In 1972, Wolfhound might have made a decent "bad" drive-in movie for teenage boys. They could ogle the hot naked chicks when they were on screen, then hoot and holler at how awful everything else was. In 2002, there were too few drive-in movies and too much readily available porn for Wolfhound to serve any purpose whatsoever. It has a plot that would bore the pants off an 8 year old. You've heard of dialog that sounds better on the page? This dialog would sound better as sign language. The acting here more closely resembles the amateur ventriloquism of a sociopath.
Colum Kennedy (Allen Scotti and yes, the character's name is Colum, not Colin) is an American writer who returns to his boyhood home in Ireland to write a book about his family history. He's dragged his much less attractive wife Stella (Jennifer Courtney) and his two kids along with him. It's a little hard to describe the rest of the story because quite a lot of the story is only alluded to and never definitively told. Characters are frequently making references to things that never happen in the film nor are even explained. Basically, it's a journey of self-discovery where Colum has sex with a Irish Wolfhound that morphs into a hot naked chick (Julie Cialini) in order to discover the Irish Wolfhound in himself. That sounds like the greatest Guinness commercial ever but trust me, it makes for an awful motion picture.
Julie Cialini is very pretty and has a great head of hair. She can't act, not even enough to fake a terrible Irish accent, but she looks great with no clothes on. It's difficult to evaluate the rest of the cast because they give such emotionally discordant performances. The feelings they project don't match up with the words they say or the situations they're in.
The most notably ridiculous thing about this movie is the lengths gone to in order to make the Irish Wolfhound look like a menacing animal. I'm not sure if it's the nature of the breed or the dogs in this film were all drugged, but these are the least threatening animals you've ever seen. The meerkats from Meerkat Manor on Animal Plant have a more vicious appearance. A few times when they try to show a dog baring his teeth, it sure seems like they just shoot a close-up of the end of his snout while someone's hands off screen pull on the dog's upper lip to make it look like he's snarling.
Wolfhound is badly written, badly directed and apparently badly acted. There are plenty of moments with Cialini in her birthday suit, including one where she's joined by an even more attractive and bustier woman. Every known copy of this movie should be transferred onto film and shipped through the Time Tunnel back to 1972 where it could do some good for packs of dateless teenage smartasses on Saturday nights. There's no need for it to exist in our time.
Colum Kennedy (Allen Scotti and yes, the character's name is Colum, not Colin) is an American writer who returns to his boyhood home in Ireland to write a book about his family history. He's dragged his much less attractive wife Stella (Jennifer Courtney) and his two kids along with him. It's a little hard to describe the rest of the story because quite a lot of the story is only alluded to and never definitively told. Characters are frequently making references to things that never happen in the film nor are even explained. Basically, it's a journey of self-discovery where Colum has sex with a Irish Wolfhound that morphs into a hot naked chick (Julie Cialini) in order to discover the Irish Wolfhound in himself. That sounds like the greatest Guinness commercial ever but trust me, it makes for an awful motion picture.
Julie Cialini is very pretty and has a great head of hair. She can't act, not even enough to fake a terrible Irish accent, but she looks great with no clothes on. It's difficult to evaluate the rest of the cast because they give such emotionally discordant performances. The feelings they project don't match up with the words they say or the situations they're in.
The most notably ridiculous thing about this movie is the lengths gone to in order to make the Irish Wolfhound look like a menacing animal. I'm not sure if it's the nature of the breed or the dogs in this film were all drugged, but these are the least threatening animals you've ever seen. The meerkats from Meerkat Manor on Animal Plant have a more vicious appearance. A few times when they try to show a dog baring his teeth, it sure seems like they just shoot a close-up of the end of his snout while someone's hands off screen pull on the dog's upper lip to make it look like he's snarling.
Wolfhound is badly written, badly directed and apparently badly acted. There are plenty of moments with Cialini in her birthday suit, including one where she's joined by an even more attractive and bustier woman. Every known copy of this movie should be transferred onto film and shipped through the Time Tunnel back to 1972 where it could do some good for packs of dateless teenage smartasses on Saturday nights. There's no need for it to exist in our time.