7/10
Rabid Grannies (1989): Uncut Version
2 May 2009
Warning: Spoilers
Ah... what a wonderful and wacky world, Troma. Its' own veritable Disney-Land of the perverse, strange, wild, offensive, tasteless, unique, and often brilliant. Where few other films have dared to go. What many filmmakers only dream or fantasize doing... Troma is one of the world's leading, and only still truly, independent sources of films. Their reputation made with the shockingly cheap and shockingly bad; 1976's Blood Sucking Freaks, 1984's The Toxic Avenger, and 1997's Tromeo & Juliet - among others. One could say they sought to bring the same attitude of much of the films considered "video nasties" in the U.K. to America, putting some of the most grotesque and shocking things ever seen onto movie screens. They acquired a cult following, and with the success of Avenger and its' sequels, 1985's Class of Nuke 'Em High, and 1990's Sgt. Kabukiman NYPD, began distributing somewhat more respectable films from clearly more ambitious directors. Including 1983's Monster in the Closet (the greatest horror parody I've ever seen), 1990's daring and smart Def by Temptation, and this little Belgian import, Rabid Grannies.

Grannies is a darkly absurd and ingeniously subversive splatter film about two kindly old aunts and their horrible family of shameless, opportunistic ne'er-do-wells involved in all sorts of underhanded doings. When the aunts host a dual Birthday party, the cousins swarm in from all around to put on an act of smirking, fingers-crossed behind-their-back sincerity, each hoping to con the wealthy women into leaving them a chunk of their vast estate and fortune. Meanwhile, the aunts' house staff know all about the double timing and dirty tricks but keep their mouths shut because the women are so close to senility, they probably wouldn't believe them. And so begins the decadent dinner party, where the cousins stab each other in the back and try to raise doubt in another's reputation with the aunts, hoping to make themselves look better by comparison. Until the aunts receive a mysterious surprise gift with a letter from a disinherited cousin who decides not to attend the Birthday party, wishing them all the best. However, when the old ladies open it, they become possessed by evil spirits and mutate into cannibalistic, demonic zombies, hungry for human flesh. And they're not above feasting on their deviously immoral loved ones.

What makes Grannies so brilliant is how well thought-out and smart it is. Yes, the cousins are all despicable, loathsome things. But, when the gore starts to fly, and the death scenes become increasingly mean-spirited and frighteningly intense (the film's one legitimate flaw), you start to see the humanity in them. Even the worst of people have their human side, all evil has an understandable motivation. By that virtue, the sweet old aunt characters are not entirely clean themselves. They are judgmental - especially to the lesbian cousin and her girlfriend, patronizing to their loyal butler Radu (a smarter version of Manuel from Fawlty Towers), and religiously elitist. But they're also kind and charitable (as we see, they help out a homeless beggar in the street), you have to feel bad for them. A little. And finally, when the aunts become possessed, they are suddenly filled with a sense of perception they were missing before. They now see right through all the smiling, lying faces of their nasty relatives, and are not exactly forgiving of all their bad deeds and deception.

Most important to mention is a scene where the demons confront one of their cousins, a priest who hates kids. The first hands him a machine gun and suggests (in a more overt fashion than, but still in the mood of, Agatha Christie's And Then There Were None) that he kill himself to spare him the agony of being viciously ripped apart. The second tells him not to trust the first because, if the priest kills himself, he will go to hell; suggesting- is an eternity of suffering in the afterlife worth sparing him a few minutes of agony in his current life? They continue bouncing pros and cons off each other, playing a game with him, basically betting over what his choice will be. It's a razor-sharp and clever scene that highlights the film's devilish intelligence and witty subversiveness. Of course, it also goes a little too far as times. Never moreso than when a certain cousin on the plump side has his leg carved open and slowly stabbed, licked, chewed, and devoured by the putrid, alien-like demons. Maybe leaving a little to our imaginations is a good thing.

The film deftly marries elements from 1982's Creepshow, 1987's Dolls, 1985's Demons, and 1981's The Evil Dead, including- the greedy family salivating over an old relative's fortune, being trapped in huge old creepy castle-like mansion, demonic possession from the essence of a somewhat ancient object, and of course, the sadistic murderous zombies with sharp teeth and claw-like fingers. Rabid Grannies would also go on to inspire other rabid grannies in Peter Jackson's 1992 cult classic, Dead Alive (aka- Braindead), and Luca (Ghoulies) Bercovici's grimy little 1995 cheapie, The Granny, whose gore was not nearly as savaged as Rabid Grannies'. Grannies has had an unfortunate DVD history in the eyes of gorehounds. Troma has never cut the film back to its' original uncensored European version. So the film's plentiful, impressive gore effects can only be seen in a montage on Troma's DVD in the special features section- which is also missing at least one key gore sequence.
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