I am a masochist. That is why I am trying to see all the movies from Harry Medved's book "The 50 Worst Films of All Time" as well as all of the Bottom 100 from IMDb. Masochism is the only thing that would explain it. Tonight I actually watched two films from the IMDb list. One, "I Can Do Bad All By Myself", turned out to actually be pretty good. On the other hand, "Way of the Vampire" was exactly what the masochist within me was seeking--a really, really bad film! Now it's hard to make a vampire film bad enough to be considered horrible--after all, there have been dozens and dozens of vampire films--some good, some bad. It takes a lot to make one that is so bad that it rises above the rest in wretchedness--and even worse than such entries as "Dracula: Dead and Loving It" (ooh, the pain). Other than "Die-Hard Dracula" (which is in my top 5 of worst films of all-time--not just among vampire films, but ALL films), the only other vampire film to make this list of the worst 100 is "Way of the Vampire" and it earns it for completely different reasons than "Die-Hard Dracula".
"Die-Hard Dracula" appeared to have been made using a home video camera and $6 worth of software. The other $35 dollars in the budget was spent for acting and script and stock footage--so it's no wonder that the film looks like a bad YouTube submission! But, "Way of the Vampire" is very different in that it looks great--a lot of money was spent on special effects and it looks professional. On the other hand, it has the most annoying dialog of perhaps any film in history--even worse than John Wayne's "The Conquerer". Each and every line of dialog sounds so incredibly pained and earnest--because the film is so very full of its own sense of self-importance. And on top of that, all the characters sounded like douche bags (am I allowed to say this--it's crass but right on the money). Imagine...it's a film where everyone talks like pained über-Goths--all the time and in every scene. It's absolutely terrible but also very funny because it's oh so bad.
In addition to horrendous dialog that would embarrass most 7th graders, the film pretty much ignores all the vampire canon out there. Van Helsing is NOTHING like any Van Helsing I've ever seen before (including the Hugh Jackman version) and it turns out he's an immortal and a bit of a vampirey guy himself! And the vampires---they are all young and pretty hipsters--like having the cast of "Beverly Hills 90210" if they all became vampires! Also, while I love inclusion in films, what is a Black vampire doing in Transylvania in the middle ages when the film begins?! Doesn't this seem a bit anachronistic?! Or, perhaps the writers were so dumb that such an obvious problem didn't get noticed--or that they thought their audience was too dumb to see this.
Annoying and full of itself, this is one incredibly bad film from start to finish. It's like being locked in a room with 100 incredibly whiny Goths who just won't shut up for two seconds!!!
"Die-Hard Dracula" appeared to have been made using a home video camera and $6 worth of software. The other $35 dollars in the budget was spent for acting and script and stock footage--so it's no wonder that the film looks like a bad YouTube submission! But, "Way of the Vampire" is very different in that it looks great--a lot of money was spent on special effects and it looks professional. On the other hand, it has the most annoying dialog of perhaps any film in history--even worse than John Wayne's "The Conquerer". Each and every line of dialog sounds so incredibly pained and earnest--because the film is so very full of its own sense of self-importance. And on top of that, all the characters sounded like douche bags (am I allowed to say this--it's crass but right on the money). Imagine...it's a film where everyone talks like pained über-Goths--all the time and in every scene. It's absolutely terrible but also very funny because it's oh so bad.
In addition to horrendous dialog that would embarrass most 7th graders, the film pretty much ignores all the vampire canon out there. Van Helsing is NOTHING like any Van Helsing I've ever seen before (including the Hugh Jackman version) and it turns out he's an immortal and a bit of a vampirey guy himself! And the vampires---they are all young and pretty hipsters--like having the cast of "Beverly Hills 90210" if they all became vampires! Also, while I love inclusion in films, what is a Black vampire doing in Transylvania in the middle ages when the film begins?! Doesn't this seem a bit anachronistic?! Or, perhaps the writers were so dumb that such an obvious problem didn't get noticed--or that they thought their audience was too dumb to see this.
Annoying and full of itself, this is one incredibly bad film from start to finish. It's like being locked in a room with 100 incredibly whiny Goths who just won't shut up for two seconds!!!