics like it any better if he played it as a clone to the departed Tom Barnaby? His relationship with Sgt. Ben Jones unfolds naturally, given he is a total stranger who without warning replaces a boss who Jones greatly admired. So it's rather unsurprising that the two go through an adjustment period, given John Barnaby is a different personality and Jones is resentful that he was not chosen as Tom Barnaby's successor (which would have been an impossibility as he was not an inspector). Dudgeon's chemistry with Fiona Dolman, who plays wife Sarah, is excellent, and Sykes the dog steals every scene he's in. Shades of Asta.
No, Dudgeon's problem is in the poor quality of the writing, which is not nearly as crisp as in the earlier episodes with Nettles. This episode is but another example.
Timber Stampede (1939)
O'Brien, Wills and Reynolds Rise Above The Material
George O'Brien stars as Scott Baylor, a cattleman tending his herd in the rich timberlands. (This is certainly one on me. I thought cattlemen raised their herds on the prairie, not in the woods.) Con men Jay Jones (Poverty Row stalwart Guy Usher) and Foss Dunlap (Morgan Wallace) are plotting to strip the town of Wagon Wheel (Another great name!) of the timberland by promising to build a railroad, but in reality they're stripping the land of its trees. In tow with the baddies is reporter Anne Carr (Marjorie Reynolds), whom they duped into glorifying their efforts to "further the progress of the West." When Scott's Uncle Henry (Earl Dwire), who owns the town's newspaper, "The Wagon Wheel Clarion," (Must reading in Wagon Wheel.) publishes articles accusing the railroad of legalized larceny, Jones and Dunlap buy the paper out from under him and install Carr as Editor-In-Chief so she can write flattering articles about the progress the railroad is making. In addition, Jones and Dunlap take over the local saloon and hang a sign out front reading "Cowboys Not Welcome." It doesn't get any more obvious than that. Jones is also paying drifters and his loggers to claim additional acres of land under the Homestead Act and then sign their claims over to him. When the Sheriff Lyman (Bob Burns) investigates, Jones's hired gun Matt Chaflin (Robert Fiske) murders him and then is appointed sheriff by Jones. Anne, for her part, refuses to believe any of Scott's accusations, so he and sidekick Whopper Hatch (Chill Wills) pose as potential homesteaders and snap a photo of Jones paying the drifters. Showing the evidence to Anne, she joins them, and with the help of Uncle Henry, she publishes an edition of the Clarion with the photo and accompanying article exposing the fraud. Chaflin forms a posse to arrest Scott for the murder of Sheriff Lyman, and Scott holds them off at the newspaper office while Whopper rides for help among the other cattlemen. They arrive in time to save Scott's bacon, and Scott outduels Chaflin as well. The town and the forest are saved, and Jones and Dunlap are carted off to the hoosegow. But as Whopper notes, Scott is also going to serve a life sentence, but with Anne. While the plot has the usual holes one would expect in a B movie, the acting is uniformly good and Reynolds stands out as the most beautiful of O'Brien's leading ladies. It was only a matter of time until she would get her big breakthrough. Watch for Billy Benedict in a small role as the printing devil of Uncle Henry.
The Fighting Gringo (1939)
One of O'Brien's Best Efforts
Wade Barton (O'Brien) leads a band of troubleshooters whose duty is to help the oppressed and the innocent (natch). While foiling an attempted robbery of a stagecoach he makes the acquaintance of Nita Del Campo (Lupita Tovar). Naturally, she's taken with him and invites him to a fiesta at her father's hacienda. At the film moves on, both the audience and Wade learn that there's some work afoot to cheat Senor Del Campo (Lucio Villegas) out of his land. Behind the dirty deeds are John Courtney (LeRoy Mason) and his foreman, Ben Wallace (William Royle). During a heated private argument between Del Campo and Courtney, Wallace knocks out Del Campo and shoots Courtney to death, framing Del Campo. Wallace figures to cash in as he's engaged to Courtney's sister. Things look bleak for Del Campo, but Wade manages to save the day by turning Wallace and his dimwitted right-hand man, Rance Potter (Glenn Strange) against each other in order to get one to confess. Watch for Ben Johnson making his film debut in a small scene as a barfly at the cantina where Del Campos is hiding.
