I used to be of the opinion that King Solomon's Mines (1985) was simply a shoddy Indiana Jones rip-off, but, after a recent re-watch, came to the rather generous conclusion that it was in fact a sly parody, which explained its sheer preposterousness. Likewise, Allan Quatermain and the Lost City of Gold, director Gary Nelson's sequel, wants desperately to be a whole lot of over-the-top, tongue-in-cheek, campy fun, but fails spectacularly, the shoddy script, pitiful performances, poorly mounted action scenes, pathetic attempts at comedy, lousy special effects and overall cheapness making for a thoroughly cringe-worthy experience.
Richard Chamberlain and Sharon Stone return as Allan Quatermain and Jesse Huston, who embark on an expedition to find a lost city of gold (lost, despite being clearly visible for miles around and easily seen from the sky). Accompanying them on their mission are warrior Umslopogaas (James Earl Jones, wishing he had a different agent) and devious holy man Swarma (Robert Donner, putting in an incredibly irritating performance). After a perilous journey (which sees trouble with hostile natives, deadly booby traps, and a white-knuckle canoe trip through a mountain) the group arrive at their destination, where they meet Quatermain's missing brother Robeson (Martin Rabbett), but come to blows with evil high priest Agon (Henry Silva in a really bad wig), who wants to seize control of the city.
There are simply too many naff moments for me to mention, but lowlights include an attack by silly-looking rock worms, the laughable high speed boat ride (which features very unconvincing blue screen effects), a hilarious swarm of bats (of the clockwork variety), some truly groan-worthy nonsense involving the wearing of spear-proof vests, Agon speaking in his native tongue, Quatermain melting a gold lion statue by hitting it with an axe (?!!?!), and some awful stunt-work in which the wires are clearly visible.
1.5 out of 10, generously rounded up to 2 for the vaguely Spielbergian mouldy corpses and occasional spot of hokey gore, and for buxom Cassandra Petersen (better known as Elvira) as wicked queen Sorais.
Richard Chamberlain and Sharon Stone return as Allan Quatermain and Jesse Huston, who embark on an expedition to find a lost city of gold (lost, despite being clearly visible for miles around and easily seen from the sky). Accompanying them on their mission are warrior Umslopogaas (James Earl Jones, wishing he had a different agent) and devious holy man Swarma (Robert Donner, putting in an incredibly irritating performance). After a perilous journey (which sees trouble with hostile natives, deadly booby traps, and a white-knuckle canoe trip through a mountain) the group arrive at their destination, where they meet Quatermain's missing brother Robeson (Martin Rabbett), but come to blows with evil high priest Agon (Henry Silva in a really bad wig), who wants to seize control of the city.
There are simply too many naff moments for me to mention, but lowlights include an attack by silly-looking rock worms, the laughable high speed boat ride (which features very unconvincing blue screen effects), a hilarious swarm of bats (of the clockwork variety), some truly groan-worthy nonsense involving the wearing of spear-proof vests, Agon speaking in his native tongue, Quatermain melting a gold lion statue by hitting it with an axe (?!!?!), and some awful stunt-work in which the wires are clearly visible.
1.5 out of 10, generously rounded up to 2 for the vaguely Spielbergian mouldy corpses and occasional spot of hokey gore, and for buxom Cassandra Petersen (better known as Elvira) as wicked queen Sorais.