Filmed in Crap-O-Vision, Alfonsio Breschia must have decided that the previous film, War of the Planets, was too much fun, because War of the Robots is an endurance test that only the hardiest viewer can survive. Most sensible people will have switched off long before the end.
A bunch of really dodgy looking robots in gold outfits and wearing wigs that make them look like either Brian Jones/Lady Gaga/Dave Hill from Slade turn up on Earth and kidnap genetic scientist Professor Carr and his assistant Melissa Longo. They head off for the planet Anthor with Antonio Sabato in pursuit, as the Professor has switched on some atomic reactor that could destroy Earth or something. That's the excuse Sabato is using, but the real reason is he's been knocking boots with Longo and doesn't want that piece of tail to end up in another galaxy.
They all end up on a planet where the wiggy robots are harvesting these blind aliens for organ parts, so Sabato et al turn up and waste the lot of them, earning the respect of their non-blind leader Kuba. They are very lucky to find Kuba, because he's going to be getting them out of a lot of tight spots in the future. He's also played by the actor who played the alien in the last film and may naturally be gold in colour.
Such is the mystery of these films, but let's talk about how crap the battles are. Everyone carries a small laser blaster that kind of light up at the end when they are supposed to be fired, and I understand budgets were cheap, but couldn't they seem to forget to dub on the laser noises half the time, so people just fall over when someone points a gun at them. Don't get me started on how badly the robots fall over either...or the 'light sabres'.
Eventually they get to Anthor and we find out that there's a bunch of old people who have made Longo their Empress, but is she bluffing or not? Many things happen that no one cares about, and finally we get to part that absolutely sinks this entire film: the interminable space battle that last for twenty-minutes. This battle features people watching the battle unfold on a computer display that looks like the game Asteroids, people pretending to sit in spaceships that don't make any sense to the viewer, terrible shots of spaceships flying towards each other used over and over and over again, and folk on Earth doing a bit of commentary. I cannot emphasise enough how awful this entire scene is, or how twenty minutes could stretch out into timeless fathoms of beeping noises, flashing, and Antonio Sabato's flared nostrils.
I can picture Sabato signing up for this crap, but Giacomo Rossi-Stuart? Gianni Garko's in the next one. Have some dignity people!
A bunch of really dodgy looking robots in gold outfits and wearing wigs that make them look like either Brian Jones/Lady Gaga/Dave Hill from Slade turn up on Earth and kidnap genetic scientist Professor Carr and his assistant Melissa Longo. They head off for the planet Anthor with Antonio Sabato in pursuit, as the Professor has switched on some atomic reactor that could destroy Earth or something. That's the excuse Sabato is using, but the real reason is he's been knocking boots with Longo and doesn't want that piece of tail to end up in another galaxy.
They all end up on a planet where the wiggy robots are harvesting these blind aliens for organ parts, so Sabato et al turn up and waste the lot of them, earning the respect of their non-blind leader Kuba. They are very lucky to find Kuba, because he's going to be getting them out of a lot of tight spots in the future. He's also played by the actor who played the alien in the last film and may naturally be gold in colour.
Such is the mystery of these films, but let's talk about how crap the battles are. Everyone carries a small laser blaster that kind of light up at the end when they are supposed to be fired, and I understand budgets were cheap, but couldn't they seem to forget to dub on the laser noises half the time, so people just fall over when someone points a gun at them. Don't get me started on how badly the robots fall over either...or the 'light sabres'.
Eventually they get to Anthor and we find out that there's a bunch of old people who have made Longo their Empress, but is she bluffing or not? Many things happen that no one cares about, and finally we get to part that absolutely sinks this entire film: the interminable space battle that last for twenty-minutes. This battle features people watching the battle unfold on a computer display that looks like the game Asteroids, people pretending to sit in spaceships that don't make any sense to the viewer, terrible shots of spaceships flying towards each other used over and over and over again, and folk on Earth doing a bit of commentary. I cannot emphasise enough how awful this entire scene is, or how twenty minutes could stretch out into timeless fathoms of beeping noises, flashing, and Antonio Sabato's flared nostrils.
I can picture Sabato signing up for this crap, but Giacomo Rossi-Stuart? Gianni Garko's in the next one. Have some dignity people!