Let me start right off the bat by saying: yes, I was a big fan of NOES in the 80s, I cherish fond memories of watching the first one on VHS when I was 11, saw NOES 4 in theater and every sequel after that. No, I'm not against movie remakes; I actually look forward to them and enjoyed many of them. And even though I love horror films, I'm not a purist (yes, I loved Halloween III- there, I said it!).
But come on! It doesn't take a horror fan boy to realize this NOES remake is simply a horrible, horrible experiment gone bad, and NOT in a good way! I can only imagine the brainstorm they must have had when deciding to remake NOES. "People, what can we do to butcher ---- hrrrr ---- redo NOES"? *********** SPOILERS ************* JOE: Oh I know! Let's re-use key scenes from the original film, but with cheesier effects! Better yet, let's just do them with poor CGI instead.
DAN: You know, we should do something about replacing the original actor the fans loved so much. Let's use a shorter guy instead, and... oh, while we're at it: make him look like a melted weazle, and feed him cheesy dialogue lines.
MARC: Dan, you can't stop there! You know what we should do to make sure the fans really dislike him? Make him a pedophile.
DAN: Are you sure Marc? I mean, this is a drastic change... In the original, Freddy was like the image of the boogieman... He killed those kids because he was evil. But there is nothing about ped...
MARC: I'm telling you Dan! This will be killer! The crowd will turn cold.
JOE: I buy that! Greaaaaaaat idea! Let's push that idea throughout the story. It'll teach them to root for Freddy in the other versions! OK, what else? MARC: Let's use deep and low post-processed digital audio to change Freddy's voice. Oh, and LOTs of reverb. LOOOOOTS of it! Because, it's dreams, you know. Scaaaaaaryyyy! JOE: Awesome! Here's one: the teens should be played by adults.
DAN: Wasn't that a complaint from the teens in horror films of the 80s? JOE: You're right. Well, it's like they say: if it ain't broken, don't fix it! ------------------ OK.... all in all, I think you get the drift.
Really, I didn't think it was possible to butcher one of the greatest horror icon of the 80s/90s. But they surely succeeded to kill the spirit of Freddy in this version of NOES.
Robert, we miss you dearly.
But come on! It doesn't take a horror fan boy to realize this NOES remake is simply a horrible, horrible experiment gone bad, and NOT in a good way! I can only imagine the brainstorm they must have had when deciding to remake NOES. "People, what can we do to butcher ---- hrrrr ---- redo NOES"? *********** SPOILERS ************* JOE: Oh I know! Let's re-use key scenes from the original film, but with cheesier effects! Better yet, let's just do them with poor CGI instead.
DAN: You know, we should do something about replacing the original actor the fans loved so much. Let's use a shorter guy instead, and... oh, while we're at it: make him look like a melted weazle, and feed him cheesy dialogue lines.
MARC: Dan, you can't stop there! You know what we should do to make sure the fans really dislike him? Make him a pedophile.
DAN: Are you sure Marc? I mean, this is a drastic change... In the original, Freddy was like the image of the boogieman... He killed those kids because he was evil. But there is nothing about ped...
MARC: I'm telling you Dan! This will be killer! The crowd will turn cold.
JOE: I buy that! Greaaaaaaat idea! Let's push that idea throughout the story. It'll teach them to root for Freddy in the other versions! OK, what else? MARC: Let's use deep and low post-processed digital audio to change Freddy's voice. Oh, and LOTs of reverb. LOOOOOTS of it! Because, it's dreams, you know. Scaaaaaaryyyy! JOE: Awesome! Here's one: the teens should be played by adults.
DAN: Wasn't that a complaint from the teens in horror films of the 80s? JOE: You're right. Well, it's like they say: if it ain't broken, don't fix it! ------------------ OK.... all in all, I think you get the drift.
Really, I didn't think it was possible to butcher one of the greatest horror icon of the 80s/90s. But they surely succeeded to kill the spirit of Freddy in this version of NOES.
Robert, we miss you dearly.