Review of Geostorm

Geostorm (2017)
3/10
Shutting down your brain in 10... 9... 8...
20 November 2017
Hollywood studio boss: "Okay, folks, I want you to use everything that's been going through the global press for the last two years: Occupational disasters, storms, climate change. Just mix it together like a salad. And because my son has just turned twelve, I want this film to be dedicated only to twelve-year-old males. Okay, my son is not the brightest and he loves explosions and space ships - preferably exploding space ships - so make something he'll like for sure. Blow something up and stuff like that."

Submissive employee:"But shouldn't we also involve women?" Hollywood studio boss: "Sure. The standard clichés will do fine: a little girl who is interested in electronics and science, although we all know that girls at this age are just sitting in front of Youtube, watching make-up videos. But hey, that's what people want to see. And something about a female special agent kicking balls. That came out pretty well in the' 80s, I'm sure it still works."

Submissive servant:"Don't you think that we are mentally undercharging the audience and pretending that they're all mentally under-exposed?"

Hollywood studio boss: "Hell, they ARE. Oh - and because the whole world laughs at our President, I want the President of the United States to play a role that is better off than this living joke in the Oval Office. I want my son to believe that the President of the United States is smarter than Goofy. At least."
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