Review of Stargate

Stargate (1994)
2/10
Someone pass me a gatling gun...
14 May 2001
This was the only movie I had seen in a cinema that was so bad that I almost walked out. The story is ridiculous and completely devoid of atmosphere and the main villain is about as frightening as a hairdresser. The initial premise was weak (why didn't they just keep turning the wheel until it worked?) and the ending was predictable. But the major problem was the trip between the start and the end was so dull.

And why, whenever marines appear in a movie, is there always one called Kowalski??

On the plus side, the graphics are very good. The flushing-down-the-U-bend travel scenes are effective, and the watery toilet bowl that they climb into is effective. Also I love the guards helmets that fold up very nicely indeed.

I haven't read the other comments yet, but I suspect there will be a lot of positive ones because the special effects are quite good. But please, trust me on this, IT'S A BAD FILM. If you are going down to the video store, consider reaching for something else like Independence Day (made by the same people, full of flaws, but a roller coaster ride and lots of fun), Contact (similar space travel scenes to Stargate, but much more intelligently carried out) or even The Mummy, which is about as inaccurate on Ancient Egypt (why do they have pyramids in Thebes...???) but it has more laughs and action on the way.
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