4/10
Horrifyingly bad
2 April 2005
From what I hear The Amityville Horror seems like the definition of a marmite film. Opinion is neatly divided into those that love it and those that hate it. I side with the latter.

Its about a haunting but at the same time isn't really about anything at all. There is no structure, no real beginning middle and end - no POINT to it basically. Its boils down to a series of set pieces which are meant to be scary. Maybe the film is so subdued because its supposedly based on true events. I say supposedly because its obvious to anyone who has read into it that it was an obvious hoax. If the Lutz's story had any more holes in it you could use it as a soup strainer. And if you are in the habit of making stuff up then at least go whole hog and make something remotely scary. Beardy men chopping wood and evil pigs (yes pig) are not scary. Neither is someone tampering with your front door. That just makes you want to install a burglar alarm not consult your bible.

However the most annoying thing about it is that it had such great potential. That was one seriously creepy house. The shot of it standing there in the dark with those quarter moon shaped windows looking like eyes alone demanded a better film. Thankfully this years remake sounds like it is a far better film and does the haunted house justice.

Don't even get me started on that sequel with the lamp stand....
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