can't this director get a life, let alone a job? God! He's so bad! I feel bad for the screenwriter, John Logan (Gladiator, Any Given Sunday) who seemed to have a frightening idea in his head and, low and behold, Louis Morneau, acclaimed director of Carnosaur 2 and Soldier Boyz (which sounds like a band), says, "me first!". I can see this loser smiling as he directs this movie, thinking, "ah what sheer brilliance!" (if he's capable of that big a word) as he watches the most suspenseful scene of the movie, the credits. And then for his way to handle the actors. Spare me the horror. Dina Meyer needs a job, a friend, or a psychologist because she's pathetic. Lou Diamond Phillips better go start playing drug thieves again in a Steven Seagal movie if he wants to stay alive. Oh and how about the police rookie who looks like John Rocker? Hmm, he was fantastic! NOT! Kudos to the special effects for their mastery of cardboard and 8 feet wide pixels that try and compose bats, which more look like globs of mud. And the sound effects. Haven't heard that much shrieking from flying creatures since Cher came out with a new album. And the editors. Some guy wrote way up above me that the editing was good. Let's analyze the editorial brilliance. In the second scene, Meyer and Leon, some creepy dude, are examining harmless bats. A helicopter sneakily comes up on them and makes them jump (DEN DUN!) which adds to the sheer horror of the scene. You see them argue and moan before they get into the helicopter, and in the next scene they're leaving in a plane. What is this? The helicopter have Firestone tires or something? The cinematography is more erratic than Kaminski's brilliant "Saving Private Ryan", or something through the eyes of Ray Charles. Oh one more thing before I leave. Some extra gets killed when he's riding a bike, humming to himself. Does he notice the swarms of cardboard mudglobs flying above him, hitting everyone, and hear the splatter of their corn syrup blood against the windows. No! Because LOUIS MORNEAU IS TOO DUMB TO NOTICE! AIIIIIIHHH!
Review of Bats
