Review of Pali Road

Pali Road (2015)
4/10
The only people rating this movie highly
4 July 2019
Warning: Spoilers
... are clearly the white guys out there with an Asian fetish or the Chinese girls out there with a white fetish. I mean c'mon. The lead character is a chinese doctor (so presumably has a decent head on her shoulders) who is dating a grade school teacher with cheesy come on-lines earning minimum wage (and has to live in her house since he can't pay the rent in the pricey Oahu real estate market). Sooo in love is she with this dude that she shoots him down hard when he proposes, and breaks his heart saying marriage is "more than just love, it's about families coming together, kids", etc. Ok I hear you sister. Makes sense, a little harsh on the white dude but makes sense. The boyfriend is so distraught about being dumped that he loses attention of the road and crashes head on to a cement structure. Love hurts!

Strangely she wakes up no worse for wear, in satin sheets and undies in a gorgeous house with an outdoor heated pool, a Mercedes and a Bentley in the garage, and finds that she is actually married to a successful Korean doctor and has a cute little boy to boot. Hmmm don't wake me up from this coma! By all accounts the husband is tall and handsome, extremely caring, loving, generous, and gives her all the space she needs, and even treats her parents like his own.

But no.... this girl is apparently sooo in love with the white boyfriend that she rejects this new found reality, rejects even her child, and instead is rummaging through the forest at the site of the crash and a dilapidated house where she thought she lived, in order to find the boyfriend (hmmm the same guy who she refused to accept marriage to in the alternate reality she came from)? That makes zero sense. She searches for any record of this boyfriend but in this reality it seems he just doesn't exist. But everything else is the same. I guess when you have an Asian girl with a white fetish, this "nightmare" of a reality is just too much for her to handle. "I don't love you and I will never love you!" she exclaims to her "bizarro" world devoted husband in one of the final climatic moments. Wow. Really? Girl, you clearly suffered major brain damage. I won't spoil the rather mundane ending plot twist but that's basically the story line. A real face-palm through most of the movie.

The other things this movie doesn't have going for it: Michelle Chen's acting which is cringeworthy. I'm sorry, she sort of cute, but she gives off an air of snottiness that is seen in every character she plays. I don't know if that's the roles she gets or that's how she is in real life that comes through her acting. The acting from every other cast member is actually decent, and you can tell who's seasoned and who isn't. Michelle Chen looks like a newcomer but she's actually 36 years old so gotta get it together sister.

Also the movie just moved at a glacial pace. I kept looking at the clock wondering how this is a 90 minute movie, it felt like a 4-hour marathon of this girl crying on cue. The only time this movie had any excitement was when the husband and her parents had finally had enough and held her down to tell her she's crazy, stop obsessing over some imaginary white boy!

I'm giving it a 4 mostly for the acting of the other cast members, the high def images of the beautiful Hawaii landscape, and a little bit of suspense that was created at the start of the film.
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