Review of Isle of Fury

. . . "What this country needs is a good five cent flick in which 'Bogart' wrestles an octopus." Always willing to do its patriotic duty, Warner Bros. soon released ISLE OF FURY, in which "Humphrey" does just that. This always eponymous film studio also takes advantage of FURY to warn American men that "Once she's seen Hawaii, she'll yearn for Paris, France." Fickle "Lucille," the bride of Bogart's "Valentine" here, hits upon any dude washing ashore, hoping such beachcombing will get her to a Mainland. (It's like Eve telling Adam, "Gardens might be nice for SOME ladies, but they give me the hives.") The sole reason that Val makes Lucy his missus in the first place is because she's literally the ONLY chick on the whole island. (If you're skeptical, just check the cast list for ISLE OF FURY.) Initially, Lucy is similarly limited (unless she wants to commit incest or miscegenation). However, Val soon learns that the fun goes out of shooting fish in a barrel when another barrel hits the beach. Warner warns viewers NOT to count their fish before they hatch, unless they don't mind sleeping with the octopi.