Real Men (1987)
1/10
Terrible, terrible movie
24 February 2006
I think the only reason this hasn't made it onto the "worst 100" list is because no one's ever heard of it. Or perhaps former viewers brains, in a desperate attempt to save themselves from febrile nightmares for years, simply erased it from their memories. No, really; a couple of weeks after seeing this piece of schlock my friend and I saw a poster for it in a video store and he couldn't even remember it.

I can't even figure out where to start describing how bad this movie is. It seemed to start off OK, but within maybe 2 or 3 minutes it just fell completely flat. It tries to be funny through absurdity, which can work out just fine if you do it well, but in this case it was just unbelievably lame. The story simply wasn't funny, it was just dumb. They tried to add some "direct humor" with jokes and setups, but they were even dumber. So we end up with a continual stream of horribly telegraphed "jokes", none of which were funny even if we didn't see them coming. And to add to the insult, the delivery and timing was all over the place.

I have to agree with the other reviewer in that Ritter can be under-appreciated, but even though he actually seemed to be trying (unlike Belushi, who couldn't be bothered), nothing could possibly save this movie. It's simply so stupid that I couldn't help feeling the joke was on me, that some jaded burned-out exec in Hollywood was laughing at MY stupidity for thinking that a movie with two "stars" couldn't be THAT bad. Maybe he's still laughing today, judging by the continual stream of garbage that's come out over the last couple of years.

Really, don't see this movie, it's not even good as camp.
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