The Child (2012)
1/10
So bad it's.......well, bad.
29 June 2015
What in the name of Morgan Freeman is this rubbish? The acting was so wooden it gave me splinters....sadly, they were in my eyes! The plot didn't even have the decency to revel in it's own ridiculousness....and the execution? For such a teeny budget it didn't look bad but the set-pieces that were there to disquiet verged on 6th-form, end-of-term parody. Creepy for all the wrong reasons. What a shame a good idea took the wrong direction. Sure it would have been better in German. Maybe even in Norwegian or Welsh....at least then I wouldn't have to understand the clunky dialogue and painful delivery.

I'm going off now to exfoliate with sandpaper to try and get rid of this grubby feeling.
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