13 Cameras (2015)
6/10
Not the best, but certainly not the worst
20 October 2018
Warning: Spoilers
Do you know what? I actually enjoyed this film. It's taken a brutal beating on here, and I get why. I never read reviews of films before I watch them, I think knowing roughly what you're about to see, takes something away from the experience. So I'm glad I didn't read the reviews for 13 Cameras. Chances are, I would have not bothered. As it happens, I watched it with an open mind without prior knowledge (I'd actually never heard of it) and quite enjoyed it. To do this, I think you have to imagine this situation is happening to you. Imagine that you might be being watched 24/7 by a vile, repulsive, depraved old pervert who knows your every move and let's himself into your home while you're out to adjust the cameras for a better view of you in the shower, creates a soundproof cell in the basement you don't know about, sniffs your underwear and sucks your toothbrush for good measure.

The landlord is the star of the show and will make your skin crawl. The other characters - the sly cheating husband, the charming unassuming pregnant wife and the obsessive mistress - are all quite flat in persona and like all good horror film victims, make terrible decisions when in danger. We have to guess the purpose of the basement cell, but bunny boiler mistress finds herself locked in there after turning up to confront lover boy who, aware of bunny boilers intentions, has taken wifey out for the evening. Landlord tends to his chained victim for a couple of days while his tenants are out, feeding her bacon donuts (his own staple meal) and emptying her toilet (a plastic bucket) down the kitchen sink. From therein it's murder, suspense and kidnap. Not necessarily in that order.

Landlord wins the showdown and seemingly keeps pregnant wife alive, at least long enough for her to give birth, as the film closes out with dirty landlord and baby driving off into the sunset, presumably as father and son, to fit some more cameras to a property.

All in all I enjoyed this. I've seen much much worse.
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