Asking slasher fans to kill the plodding 110 minutes of this bland Canuxploitation film is the only bizarre form of murder you'll encounter while watching "Happy Birthday to Me". Dull, slow-paced, and constantly trying to throw the viewer "off scent" as to who the real murderer is which makes the already insipid plot annoyingly repetitive.
Virgina is part of the too cool for school "top ten" clique at a Canadian private school. Right off the bat I would want to knock off these annoying punks without any provocation whatsoever. Secondly, besides Melissa Sue Anderson, whose character is supposed to be turning eighteen, most of the other students look old enough to be teaching the classes rather than attending them. One of the ten is murdered at the beginning of the film yet the others don't seem too concerned when her character just disappears. Guess the "top ten" ain't that close. A series of confusing relationships exist between the ten, especially Virginia and a couple of the male members, that there is no coherency as to a motive for the murder. It doesn't help things that Virginia, who has blackouts stemming from a serious car crash that killed her mother, consorts with men who at certain moments act like homicidal murderers. One such gentleman sneaks into her home just to steal her panties. Another takes her to a church belfry where he decides to approach her menacingly with a knife. If that isn't enough a glasses wearing dork with a pet rat (how did he get in the top ten?) pretends that he decapitated the girl who was murdered at the beginning. Why would you hang around these jerks? Eventually Virgina begins to believe that she is responsible for the disappearance of her friends which she confides in her psychologist Dr. Faraday (Glenn Ford who should be in something better). If you happen to stay awake until the ending you're in for one of the most confusing explanations in movie history. At this point I couldn't have cared less.
As for the bizarre murders, you'll be sorely disappointed as there is nothing memorable about any of them. A shish-ka-bob skewer to the throat? Yawn. A brain surgery scene is shown for no other reason then to try and up the gore factor which skimps out in major parts. Dr. Farady's death is a prime example of this as the room is covered in blood like someone shot it out of a hose and yet the actual death scene is not entirely shown. With its little gore, no nudity, cardboard cutout characters and asinine story this could have easily been edited into a Lifetime Channel movie of the week which I think is one of the worse possible things to say about a horror movie ever.
Virgina is part of the too cool for school "top ten" clique at a Canadian private school. Right off the bat I would want to knock off these annoying punks without any provocation whatsoever. Secondly, besides Melissa Sue Anderson, whose character is supposed to be turning eighteen, most of the other students look old enough to be teaching the classes rather than attending them. One of the ten is murdered at the beginning of the film yet the others don't seem too concerned when her character just disappears. Guess the "top ten" ain't that close. A series of confusing relationships exist between the ten, especially Virginia and a couple of the male members, that there is no coherency as to a motive for the murder. It doesn't help things that Virginia, who has blackouts stemming from a serious car crash that killed her mother, consorts with men who at certain moments act like homicidal murderers. One such gentleman sneaks into her home just to steal her panties. Another takes her to a church belfry where he decides to approach her menacingly with a knife. If that isn't enough a glasses wearing dork with a pet rat (how did he get in the top ten?) pretends that he decapitated the girl who was murdered at the beginning. Why would you hang around these jerks? Eventually Virgina begins to believe that she is responsible for the disappearance of her friends which she confides in her psychologist Dr. Faraday (Glenn Ford who should be in something better). If you happen to stay awake until the ending you're in for one of the most confusing explanations in movie history. At this point I couldn't have cared less.
As for the bizarre murders, you'll be sorely disappointed as there is nothing memorable about any of them. A shish-ka-bob skewer to the throat? Yawn. A brain surgery scene is shown for no other reason then to try and up the gore factor which skimps out in major parts. Dr. Farady's death is a prime example of this as the room is covered in blood like someone shot it out of a hose and yet the actual death scene is not entirely shown. With its little gore, no nudity, cardboard cutout characters and asinine story this could have easily been edited into a Lifetime Channel movie of the week which I think is one of the worse possible things to say about a horror movie ever.