"this review contains spoilers"
Year 2000.A movie made to compete with the likes of Mission impossible 2 and the gladiator.!!A movie made to launch the acting career of a former ski racing champion.Boy o boy did everything take a u-turn down the toilet after its release,well you only have watch the first ten minutes to understand what I'm talking about!!Alberto Tomba or Il grande Albertone as the Italian press called him,stares in "Alex l'Ariete" a crime/police action flick considered to be the worst film ever in the history of Italian cinema and the cult of trash!!what an hon-our..
What can i say!!just calling it a film is a "compliment".The acting is elementary,a plot that seems to be written by seven year olds,the protagonists suffer loss of memory,but a minute later remember everything!a quick example is when Alex(Tomba)is transfered by his superior to a little town(Monte dell'olmo) in the Alps.when the conversation between the two takes place Alex asks his superior where Monte dell'olmo is located??the superior replies that he doesn't know!a minute later talking with a friend Alex says that he is being transfered in the alps.what?mind you thats not the only problem!unfortunately...
In many scenes the dubbing is scandalously bad as if the dubbing director rushed it to go on holiday,numerous sequences make no sense and don't relate in any manner with the actual plot,they seem thrown in to make the film last at least an hour,because from my eye half an hour would of been sufficient to sum up the whole story.When did you ever witness a film run for 30 minutes?i haven't,but they could of done an exception here.Special effects are nowhere to be seen..Tomba blasts away rounds of machine gun fire towards a mini lorry which strangely doesn't suffer any king of damage.not even a little hole on the entire structure but just a few sparks.... magic!!
its meant to be a dramatic film but its filled with moments of unintentional comedy,the actors act as if the situation is critical but in reality they make you burst into laughter not only for their acting but also for their facial expressions..it has to be said that on this matter the master that steals the show is Mr Alberto Tomba.during filming notice that his eyes are moving,why,you may ask?? hes reading the play script because he cant remember two words "Porcaccia la miseria".there are many other moments where the the play script is used on a frequent basis mind you..i don't want to spoil the fun!!
the film was released in July.A super flop at the box office,with a budget of 6 million euros,it earned a miserable 3 and half thousand euros and to justify the films failure Alberto tomba said in the press that "in summer periods nobody goes to the cinema".what a brick!!! i prefer not to say nothing more on the subject.
Damiano Damiani was the director.he must of been either absent during filming and directed it via telephone or must of suffered severe brain damage!!nothing else can explain how a decent director who in the 1960's produced decent movies recognized worldwide,and directed italy's finest actors such as Sophia Loren and Claudia Cardinale just to name a few came out of the blues and deliver this dustbin??What on earth was he thinking with this failure?Was it way to celebrate the new millennium?? no comment
Alex l'Ariete made me laugh so so hard and loud for a whole year.during classes my friend and i would sit through lessons watching it,we would laugh so much that we got to the point of having belly ache,to be on the verge of tears and getting shouted by the teacher!!damn it was fun!! Tomba's face!!!epic
as a comedy-recommended so to have fun with your friends and family,otherwise as crime/police flick its to be avoided!!!
comedy, my vote 10/10
action flick, my vote 0/10
Year 2000.A movie made to compete with the likes of Mission impossible 2 and the gladiator.!!A movie made to launch the acting career of a former ski racing champion.Boy o boy did everything take a u-turn down the toilet after its release,well you only have watch the first ten minutes to understand what I'm talking about!!Alberto Tomba or Il grande Albertone as the Italian press called him,stares in "Alex l'Ariete" a crime/police action flick considered to be the worst film ever in the history of Italian cinema and the cult of trash!!what an hon-our..
What can i say!!just calling it a film is a "compliment".The acting is elementary,a plot that seems to be written by seven year olds,the protagonists suffer loss of memory,but a minute later remember everything!a quick example is when Alex(Tomba)is transfered by his superior to a little town(Monte dell'olmo) in the Alps.when the conversation between the two takes place Alex asks his superior where Monte dell'olmo is located??the superior replies that he doesn't know!a minute later talking with a friend Alex says that he is being transfered in the alps.what?mind you thats not the only problem!unfortunately...
In many scenes the dubbing is scandalously bad as if the dubbing director rushed it to go on holiday,numerous sequences make no sense and don't relate in any manner with the actual plot,they seem thrown in to make the film last at least an hour,because from my eye half an hour would of been sufficient to sum up the whole story.When did you ever witness a film run for 30 minutes?i haven't,but they could of done an exception here.Special effects are nowhere to be seen..Tomba blasts away rounds of machine gun fire towards a mini lorry which strangely doesn't suffer any king of damage.not even a little hole on the entire structure but just a few sparks.... magic!!
its meant to be a dramatic film but its filled with moments of unintentional comedy,the actors act as if the situation is critical but in reality they make you burst into laughter not only for their acting but also for their facial expressions..it has to be said that on this matter the master that steals the show is Mr Alberto Tomba.during filming notice that his eyes are moving,why,you may ask?? hes reading the play script because he cant remember two words "Porcaccia la miseria".there are many other moments where the the play script is used on a frequent basis mind you..i don't want to spoil the fun!!
the film was released in July.A super flop at the box office,with a budget of 6 million euros,it earned a miserable 3 and half thousand euros and to justify the films failure Alberto tomba said in the press that "in summer periods nobody goes to the cinema".what a brick!!! i prefer not to say nothing more on the subject.
Damiano Damiani was the director.he must of been either absent during filming and directed it via telephone or must of suffered severe brain damage!!nothing else can explain how a decent director who in the 1960's produced decent movies recognized worldwide,and directed italy's finest actors such as Sophia Loren and Claudia Cardinale just to name a few came out of the blues and deliver this dustbin??What on earth was he thinking with this failure?Was it way to celebrate the new millennium?? no comment
Alex l'Ariete made me laugh so so hard and loud for a whole year.during classes my friend and i would sit through lessons watching it,we would laugh so much that we got to the point of having belly ache,to be on the verge of tears and getting shouted by the teacher!!damn it was fun!! Tomba's face!!!epic
as a comedy-recommended so to have fun with your friends and family,otherwise as crime/police flick its to be avoided!!!
comedy, my vote 10/10
action flick, my vote 0/10