The Adventures of a Rookie (1943)
Best Viewed in the Wee Hours of the Morning
Wally Brown and Alan Carney, the poor man's Abbott and Costello, play a pair of bumbling GI's (What else?) who, after causing chaos in basic training, somehow get invited to a party where the cook comes down with scarlet fever, causing the entire household to be quarantined. When the funniest part of a comedy comes in the first twenty minutes with the fat guy (Carney) doing impressions of Robinson and Laughton, it's best to turn it off right there and then. A rich playboy type (right out of Abbott and Costello's Buck Privates) befriends the boys and later accompanies them on their misadventures. If you feel you must, the best time to watch this is at three in the morning with a bottle of whiskey at your side. That way, when you awaken the next morning you can convince yourself that it was all a dream brought on by too much booze.
Green Street Hooligans 2 (2009)
When Good Movies Spawn Bad Sequels
This one, I think, went straight to video. That would not surprise me, as this was a real stinker. It picks up where the original left off after the violent showdown between GSE and the Millwall fans. Dave Miller (Ross McCall) and two of his buddies are sent off to jail where they meet other jailed members of rival football firms who want to do them bloody harm. The damn thing looks like it was originally intended to be an American prison film, but was bought and adapted by a British firm. So what we end up with a sort of a bizarre cross between the soap Eastenders and HBO's prison drama Oz. Holes in the plot are quickly filled by unrelenting violence as Dave and the boys meet one disgruntled hooligan after another. Added to this mix are the tried and true roles of the Uncomprehending-but-Human Warden, the Honest Guard, and the Corrupt Guard. The Corrupt Guard develops a hatred for Dave and the boys, being as they have struck up a friendship with the Honest Guard, so she conspires with the Millwall thugs to stage a football match with the prize being release from jail. Of course she rigs it so Dave and the gang have almost no chance of winning, but the Honest Guard comes to the rescue and gets the match back on a level playing field so Dave and his boys win fair and square, and in the inevitable retribution of justice at the end, Corrupt Guard gets hers. Oh yeah, she's a woman in a men's prison. Oh, and in the role as the Corrupt Guard is none other than Marina Sirtis, late of Star Trek: The Next Generation. Now here is a warning to those of you that loved the show and correctly believed that Sirtis, as Counselor Troi, was Drop Dead Gorgeous: Do not watch this film. She has hit the wall and hit it hard. I could hardly believe at first that it was she. A friend of mine who works in Hollywood told me that Sirtis is a heavy smoker, so that accounts for a lot of the disparity. She also can't utter a sentence in the movie without using the F--- or C--- word. Usually in films such as these, the woman has a sex scene with one of the men. THANK GOD that didn't happen! I'd have tossed my cookies.
You'll Find Out (1940)
Only for the Diehards
Here's a film with a good premise – an heiress has been threatened and plans to spend the weekend hosting her 21st birthday at the family's gloomy old mansion. Among the suspicious cast of characters are Boris Karloff, Bela Lugosi, and Peter Lorre. That' s the good news. Now, here's the bad news. The star is Kay Kyser. Yes, Kay is asked by his business manager (Dennis O'Keefe) to supply the entertainment at said birthday party. Janis Bellacrest (Helen Parrish) is the business manager's fiancé. Karloff, Lorre and Lugosi are pretty much wasted as the villains, although, Thank Goodness, none of them serves as a "red herring." Good only for fans of the villainous trio and any hardcore Kay Kyser fans (if there are any). Kyser does five numbers in the movie, thus validating the need for a fast-forward button.
Amelia (2009)
Earhart Deserved Better
Well Hilary Swank does resemble Amelia Earhart, give her that much. But this biopic of the famed aviator plays more like a television movie of her life. Richard Gere is wasted as husband G. P. Putnam. Ewen McGregor makes for an excellent Gene Vidal, who was romantically involved with Earhart and whose life is worthy of a movie all its own, but here he's just another signpost on Amelia's road of life. Earhart led one of the most interesting lives of the 20th century, but one would never know it from this film, as it plays like a damp love story. There's seemingly no motivation; things just happen. Where the pallet calls for strong brush strokes, all we get is minimal airbrushing. For instance, considering all the speculation about her disappearance, I expected a lot more from this film. Considering I got nothing but a flat ending I was very disappointed. When you're sitting there waiting for Earhart to die so you can just get the movie over with, you know you're watching a bad movie. Overall, it's a featherweight approach to a heavyweight life.
White Cargo (1942)
That's HEDley!
