5/10
Its structure resembles a brainless video game, but with more grunting.
6 August 2011
Warning: Spoilers
Diego Carter (Echavarria) is a world-famous MMA fighter who is enticed by a mannish woman named Sandra (Koys) to join an underground Punchfighting circuit. It is run by the ruthless Seifer (Kilpatrick) - ruthless in the sense that what he's really running is a prostitution ring. He calls them "consorts", and if you win a match, you get a consort, or your opponent's consort, or something like that. It's all just a tawdry excuse to have Skinemax-style softcore porn scenes with plenty of unwanted, un-asked for Hector Echavarria nudity. Ew. All this nonsense leads up to "The Tournament", presumably the ultimate battle for the ultimate consort. Also, Carter falls in love with Sandra. What's REALLY going on? This movie is like a 90-minute training video for Hector Echavarria. Somehow he was allowed to direct this thing, and it has all the inept editing and strange cuts you might expect. You never see blows connect because there's an unnecessary cut right before the blow lands.Undue emphasis is put on the fact that he uses the late night-advertised product the Perfect Pushup in his training rituals. Echavarria invited all his fighter buddies to be in the movie, whether they belong there or not, and they even go by some of their real names.

In the beginning of the film, two burly men in shorts are grappling, grunting and sweating while a song with the lyrics "45 minutes of Loooove" plays. Then they grab each other's legs for the takedown. Wags who would decry these movies as homoerotic...may have a point here.

Also it should be noted that Diego's "...punches carry the dream of a small child who grew up off the coast of La Plata." Naturally, The Tournament has "no rules and no referees", and Seifer notes, "is tax free". Is this a comment on today's political landscape? I know I go to modern-day Punchfighters for top-shelf punditry.

Patrick Kilpatrick looks like Howie Mandel now, and screams and yells just like Nick Mancuso in Death Warrior. However, this movie makes Death Warrior look like a masterpiece. James Russo is barely in it, which was a disappointment.On the bright side, Crusher's involved.

Overall, this movie is beyond dumb. Its structure resembles a brainless video game, but with more grunting.

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