Review of Uninvited

Uninvited (1988 Video)
2/10
Well, look what the cat dragged aboard!
14 May 2008
As far as unhinged, over-the-top, implausible and utterly farcical 80's horror movie plot formulas go, "Uninvited" most definitely takes the cake! The idea of a mutating cat barfing up a killer creature resembling a hybrid between a bat and a bowl of rotting placenta is already quite crackpot, but even more inconceivable is how literally everything in this film happens so impulsively and indifferent, like they are the most common events to occur in life! A cute and fluffy ginger pussycat with a monstrous mutant inside of its body escapes from a science lab (why would anyone do such an experiment in the first place?) and aimlessly wanders around a touristy beach community. Nearby a trio of ageing frauds prepare a clean getaway on their yacht, still one of them insists on picking up two young and empty-headed girls in bikini first. Supposedly to keep a low profile. Yeah … right! The girls then invite three random guys they *just* met on the pier and even bring the deadly putty-cat aboard. We're supposed to believe all this because … life is really that easy? Anyhow, subsequently nothing happens for quite a while until - thank God - the cat pukes out its monstrous insides and the characters die in order of annoyance. The rating and reviews don't lie: "Uninvited" truly is a horrible and hilarious (for all the wrong reasons) B-movie. The narrative structure is wildly uneven. Sometimes nothing happens for twenty minutes straight and then suddenly three or four people die in less than two minutes. The make-up effects are far beyond cheesy and inept, with 'scary' hand-puppets that wouldn't even upset a two-year-old child and supposedly virulent cat attacks that are actually rather tame. The dialogs and performances are so tacky you'll feel the desire to rip off your own ears and feed 'em to the cat. If you think you've endured everything then, just wait until you witness the finale, which is without exaggerating the most moronic ending I've ever seen in my life. "Uninvited" stars veteran horror actor George Kennedy ("Death Ship", "Virus", "The Terror Within") but – exactly like the character he depicts – he wonders what the hell he's doing in yet another lousy horror movie and once again surrounded by an ensemble cast of untalented nobodies. Poor, poor George… There definitely is some fun to be had with "Uninvited", but only if you leave your brains at the door and replace the inside of your skull with gallons and gallons of beer.
10 out of 16 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink

Recently Viewed