Stan Helsing: A Parody (R, 1:30) — Other: Comedy, bargain basement, formula
2 background facts:
(1) In Bram Stoker's classic novel Dracula, the intrepid Dutch adventurer who was the vampire count's nemesis was Abraham Van Helsing. ("Bram", incidentally, is a diminutive of "Abraham".)
(2) By vote of knowledgeable fans at the 2003 World Science Fiction Convention, the 3rd best SF film of the 20th Century was Forbidden Planet. It was released in 1956. It starred Leslie Nielsen as the heroic spaceship captain.
I have listed this film as a comedy, since that's what it purports to be. Certainly it's full of formulaic horror-movie stereotypes, which you would expect from a self-proclaimed parody. And I laffed out loud a couple of times, which means it can't sink to the absolute rock bottom of my ratingometer. That's about it for the singing of praises, tho.
The protagonist is the slacker video clerk Stan Helsing (family name simply Helsing, not Van Helsing), who keeps getting mistaken for his ancestor by people who are particularly well informed on this issue while otherwise showing a remarkable tendency to drown while gazing upward open-mouthed during a rainstorm.
Stan (Steve Howey) and 3 friends set out for a Halloween party. One of the group, Nadine (Diora Baird) is Stan's ex-girlfriend, she's pretty emphatic about the "ex" part, and we see in flashback why she feels that way, as Stan is one of the most insensitive lunkheads on the planet. This raises the question "Why the hell is Nadine going to a party with this schmuck?"
No attempt is made to answer that or explain the many other improbabilities. The viewer is left to infer that the various horror-movie creatures wandering around wreaking havoc are going unnoticed because everyone else thinks they're just costumed for Halloween.
Poor Nielsen plays Kay, an overworked waitress, in lipstick and drag. This was just painful to watch.
Among many random occurrences thrown into the plot in no particular order are gratuitous panty and boob shots; a monsters vs. heroes karaoke contest; Freddie, Jason, and a little kid in a hockey mask who gets seriously whacked in a case of mistaken identity; and a hard-to- miss giant cockroach that the lesbians in the next toilet stall nonetheless managed to miss.
Somebody evidently thot this would be funny. By "somebody" I don't mean me.
2 background facts:
(1) In Bram Stoker's classic novel Dracula, the intrepid Dutch adventurer who was the vampire count's nemesis was Abraham Van Helsing. ("Bram", incidentally, is a diminutive of "Abraham".)
(2) By vote of knowledgeable fans at the 2003 World Science Fiction Convention, the 3rd best SF film of the 20th Century was Forbidden Planet. It was released in 1956. It starred Leslie Nielsen as the heroic spaceship captain.
I have listed this film as a comedy, since that's what it purports to be. Certainly it's full of formulaic horror-movie stereotypes, which you would expect from a self-proclaimed parody. And I laffed out loud a couple of times, which means it can't sink to the absolute rock bottom of my ratingometer. That's about it for the singing of praises, tho.
The protagonist is the slacker video clerk Stan Helsing (family name simply Helsing, not Van Helsing), who keeps getting mistaken for his ancestor by people who are particularly well informed on this issue while otherwise showing a remarkable tendency to drown while gazing upward open-mouthed during a rainstorm.
Stan (Steve Howey) and 3 friends set out for a Halloween party. One of the group, Nadine (Diora Baird) is Stan's ex-girlfriend, she's pretty emphatic about the "ex" part, and we see in flashback why she feels that way, as Stan is one of the most insensitive lunkheads on the planet. This raises the question "Why the hell is Nadine going to a party with this schmuck?"
No attempt is made to answer that or explain the many other improbabilities. The viewer is left to infer that the various horror-movie creatures wandering around wreaking havoc are going unnoticed because everyone else thinks they're just costumed for Halloween.
Poor Nielsen plays Kay, an overworked waitress, in lipstick and drag. This was just painful to watch.
Among many random occurrences thrown into the plot in no particular order are gratuitous panty and boob shots; a monsters vs. heroes karaoke contest; Freddie, Jason, and a little kid in a hockey mask who gets seriously whacked in a case of mistaken identity; and a hard-to- miss giant cockroach that the lesbians in the next toilet stall nonetheless managed to miss.
Somebody evidently thot this would be funny. By "somebody" I don't mean me.