I remember watching this as a youngster, when I was on my "movies or television shows in the jungle" kick (Tarzan, Jungle Jim, Ramar, and especially, Sheena). Watching it again, my attitude towards it had changed considerably, from awe-inspiring to camp. It's based on a 20's play from Broadway and was probably meant as a vehicle to get Hedy Lamarr over with the public as a sex siren. And that she is in White Cargo. While she certainly cannot act, the one thing she can do is vamp – and vamp she does. She is Tondelayo (no relation to Kimona Wannalaya), a dark beauty that tantalizes the Brits at an African rubber plantation and desires lots and lots of silk and baubles. Life on the plantation is monotonous and a hardship on those who serve. After all, there's no cable access, and drink is the best way out. Walter Pidgeon stars as Harry Witzel, plantation boss and the head of the local colonial district. His hated assistant, Wilbur Ashley, is worn down by the environment and is slightly bonkers. (Ashley is played by Bramwell Fletcher, best noted for laughing himself to death at Karloff's revival in The Mummy.) His replacement is Langford (Richard Carlson), full of spit and vinegar and oblivious to Witzel's warning of the "damp rot" that can grab hold of a man. One gets the feeling that the main cause of damp rot is the lack of women – or should I say, white women. Witzel tells Langford that he'll soon be indulging in "mammy palaver." Langford, of course, pooh-poohs Witzel's prophecies - until one night a figure appears at his door and says "I am Tondelayo." Yes, it's Hedy, looking quite hot in that bikini outfit, though she's slathered with about five pounds of dark make-up. (Sort of like the type Jennifer Jones wore as Pearl Chavez in another camp classic, Duel in the Sun.) Of course, in the play, Tondelayo is supposed to be African, which means Black, but this is Jim Crow America and the very idea, even the hint, of miscegenation, was deemed repugnant for the masses. So, MGM got the play's author in to change Tondelayo around to being "half-Egyptian, half-Arab," and not her blue eyes on close-ups. In fact, her eyes get longer close-ups than Lugosi's in White Zombie. To make a long story short, Tondelayo is in love with Harry, who ignores her. So she sets her sights on Langford, who marries her. Big mistake, for Langford can't afford her and Tondelayo has a low boredom point. (Tondelayo also speaks like many young athletes in that she constantly refers to herself in the third person. This would be funny if it weren't so pitiful.) Because the other characters pound into her head the inviolability of marriage ("till death do you part"), she takes to poisoning her husband with "Jama juice." Harry catches on and forces her to drink the juice: End of Tondelayo. Campier entertainment one couldn't ask for.
Tales of Manhattan (1942)
Standout Cast Makes It A Classic
TALES OF MANHATTAN (20th C. Fox, 1942): The name of this film could very well be "Tails of Manhattan," as it is a series of episodes linked together by a custom-made tailcoat and the fortune, or lack of, it brings to those who wear it. The first episode concerns a love triangle between Charles Boyer (the coat's first owner), Rita Hayworth, and the ever-dependable Thomas Mitchell. The coat then moves to another owner, Cesar Romero, and his pal, the shy Henry Fonda. Cesar palms off the tails on Henry Fonda who is to be best man at his wedding to Ginger Rogers. He put a love letter from another woman in the pocket and Rogers finds it. Romero has Fonda claim the cutaway – and the contents – were his. It works only too well, as Rogers dumps Romero for Fonda.
The coat is then sold to a thrift shop and purchased by Elsa Lanchester for her husband, Charles Laughton, a poor musician making ends meet playing piano in a sleazy restaurant. He gets to see his dream come true by conducting the symphony he has written, but the coat dooms him when it begins to fall apart at the seams. Laughton recovers with the help of the symphony master and takes off the coat to continue his concert. At this point I have quite a few tears in my eyes. Only Laughton can get away with this. The men in the audience then show their solidarity by taking off their coats.
The coat next comes into the possession of down-and-out disbarred lawyer Edward G. Robinson. James Gleason, the pastor at the mission, gives it to Eddie G. so he can attend his college reunion. While there he runs into snobbish, antagonistic classmate George Sanders, who knows the truth about Eddie G. and makes use of another classmate's loss of money to embarrass Robinson. The scene of Robinson keeping his dignity throughout the scene as he comes clean is nothing short of remarkable acting and Sanders is wonderful as his straight man. Eddie G. returns to the mission and all looks lost, but three of his classmates arrive and offer him a job on Wall Street. Again, more tears in my eyes. Eddie's reaction out of the sight on the stairs is precious. Pastor Gleason has the coat taken across the street to the Santelli Bros. used clothing store to resale. Gleason is also terrific as the pastor of the mission.
