4/10
Were they TRYING to make an awful movie?
7 July 2009
Warning: Spoilers
I don't even know where to begin listing everything that's wrong with this movie. I guess I should start with the fact that Kristen Kreuk is starring in a movie about a martial artist (although wu shu is more of a performance art than a martial art – but that's another story) despite the fact she is utterly incapable of moving gracefully. However, she can't take all of the blame for the poor fighting as the choreography was atrocious (people getting knocked out by being kicked in the leg?) and the multiple interrogations were intrinsically stupid (Chun Li asks question, bad guy resists, Chun Li punches bad guy and bends his arm funny, bad guys tells her everything – all in the course of ten seconds.) But when you put her together with Chris Klein, it creates a void of acting ability that would have made it impossible to buy into the plot if the plot were actually plausible. The only decent performances in the entire movie were by Neil McDonough as Bison and, surprisingly, Moon Bloodgood as a detective – but that's made moot by the fact that the writer has apparently never heard actual humans converse before, so the dialogue wouldn't be worth listening to even if it were delivered well. Plus, Bison's evil plan is to . . . build quality housing and sell it to the rich? He became head of an evil empire for that? Also, he wipes out other crime families to be able to do it and is doing it because he wants a better life for his daughter – if they hadn't repeatedly called him the head of a criminal organization, I might've thought he was just a decent hardworking businessman/superhero.

It seems the entire movie was just filler until they could put the inevitable final confrontation on screen. And when she threw a fireball in that final confrontation, it was probably the worst special effect ever seen in a big-budget movie. The only way I could imagine anyone enjoying this movie is if they appreciate watching has-been actors ham-fist their way through a script that was written by someone with almost no knowledge of Street Fighter over the course of one booze-filled weekend.
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