Ahhh...Sandy Frank. Who are you, and why do you continue to torment us with truly horrible Japanese movies? If not for you, these stinkers would never have seen the light of day in America. I'm sure the Japanese themselves writhe in agony every time they see one of these poorly dubbed cinematic abominations scrolling across an American t.v. screen.
Fugitive Alien is only one of the many quality films imported by the wretched Sandy Frank. It is a series of episodes of a Japanese t.v. show strung together to make an incomprehensible 'movie', a la Riding With Death. That is like taking Gilligan's Island, chopping it up so that it makes no sense whatsoever(that wouldn't take much) slapping some REALLY poor dubbing on it, and sending it over to foreign countries as representations of American culture. While this might, indeed, show a true sense of what American culture is really like(confusing, badly costumed, incoherent, and stupid)would we really want the whole rest of the world to see that?
Fugitive Alien tells(badly)the story of the ubiquitous 'Ken', a Valna wolf raider from Valnastar. On his planet, these ferocious warriors trick themselves out in more white face paint than Liza, stupid Rainbow Bright jumpsuits, and helmets that for some reason have curly blonde wigs attached. My theory is that they got laughed at so often for this look that they started killing people out of sheer annoyance. They attack the Earth(or Japan, anyway) and lay waste to Tokyo. Our 'hero' Ken kills his friend and fellow raider when he tries to kill a little boy named...you got, Ken. Apparently the entire universe is peopled with guys names Ken. Go figure. Is there a whole planet full of Barbies out there, too?
Now considered a traitor to his people(he refused to wear the splendidly awful outfit anymore) he hooks up with the human crew of the Baccheus 3, 'the Earth's oldest spaceship'. They set out to help another planet in distress, where the Japanese people wander about in shiny Arab headgear, and the world leader resembles Ghenghis Khan if he'd been a cross dresser. Ken leaves the ship against orders so that he can skip and prance across the landscape, and gets arrested for some reason(probably his red and white Power Rangers jumpsuit offended the locals). Captain Joe, who resembles a squirrel and looks like he's hiding nuts in his cheeks, decides to break Ken out so that he can help the alien band leader in his cell escape. A stupid escape attempt then follows, heavy on the blinking Christmas lights and idiots in bad costumes shooting at our hero with plastic toy guns.
Ken is injured, and is helped by his former girlfriend Rita(these are alien people, right? Do the Japanese consider Americans 'alien'? Well, I suppose that wouldn't be really surprising if they did) a girl in a long blonde wig. She's hunted him down to kill him because the guy he killed was her brother, and the law of their planet says that she has to kill him personally as next of kin to the victim. But of course she can't put us out of our viewing misery by just carrying out her orders like a good little girl. No, she dies and Ken continues to breathe. He and Sargeant Pepper get back to the ship and take off, and Ken moons over a pendant that belonged to the dead girl. And that's when a scroll comes up on the screen that says: To Be Continued. Aggghhh! Will the pain never cease?
Fugitive Alien is only one of the many quality films imported by the wretched Sandy Frank. It is a series of episodes of a Japanese t.v. show strung together to make an incomprehensible 'movie', a la Riding With Death. That is like taking Gilligan's Island, chopping it up so that it makes no sense whatsoever(that wouldn't take much) slapping some REALLY poor dubbing on it, and sending it over to foreign countries as representations of American culture. While this might, indeed, show a true sense of what American culture is really like(confusing, badly costumed, incoherent, and stupid)would we really want the whole rest of the world to see that?
Fugitive Alien tells(badly)the story of the ubiquitous 'Ken', a Valna wolf raider from Valnastar. On his planet, these ferocious warriors trick themselves out in more white face paint than Liza, stupid Rainbow Bright jumpsuits, and helmets that for some reason have curly blonde wigs attached. My theory is that they got laughed at so often for this look that they started killing people out of sheer annoyance. They attack the Earth(or Japan, anyway) and lay waste to Tokyo. Our 'hero' Ken kills his friend and fellow raider when he tries to kill a little boy named...you got, Ken. Apparently the entire universe is peopled with guys names Ken. Go figure. Is there a whole planet full of Barbies out there, too?
Now considered a traitor to his people(he refused to wear the splendidly awful outfit anymore) he hooks up with the human crew of the Baccheus 3, 'the Earth's oldest spaceship'. They set out to help another planet in distress, where the Japanese people wander about in shiny Arab headgear, and the world leader resembles Ghenghis Khan if he'd been a cross dresser. Ken leaves the ship against orders so that he can skip and prance across the landscape, and gets arrested for some reason(probably his red and white Power Rangers jumpsuit offended the locals). Captain Joe, who resembles a squirrel and looks like he's hiding nuts in his cheeks, decides to break Ken out so that he can help the alien band leader in his cell escape. A stupid escape attempt then follows, heavy on the blinking Christmas lights and idiots in bad costumes shooting at our hero with plastic toy guns.
Ken is injured, and is helped by his former girlfriend Rita(these are alien people, right? Do the Japanese consider Americans 'alien'? Well, I suppose that wouldn't be really surprising if they did) a girl in a long blonde wig. She's hunted him down to kill him because the guy he killed was her brother, and the law of their planet says that she has to kill him personally as next of kin to the victim. But of course she can't put us out of our viewing misery by just carrying out her orders like a good little girl. No, she dies and Ken continues to breathe. He and Sargeant Pepper get back to the ship and take off, and Ken moons over a pendant that belonged to the dead girl. And that's when a scroll comes up on the screen that says: To Be Continued. Aggghhh! Will the pain never cease?