Review of Noah

Noah (2014)
2/10
As an attempted bible re-telling or it's own work - Just awful
22 September 2014
This is one of the worst movies I've seen in years. For only a brief moment did I even care about the characters (the casting wasn't actually that bad), but the story was lost from the outset. If you are going to deviate so drastically from a traditional tale, then at least do a good job of creating something new and interesting. I watched this show with the full knowledge that the writers had used some artistic license, but I was not expecting such a horrible mess of a film. The special effects looked like something from the 1980's and whoever made the decision to portray the fallen angels as beings made from stone should be banned from Hollywood for life. And what was the point of the role of Methuselah in this portrayal? Just a strange, random and pointless character, contributing nothing but confusion.

As a 'science fiction' film, this movie is poorly done but the real tragedy of this attempt is that it lost almost everything about the original story. As a stand alone fairy tale, this film is utterly underwhelming, but as a representation of a tale from the bible it will just confuse people as to the original telling. This movie was a lost opportunity to explore the scriptures, the impossibilities and the doubts of the story of the ark. Instead it will just be lost in the annals of Hollywood detritus.
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