That score! That dialogue! That awkward pointlessness! What in hell happened here? In similar situations, I usually half-jokingly say "I don't even want to know". But in this case, I really, really wanna know! For whatever reason this movie ended up like it did, it was definitely intentional. It didn't take a long time to figure that out. Somehow, that doesn't take away at all from how completely insane and random this movie is! It's like Troll 2, or Horror House On Highway Five, with maybe a little Zombie '90 thrown in. Exactly! That's the kinda odd I'm talking' about, here. Which makes me wonder How in the hell could I have gone as long as I did without seeing it? That's the part that gets me the most. And by the way, I adore this film. Mainly because I can watch it a thousand times and still have no idea what's going on. Now, that's what I call rewatch value! Whilst searching for next awesome B-movie for my collection, this is the kinda thing I'm always hoping to eventually unearth. It rarely happens, which makes it all the more satisfying once it does. Such a disasterpiece, that Things truly is a masterpiece. A masterpiece of the odd, the surreal, and the confusing. Why can't Troma ever release stuff like this? I'm gonna watch this movie so many times, it ain't even funny! And not to mention the recently released DVD offers two audio commentary tracks. There's gotta be something in one of those which offers some sort of an explanation. Although, if there isn't, somehow, I won't be surprised. If you like 'em bad in all the right ways, this confused Super-8 epic is nothing short of a beautiful experience... Oh! And yeah. I did notice how I said absolutely nothing about a plot. Trust me. It makes no difference. 10/10
Review of Things