The coat's next owner is W.C. Fields, playing his usual conman role. Phil Silvers does a nice turn as the seller of the coat and Fields is engaged by Margaret Dumont to speak on the evils of alcohol to Dumont's high society friends. What he doesn't know is that the coconut milk being served at the lecture has been liberally spiked by Dumont's son in revenge for here cutting off his nightlife. This marks the last appearance by Fields on film. To watch Fields delivering his lecture is truly to see a comic master at work.
The coat is then taken in a burglary by J. Carroll Naish. He uses it to rob a Park Avenue social gathering. During his escape in an airplane the coat catches fire and he ends up throwing it overboard, where it lands in the field of poor farmers Paul Robeson and Ethel Waters on Christmas Eve. They bring the coat and the cash to their pastor, played by Eddie Anderson. The pastor disburses the cash to the entire community so no one goes without on Christmas.
Charles Beaumont later adapted this theme for an episode of The Twilight Zone entitled "Dead Man's Shoes."
The only glitch in the film is Boyer's heavy French accent, which reminded me so much of Pepe Le Pew that I cracked up just listening.
Bloody Mama (1970)
Typical Corman Cheese
Roger Corman's take on Ma Barker, with Shelley Winters hitting rock bottom as Ma. Corman mentions in the credits that any similarity between anyone living or dead is purely coincidental, except for the Barker family. Well, we can include them in with the rest, because other than naming the characters after Ma and her sons, there is no similarity. It's just good, cheesy fun. Going for a psychological turn, the movie seems to revolve around sex, except for parts where Corman inserts his social commentary on America, which is always a hoot. It was made during the period where Corman, applauded by the French, was believing his own reviews and imagining himself not as a B director, but as an important social commentator. Anyone who sat through Gas-s-s-s knows the depth of Corman's thinking. Robert DeNiro has one of his early parts, playing one of Ma's sons. I can just imagine method actor DeNiro asking Corman what his motivation is. Oh to be a fly on that wall. Not to be outdone, Shelley also mumbles quite a few of her lines, perhaps competing with DeNiro. Bruce Dern is also in there, as son Arthur's (Clint Kimbrough) sadistic prison friend who joins the gang. Don Stroud plays oldest son Herman. Lots of nude scenes, though I kept wishing that Shelley would keep her clothes on. Thankfully, she did. It's fun to watch, but Corman did this sort of nonsense better in Big Bad Mama.
The Shanghai Gesture (1941)
Unintentionally Campy Von Sternberg
If what is meant by the Shanghai Gesture is giving the middle finger to the audience, then this Von Sternberg film hits the target. This is a pathetic piece of celluloid that at times threatens to disintegrate into a complete laugh riot. Get this – Poppy (Gene Tierney) is out for a night's fun in Shanghai when she stumbles into the sin emporium of Mother Gin Sling (Originally Mother Godamm in the play). Mother, played so over the top by Ona Munson (yet another Asian with blue eyes) is taking a role Von Sternberg would have given to Anna May Wong in the 30s (she would ave done far better), with a variation of Poppy being played by Marlene Dietrich. The casino, with its Art Deco decor, is more suited to Los Angeles than Shanghai. Best of all is the awaited entrance of Mother Gin Sling. Though Von Sternberg clearly wants it to be show stopping, all it does is remind us of when the curtain went up on King Kong in New York. And with a hairdo and dress that looks like her stylist was Cher. Meanwhile,Poppy has fallen under the spell of Doctor Omar (Victor Mature). If you want a real belly laugh, check out Mature in this role. Peter Lorre as Doctor Omar, okay, but Victor Mature? At any rate, Omar leads Poppy into an ever-spiraling addiction to gambling and drugs. And he works fast, considering that the movie is only 98 minutes long. Now enter Sir Guy Charteris (Walter Huston), in a role clearly evoking Sydney Greenstreet. Seems Sir Guy has bought a large slice of Shanghai, including the ground on which Mother has her den of inequity, so Mother has to vamoose from the premises by the coming Chinese New Year. (Von Sternberg's great for this sort of plotting.) Not so fast, however, for Mother Gin Sling suddenly remembers that she was once married to Sir Guy and that he abandoned her while taking her family's fortune. Amazingly, Sir Guy does not recognize her; guess all Chinese look the same to him. Mother plans her revenge by inviting Sir Guy to a Chinese New Year's party he'll never forget. At the party, Sir Guy turns the tables by revealing to Mother that, indeed, she is a mother: Poppy is their daughter! How Gin Sling couldn't accurately remember giving birth is just one of those things the audience has to overlook. Well, Mother's just not the mothering type, if you know what I mean, so we can all guess what happens to dear Poppy. By the way, also check out the hat Mother wears throughout the film. She looks like something out of a broken down carnival.