My purpose for watching this wasn't for the lesbian content (I'm sure I could find steamier stuff if I tried) - it was to see the depths to which such a fantastic actor as Dennis Price, the star of "Kind Hearts and Coronets" about 22 years earlier, was forced to sink to in order to pay his bills. It truly is a depressing experience, though, remarkably, Price manages to escape with most of his dignity intact. This seems an even greater achievement when you consider that the DVD is of a Spanish film dubbed into German with English subtitles.
In "Vampyros Lesbos" he plays a Dr. Steward, psychologist and secret vampire enthusiast, the latter hobby suddenly being revealed out of nowhere once the plot requires it. You see, despite being given a rather ill-defined character to work with, and in direct contrast to the rest of the cast, Price actually *acts*. Mixing concern with frightened fascination, he draws your attention in whatever scene he appears, and probably gets more close ups in this film than in any other I've seen. It's not a particularly large part but he does have a fair amount of screen time, and it was a joy to watch him. It was a huge shame that I couldn't actually hear him speak his own lines, as the German dubber made the best attempt to deaden any emotion that Price attempted to convey, but his facial expressions were enough, and so I just imagined Price's voice instead. Whilst the direction elsewhere in the film can be called into question, Price manages to create a great atmosphere of tension in his encounter with Countess Nadine, pleading with her to give him the secret of vampirism. The only real slip-up is in his death a few seconds later in which, upon realising that his life is distinctly on the line, gently canters down some stairs rather than make a bolt for it, allowing Nadine's burly henchman to effortlessly catch up with and throttle the life out of him, though I suspect this is more a directing fault than anything that could be blamed on Price himself. And it must be said that the strangling is rather unnerving.
However, after Price dies we still have fifteen minutes left until the end of the film, which we must spend with the other characters that we've been presented with throughout the duration, and this is where the film falls down - every scene lacking Dennis Price is absolutely dire, as he is the only actor capable of giving a decent performance, and the story holding everything together is so flimsy that it might as well not be there. And indeed isn't, for a majority of the time. Price's Dr. Steward is actually in one of the many seemingly pointless subplots peppered here and there, which also include a scary pervo bloke who gets his kicks him tying up women and threatening them with a hacksaw, and an insane woman throwing herself about a clinic waiting for Countess Nadine to return to her and give her a bit of a seeing to. These characters serve no function at all, and are rather tedious, all told.
The main plot line concerns itself with Linda, who is apparently worried about the frequency of erotic dreams she's been having about a woman she's never met before. When her boyfriend, a shifty looking spiv type, takes her to a strip-club (?!) she recognises the "dancer" (that's being charitable) as the woman in her dreams. Turns out the woman is Countess Nadine Carody, a vampire with connections to Dracula himself. Linda goes to Nadine's estate to help her with insurance, or something, and has various encounters with her during the running time. Narrative consistency is thrown out of the window when, despite being frightened of Nadine when they first meet, she quite happily goes skinny-dipping with her (?!) and then lies nude with her on the beach - "It's good to lie naked in the sand. Especially when you're with somebody." "Yes." Good grief. And in the next scene she's once more a bit suspect about the whole deal.
I know what you're thinking - "It's lesbo porn, it doesn't need a plot!" But there isn't really much of the steamy shenanigans going on to uphold such a claim, and the few scenes of "Near naked ladies snatch a few fumbling kisses," are played so stiltedly that any erotic tension is immediately dissipated. The director seems to think that propping a few nude women here and there automatically means "sexy" when it, well, doesn't. It just gets tedious and laughable more than anything else. It comes to something when I was far more willing to watch Dennis Price writing in his diary than two rather beautiful ladies having it away with each other.
The direction is full of "clever" and "artistic" shots of scorpions and moths and a kite (...), which are meant to make us nod our heads sagely and say "Ahh, mmm..." but just come off as pretentious and silly. We're also forced to endure a bizarre striptease performance (in which Nadine removes her clothes and puts them on her partner, who seems to be pretending to be a mannequin) twice, and both times it's dull as hell. Fortunately the group of 40-somethings in the club appear to be enjoying themselves, though since they staggeringly fail to notice Nadine killing her partner on the second run through and clap anyway, I'm not so certain that their opinion is valid.
