I've still got nine or ten 'video nasties' to go before I have reviewed them all, but I'll go out on a limb here and say that, out of all 74 films on the list (including non-nasties Xtro and Shogun Assassin) Frozen Scream has got to be the worst. More boring than Unhinged, technically shoddier than Blood Rites, and less coherent than Revenge of the Bogeyman, this one stinks in ways that even Jess Franco hasn't managed.
Directed with zero finesse by Frank Roach and sloppily edited by the equally inept Matthew Muller, this fetid, chaotic mess plumbs new depths of awfulness to tell its dreadful tale of mad scientists searching for the secret to eternal youth. With wild-eyed mustachioed zombies in monks' robes, a crazed doctor and his unintelligible foreign assistant, a Halloween party with some incredibly bad dancing, a blonde with nice jubblies, and a monotonous voice-over that continually drowns out the characters' dialogue, one might at least expect a few unintentional laughs along the way, but the whole affair is so painfully clumsy in every department that I never cracked a smile.
Precisely what qualified this as a 'nasty' in the eyes of the BBFC is hard to say: if it was the patently fake axe in the head scene that had the censors bringing up their lunch, I'm surprised that ANY horror film actually saw the light of day in the UK.
If you should sit down to watch this diabolical dung-heap of a film, even though common sense tells you otherwise, why not play the BA_Harrison Frozen Scream Drinking Game© to make matters much less painful: just have a shot every time someone says 'immortal' and you'll be bladdered in no time.
Directed with zero finesse by Frank Roach and sloppily edited by the equally inept Matthew Muller, this fetid, chaotic mess plumbs new depths of awfulness to tell its dreadful tale of mad scientists searching for the secret to eternal youth. With wild-eyed mustachioed zombies in monks' robes, a crazed doctor and his unintelligible foreign assistant, a Halloween party with some incredibly bad dancing, a blonde with nice jubblies, and a monotonous voice-over that continually drowns out the characters' dialogue, one might at least expect a few unintentional laughs along the way, but the whole affair is so painfully clumsy in every department that I never cracked a smile.
Precisely what qualified this as a 'nasty' in the eyes of the BBFC is hard to say: if it was the patently fake axe in the head scene that had the censors bringing up their lunch, I'm surprised that ANY horror film actually saw the light of day in the UK.
If you should sit down to watch this diabolical dung-heap of a film, even though common sense tells you otherwise, why not play the BA_Harrison Frozen Scream Drinking Game© to make matters much less painful: just have a shot every time someone says 'immortal' and you'll be bladdered in no time.