Apparently this is a cult classic, with its dire soundtrack (the sitar has never been my favourite instrument) achieving acclaim in some quarters. Allegedly. I can't say that I was disappointed with this film as I knew it was going to be rubbish to start with. Fortunately it was vaguely worthwhile simply to see Price's performance, though it's certainly a disc that won't be given another spin in quite a long time.
In "Vampyros Lesbos" he plays a Dr. Steward, psychologist and secret vampire enthusiast, the latter hobby suddenly being revealed out of nowhere once the plot requires it. You see, despite being given a rather ill-defined character to work with, and in direct contrast to the rest of the cast, Price actually *acts*. Mixing concern with frightened fascination, he draws your attention in whatever scene he appears, and probably gets more close ups in this film than in any other I've seen. It's not a particularly large part but he does have a fair amount of screen time, and it was a joy to watch him. It was a huge shame that I couldn't actually hear him speak his own lines, as the German dubber made the best attempt to deaden any emotion that Price attempted to convey, but his facial expressions were enough, and so I just imagined Price's voice instead. Whilst the direction elsewhere in the film can be called into question, Price manages to create a great atmosphere of tension in his encounter with Countess Nadine, pleading with her to give him the secret of vampirism. The only real slip-up is in his death a few seconds later in which, upon realising that his life is distinctly on the line, gently canters down some stairs rather than make a bolt for it, allowing Nadine's burly henchman to effortlessly catch up with and throttle the life out of him, though I suspect this is more a directing fault than anything that could be blamed on Price himself. And it must be said that the strangling is rather unnerving.
However, after Price dies we still have fifteen minutes left until the end of the film, which we must spend with the other characters that we've been presented with throughout the duration, and this is where the film falls down - every scene lacking Dennis Price is absolutely dire, as he is the only actor capable of giving a decent performance, and the story holding everything together is so flimsy that it might as well not be there. And indeed isn't, for a majority of the time. Price's Dr. Steward is actually in one of the many seemingly pointless subplots peppered here and there, which also include a scary pervo bloke who gets his kicks him tying up women and threatening them with a hacksaw, and an insane woman throwing herself about a clinic waiting for Countess Nadine to return to her and give her a bit of a seeing to. These characters serve no function at all, and are rather tedious, all told.
The main plot line concerns itself with Linda, who is apparently worried about the frequency of erotic dreams she's been having about a woman she's never met before. When her boyfriend, a shifty looking spiv type, takes her to a strip-club (?!) she recognises the "dancer" (that's being charitable) as the woman in her dreams. Turns out the woman is Countess Nadine Carody, a vampire with connections to Dracula himself. Linda goes to Nadine's estate to help her with insurance, or something, and has various encounters with her during the running time. Narrative consistency is thrown out of the window when, despite being frightened of Nadine when they first meet, she quite happily goes skinny-dipping with her (?!) and then lies nude with her on the beach - "It's good to lie naked in the sand. Especially when you're with somebody." "Yes." Good grief. And in the next scene she's once more a bit suspect about the whole deal.
I know what you're thinking - "It's lesbo porn, it doesn't need a plot!" But there isn't really much of the steamy shenanigans going on to uphold such a claim, and the few scenes of "Near naked ladies snatch a few fumbling kisses," are played so stiltedly that any erotic tension is immediately dissipated. The director seems to think that propping a few nude women here and there automatically means "sexy" when it, well, doesn't. It just gets tedious and laughable more than anything else. It comes to something when I was far more willing to watch Dennis Price writing in his diary than two rather beautiful ladies having it away with each other.
The direction is full of "clever" and "artistic" shots of scorpions and moths and a kite (...), which are meant to make us nod our heads sagely and say "Ahh, mmm..." but just come off as pretentious and silly. We're also forced to endure a bizarre striptease performance (in which Nadine removes her clothes and puts them on her partner, who seems to be pretending to be a mannequin) twice, and both times it's dull as hell. Fortunately the group of 40-somethings in the club appear to be enjoying themselves, though since they staggeringly fail to notice Nadine killing her partner on the second run through and clap anyway, I'm not so certain that their opinion is valid.
Apparently this is a cult classic, with its dire soundtrack (the sitar has never been my favourite instrument) achieving acclaim in some quarters. Allegedly. I can't say that I was disappointed with this film as I knew it was going to be rubbish to start with. Fortunately it was vaguely worthwhile simply to see Price's performance, though it's certainly a disc that won't be given another spin in quite a long time.